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Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

news.ycombinator.com

61–70 of 85 posts

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#61
post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For providing free support, have you considered a meetup group? I run a self-compassion meetup group and it’s been a wonderful platform to create an online space for sharing emotional support together, and free for members (I pay the meetup organiser fee). It feels rewarding and meaningful to offer support out of love, not money. Just humans being caring to each other. :)

It's a good idea, but it only really works locally. And I think meeting in-person can become "too much" at times. I definitely am for this idea, but I think it only works for certain people.

It used to be local but since the pandemic, our meetup became online only.

We get people from all around the world, often without webcams so it’s like a multi-person phone call, which helps it feel more comfortable (especially when sharing vulnerable emotions).

Whichever path you choose, I wish you luck with your journey.

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#62
post #59

The funny thing about this — is that quite a lot of people can help others — while not being able to help themselves. I had a startup idea — for people in need of such help helping and motivating each other — noticing that I can solve rather complex problems of others while being a prize moron within my own code block. Didn't follow through due to d. My advice to you is: 1. Don't be discouraged if this dies in 'New',…

One of the things that i find strange and sometimes annoys me about HN is that every idea needs to be a startup... Why? Your idea could also become a collective or a non-profit the very least...

My plan was non-profit, corporate sponsorship, plus voluntarily member donations. Used the term 'startup' just because it's short for 'big complex IT project based on some assumptions'.

Besides my own issues, I simply found too many holes in my original idea — where this idyllic utopia could go wrong.

I still keep the idea on the heap — currently evaluating an idea of professionally supervised chat groups. But I'd be glad if someone steals the idea before I find every way it could lead to the extinction of koalas and collapse of the Hilbert space.

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#63
post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's a good idea, but it only really works locally. And I think meeting in-person can become "too much" at times. I definitely am for this idea, but I think it only works for certain people.

It used to be local but since the pandemic, our meetup became online only. We get people from all around the world, often without webcams so it’s like a multi-person phone call, which helps it feel more comfortable (especially when sharing vulnerable emotions). Whichever path you choose, I wish you luck with your journey.

That's really interesting!

I recently proposed an idea in a subreddit (for enneagram 9s) to see if people were interested in starting a peer-support group over zoom, webcam optional.

I don't think I'll be able to execute it as my own personal life is pretty busy, but the folks there were really enthusiastic about the idea.

So yeah your online meet up thing, that's super cool that it works!

I wouldn't mind chatting more about it if you're interested in sharing. My email's in my profile. :)

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#64

I'm very interested in this type of reading, for my situation and for others. My single post ( https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=27739957 ) details where I was 9 months ago, and things have only degraded from there. I did indeed quit my job (which was the correct decision), but never received any decent help (not for lack of trying). I've gone through many doctors and 13-15 different anti-/depressant/anxiety/ + sl…

Check out David Burn's latest book[0] about modern CBT techniques. Burns originally popularized CBT with his writing in the 80s. "Feeling Great" is an updated modern version with the latest techniques. You might find the content itself useful, or the descriptions a good guide for techniques to try with your therapist or strategies for finding a therapist you might work well with.

Sorry you've been feeling this way. Good luck!

[0] https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Great-Revolutionary-Treatment...

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#65
post #59

The funny thing about this — is that quite a lot of people can help others — while not being able to help themselves. I had a startup idea — for people in need of such help helping and motivating each other — noticing that I can solve rather complex problems of others while being a prize moron within my own code block. Didn't follow through due to d. My advice to you is: 1. Don't be discouraged if this dies in 'New',…

One of the things that i find strange and sometimes annoys me about HN is that every idea needs to be a startup... Why? Your idea could also become a collective or a non-profit the very least...

Everything looks like a nail

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#67
post #59

The funny thing about this — is that quite a lot of people can help others — while not being able to help themselves. I had a startup idea — for people in need of such help helping and motivating each other — noticing that I can solve rather complex problems of others while being a prize moron within my own code block. Didn't follow through due to d. My advice to you is: 1. Don't be discouraged if this dies in 'New',…

One of the things that i find strange and sometimes annoys me about HN is that every idea needs to be a startup... Why? Your idea could also become a collective or a non-profit the very least...

I completely agree that there are many options outside of startups, even for business ventures, and I wish this were discussed more.

However, this is a forum associated with a startup funding institution, so it's not that strange to me there would be that bias here.

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#68
post #59

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One of the things that i find strange and sometimes annoys me about HN is that every idea needs to be a startup... Why? Your idea could also become a collective or a non-profit the very least...

My plan was non-profit, corporate sponsorship, plus voluntarily member donations. Used the term 'startup' just because it's short for 'big complex IT project based on some assumptions'. Besides my own issues, I simply found too many holes in my original idea — where this idyllic utopia could go wrong. I still keep the idea on the heap — currently evaluating an idea of professionally supervised chat groups. But I'd be…

Could you please elaborate more on the business idea that you have if you don't mind?

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#69
post #60
post #55

Earlier quoted context omitted.

my thought on this is that it would be good if you at least understand what each of these professions are about so that you can recognize your limitations and understand when the person seeking help needs something more serious that you can't provide. i think what you want to do is essentially what i would consider being a good but also knowledgeable friend. a good friend tries to help where they can, but not all fri…

That's a very good point. I'm starting to realize my limitations and am thinking of doing something a bit different. But it's all good food for thought. Thank you all for your constructive feedback!

Even if you triage folks and get them to the correct "professionals", that's a hell of an added value.

I believe billing it as a "Everything else not working? Give us a try!", instead of a first line of support, could also structure the liability in a fair way.

...I even have a couple killer ideas for the name of the non-profit!

Re: Ask HN: Are you lost / confused / stuck? I can try to help

#70

I'm very interested in this type of reading, for my situation and for others. My single post ( https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=27739957 ) details where I was 9 months ago, and things have only degraded from there. I did indeed quit my job (which was the correct decision), but never received any decent help (not for lack of trying). I've gone through many doctors and 13-15 different anti-/depressant/anxiety/ + sl…

Check out David Burn's latest book[0] about modern CBT techniques. Burns originally popularized CBT with his writing in the 80s. "Feeling Great" is an updated modern version with the latest techniques. You might find the content itself useful, or the descriptions a good guide for techniques to try with your therapist or strategies for finding a therapist you might work well with. Sorry you've been feeling this way. G…

I went through the first several chapters of the book, but it didn't stick. I should try again; I see his work mentioned all over the place and how it helped people.
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