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I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

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Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#191

So, here's my story; I tell it occasionally when stories like yours come up. I had no college experience, but did manage to jump right in to a good I.T. job while I was still in high school, and from there into an even better I.T. job in another state where I made more money than I knew what to do with. (I've never been good with money, and didn't understand what "savings" meant.) I worked there until suddenly one da…

> At one point, my expenses were literally: food, and gas for the car. And that was it. I had no bank account, I got my checks cashed at the grocery store How much were you paying to cash your checks at the grocery store? This is more expensive than depositing the check in a bank or credit union (I think it's on the level of payday loans, gouging lower income because they don't understand the relative size of the fee…

  > Find new friends? That seems silly.
With friends like that, who needs enemies? I mean the guy is down in the dumps, "rock bottom" if you like, and his friends are attempting to kick him while he's down to elevate their own self-esteem a bit. And you think that this is a good set of people to be around?

Also advice like, "grow a thicker skin" to someone that's in the throes of depression, might as well be advice to, "just stop being depressed."

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#192
post #188
post #141

I did quit my full-time job. So did I. Many times. About half the time it worked out great. The other half, it sucked, just like yours does now. You are not alone. I'm constantly broke, on the verge of poverty... Then get a job, any job. It doesn't have to be programming. It'll get you out of the house, get you with other people, and put a few bucks in your pocket. If you love programming enough, you'll find time to…

Then get a job, any job. It doesn't have to be programming. It'll get you out of the house, get you with other people, and put a few bucks in your pocket. If you love programming enough, you'll find time to keep it going on the side. Totally second the "any job" part. I'd go as far as to say try to do something that isn't programming. Speaking from experience, sometimes the reason freelancing isn't going so well is s…

You may also find that working in an area unrelated to computers you'll find an idea for a project or niche business that will work. There are lots of businesses that need engineers and programmers to help them but can't figure out where to look first.

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#193

Everyone seems to be posting long, drawn-out responses to everything you said, but I just want to touch on one point. You're twenty years old. Maybe quitting your job was a bad move, maybe it was a good move that you just can't see the bright side of yet, but in any event you've got plenty of time to figure out what to do. And, bonus, you know what financial hardship is like. I know a lot of folks that won't take big…

Agreed. 20 years is nothing. Assuming he doesn't have a wife and kids he has nothing to worry about. Plenty of time ahead for improvements, which mostly comes from learning more diverse things AND networking more.

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#194
How about make a game about your situation? You seem to be emotionally charged enough so why not channel it into something that may lead you to other ideas?

Stick with college and finish up - you might stumble onto something that fits. And if not, at least you have a that piece of paper, which I used to think it was to impress people but really it's so the glaring absence of a degree doesn't jump out.

That said, you don't HAVE to finish. It will buy you time to discover, investigate other paths.

Back to the game idea, how about make the game about the future of your next 10 years?

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#195

So, here's my story; I tell it occasionally when stories like yours come up. I had no college experience, but did manage to jump right in to a good I.T. job while I was still in high school, and from there into an even better I.T. job in another state where I made more money than I knew what to do with. (I've never been good with money, and didn't understand what "savings" meant.) I worked there until suddenly one da…

> At one point, my expenses were literally: food, and gas for the car. And that was it. I had no bank account, I got my checks cashed at the grocery store How much were you paying to cash your checks at the grocery store? This is more expensive than depositing the check in a bank or credit union (I think it's on the level of payday loans, gouging lower income because they don't understand the relative size of the fee…

When your credit is shot banks are really reluctant to take you on as a new account. He probably owes his current bank tons of money so probably doesn't want to deposit his only income there. Opening a new account requires a background check (when I opened mine they told me it was to verify I wasn't blacklisted from writing checks) and possibly a credit check.

Sometimes the check cashing store is your only choice. And they aren't all bad. They may get you on the check cashing fee, but a ding at a regular bank can put you in an even worse position ($29 overdraft fee, $35 NSF fees).

The check cashing stores are popular in poor areas because these people may only get $200-400/month and charge $5-20. It's a fixed cost that anyone can factor in quickly. Keeping a mental register of how much you have in the bank is harder than knowing what's exactly in your wallet.

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#197
I appreciate this post. I've been contemplating quitting my job for a few years now in order to focus on my business. I'm 36 years old. I have a steady IT job, which I like. And a side business which is my love. I often think that if I quit my job, the pain and hunger would force me to launch my side business into full throttle.

However, I am able to work on my side business while I have a day job, so I've been doing both for the past few years.

It's hard to say whether my side business would have blown up huge by now. But I can tell you that dragging that business along at half throttle does wear down your enthusiasm for it.

Anyway, I appreciate the 'other' side of all the 'quit your job' rancor. I suspect a lot of that comes from people who were successful who are trumpeting that success. And the people for whom it doesn't work out... well... you don't see enough of those people talking about it like you have.

Hope it all works out for you.

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#198
post #117

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This comment completely misses the point about depression. A person who is actually depressed is likely to need assistance navigating out of that state. Being smart etc. isn't the cure.

I agree smartness isn't sufficient for a cure, and sometimes drugs are necessary, but neither is just "talking to someone" which is what Befrienders states: "We work worldwide to provide emotional support, and reduce suicide. We listen to people who are in distress. We don't judge them or tell them what to do - we listen." I'm certain what they do is a good idea but I think it's just a cached piece of advice that wor…

No, just no. Having a sympathetic person listen and provide good advice can be extremely valuable. And these things do not require anything but the attention of someone who cares, who maybe has gone through the same thing. These people are not few and far between, and they are not random.

Also, therapists cannot prescribe drugs. No one with the ability to write a prescription calls themselves a therapist. And I seriously doubt that anyone who can prescribe drugs gets paid a commission for doing so. That would almost certainly be considered a massive ethics violation.

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#199
A couple things:

Fathers

It's funny how fathers react to being entrepreneurial, especially if they are the one-job-for-life kind of guy. I have had the same problem in the past with my father, and he always says that I should stay where I am, in the same job, until I retire. However, on the job front I'm a nomadic person and he just doesn't understand that. But then again, I can't understand his world either.

The best thing to do is to sit down and talk with each other and try to educate yourselves on what it's like living in the other's shoes. He probably has the best intentions, but when lacking a frame of reference any argument can come off as just complaining.

Depression

Everyone gets depressed about their situation. But you wouldn't believe what kind of echo chamber you have between your ears. The worst thing you can do is to constantly listen to yourself, because you'll just churn the same though (usually bad) over and over in your head, and it never gets better. Sometimes, it takes a metaphorical slap to the side of the head (or a literal one, if that's your thing) from someone else before you snap out of it. Go out and talk to your peers. Don't talk to your parents or siblings about it, but rather people who aren't there to spare your feelings.

Difficulty

I completely agree that freelancing and entrepreurship is difficult. It's not something we learn in public school, and not everyone majors in business in college. That said, you're 20 so don't beat yourself up about it. From what I read, you don't have any strings attached to your life (mortgage, wife, child) so you can bounce back very easily. It'd also be easy for you to study and get those diplomas, especially the high school one.

This may sound harsh, but failing to get a high school diploma (where they only seem to hand them out these days to everything with a pulse) is pathetic. It's the single easiest thing you can do to make sure your resume doesn't get tossed in the bin. School is important. You may not think so, but your employer does. And school is one of those things where you don't realize you are using it, so it's not fair to yourself to say that you don't need to learn X or Y because it's not relevant to you right now.

Re: I quit my job last March and it was a bad idea.

#200
post #141

I did quit my full-time job. So did I. Many times. About half the time it worked out great. The other half, it sucked, just like yours does now. You are not alone. I'm constantly broke, on the verge of poverty... Then get a job, any job. It doesn't have to be programming. It'll get you out of the house, get you with other people, and put a few bucks in your pocket. If you love programming enough, you'll find time to…

edw519 is always gold.

Also, you're 20. I'm twice your age and I've made far more serious mistakes at your age that have had minimal negative impact on my life. Don't fear life.

You're young and free, don't sweat it and certainly don't get depressed about failures. You have plenty of life left to use what you've learned from them to succeed.

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