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Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

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Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#221

Post by thenoblesunfish »

BubbleRings wrote: post #87
thenoblesunfish wrote: post #27

Get some exercise and then immediately (while still sweating) sit back down at your desk and try to start. For some reason, that was a very effective way to start my homework assignments (the hardest part) in grad school.

The above post is truly great advice. Also, pages and pages of advice here about anxiety and nobody mentions caffeine? Be aware that many people get a big increase in anxiety from just one small cup of coffee. Try a caffeine-free life for a couple months, if you have never tried it. Finally, similar to the above advice, try doing some work in the morning before your "procrastination and anxiety" side has even woken u…

Great advice about caffeine. My personal limit is one cup a day, first thing in the morning. More than that has very noticeable effects on me - positive in the short term but negative in the long term. Don't listen to what other people tell you about it, and do the experiments on yourself. Like most drugs, people seem to like brag about being able to handle it, and like most drugs, it has wildly varying effects on different people.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#222

Post by _yigw »

uhtred wrote: post #133

Why are you asking hackernews? Not everything in life can be hacked by techies on the internet even though a lot of them think otherwise. Speak to your doctor and try to see a therapist.

Because besides techies we are human beings. With feelings, experiences and perspectives.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#223

Post by _yigw »

jrib wrote: post #14

This was a slow process, but: 1. Regular written self-reflection, i.e., keeping a journal and 2. Re-framing "failures" as learning experiences; forgive yourself helped me a lot. The written part was important to me because it forced me to revisit my previous thoughts and reevaluate them in light of what had happened since last time I wrote. (2) also helped me do things with the mind-set that "failure" wasn't actually…

I've tried to keep a journal. I'm about to start again -- for the n-th time-- but i don't know how to use it, beyond writing my thoughts. How am i going to use the reflections i wrote nine days ago? Sometimes i re-read what i wrote, but i can connect with the words and thoughts that are written on the paper.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#225

Post by sinenomine »

bowsamic wrote: post #57
sinenomine wrote: post #41

I consider anxiety a low-level biological problem. It should have a biological fix. Trying to fix fundamental problem with self-reflection and psychbabble misses the point and tragically wastes years upon years.

Go on then, what is the fix?

Anxiety is one of the harder problems. The set of possible fixes basically includes this list https://slatestarcodex.com/2015/07/13/things-that-sometimes-... as well as TRT/SARMs, which are, IMO, underappreciated.

Personally I note that a combination of antiinflammatory supplements (most importantly high-dose omega-3) and magnesium L-threonate tends to help me noticeably, but my anxiety isn't intrinsic, just work-related stress.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#226

Post by Fazel94 »

_yigw wrote: post #223
jrib wrote: post #14

This was a slow process, but: 1. Regular written self-reflection, i.e., keeping a journal and 2. Re-framing "failures" as learning experiences; forgive yourself helped me a lot. The written part was important to me because it forced me to revisit my previous thoughts and reevaluate them in light of what had happened since last time I wrote. (2) also helped me do things with the mind-set that "failure" wasn't actually…

I've tried to keep a journal. I'm about to start again -- for the n-th time-- but i don't know how to use it, beyond writing my thoughts. How am i going to use the reflections i wrote nine days ago? Sometimes i re-read what i wrote, but i can connect with the words and thoughts that are written on the paper.

Here is a concise way to make it work. https://thrive.kaiserpermanente.org/care-near-you/northern-c...

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#227

Post by renaudg »

BIKESHOPagency wrote: post #194
insickness wrote: post #6

The best solution to getting past the anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle is to take small, manageable actions while accepting the feelings that go along with those actions. Start with the smallest steps possible. Maybe that means opening the assignment and saving it to your computer. Then put it down and walk away. Come back in a little while and take another small step, such as reading over the assignment or making an out…

I use tanglo app (tanglo.app) and something about just clicking "start" on a small task is enough to break the cycle for me. Tanglo is also helpful in visualizing what I can REALISTICALLY get done in my day and what happens if I don't start. When I don't start a scheduled task, it just keeps pushing it down further and further. If I procrastinate too long, tasks at the end get moved to tomorrow automatically. Which s…

This looks like a reboot of the "Timeful" app by Dan Ariely, which was bought then shut down by Google.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#228

Post by jrib »

_yigw wrote: post #223
jrib wrote: post #14

This was a slow process, but: 1. Regular written self-reflection, i.e., keeping a journal and 2. Re-framing "failures" as learning experiences; forgive yourself helped me a lot. The written part was important to me because it forced me to revisit my previous thoughts and reevaluate them in light of what had happened since last time I wrote. (2) also helped me do things with the mind-set that "failure" wasn't actually…

I've tried to keep a journal. I'm about to start again -- for the n-th time-- but i don't know how to use it, beyond writing my thoughts. How am i going to use the reflections i wrote nine days ago? Sometimes i re-read what i wrote, but i can connect with the words and thoughts that are written on the paper.

Personally, I had a specific time (Friday mornings) dedicated to journaling.

Before writing anything, I would read the previous entry.

Usually, I'd include a small goal I thought was achievable for the upcoming week.

That allowed me to slowly build up good habits. I'd reflect on how well my attempt over the past week went.

Beside the habit forming, I found value in just reading my thoughts from the past week. It was helpful to recognize negative thoughts that persisted week to week. And I spent time thinking about ways to improve the situation. It was also helpful to recognize desires I had that I wasn't making progress on and translating those into actionable steps.

The _key_ imho is the reviewing. That helps you set yourself up for improving instead of ignoring issues and stagnating.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#229

Post by heywoodlh »

It's interesting the contrast your experience is to my own. I have dealt with anxiety my whole life but didn't really want to acknowledge it until recently. My lack of awareness helped me push through a lot but at the cost of authenticity -- which in turn affects my mental and emotional health and my relationships. So good on you for being honest with yourself about anxiety -- that's something I really suck at still.

But, as the other comments have said, breaking things down into smaller doable things have really helped me at all stages. I.E. focus on getting through one assignment or one problem in the assignment. Break things down as much as possible.

Good luck on your journey and I hope you find success.

Re: Ask HN: How to break anxiety/fear-avoidance cycle?

#230

Post by ghostbrainalpha »

pc86 wrote: post #183
ghostbrainalpha wrote: post #159

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm just like you but a little worse. I did fail out of college because of exactly that. I felt such shame at having done D work that I often wouldn't even turn it in, and then get the F. I struggled for years after dropping out with this, and still do to some extent. But came up with a crazy strategy to kind of get myself addicted to completing tasks on my To Do list. I think today I'm probably significantly more pr…

Would you be willing to share your strategy? There were a couple times where I just didn't turn something in, even if it was half done. I'm in my late 30's now and still struggle with motivation. I'll go back and forth between 8-10 hours of heads down coding in a day to maybe 30 minutes. I don't think it's burnout because I honestly can't even tell what kind of day it's going to be until it's half over.

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