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Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

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Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#271

Post by devwastaken »

To me it sounds that you've put your career first, and now that you've essentially beaten that game you're lost on what to do next. A lot of engineers switch to doing other things they like, an ex Microsoft dev made their own winery using their skills. A number of them just work on pet projects. Or a lot of people transition more into their community. - is there a high school or people to mentor? In education especially in rural areas it's hard to come by people with experience.

Travel, meet people, enjoy good food, do drift racing, life is what you want out of it.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#274

Post by tomc1985 »

czbond wrote: post #98
thiago_fm wrote: post #70

Sorry you feel that way, I'll try to be frank here, if my advice isn't useful, just don't take it. I know a few people exactly like you, that like to boost about how well off they are and that are depressed and sad, but they treat life as it is a game of competition, this is why they usually start by displaying how "they've won", but in reality they were the only ones that were silly enough to only think about work.…

> but in reality they were the only ones that were silly enough to only think about work A lot of people find passion + work align. It's ok not to waste your time watching TV, sports, playing games, art, and all that stuff people do to distract them from life. It is ok for your hobby to be work. There are just enough people who aren't driven to work, that it bothers them. I can work 10 hours every day, and enjoy work…

> Life is boring - if you're in charge of work, it can be fulfilling.

Life is quite exciting with the right social group. Work is inevitably drudging away while an employer takes 98% of your output for themselves and gives you table scraps in return.

This is coming from somebody who turned his hobbies + passion into his work, and then narrowly avoided hardcore burnout after he realized the industry sucked and that the only things that matter to it are that which can be sacrificed at the altar of naked capitalism. That it is filled with a million idiots that all think they're right and are supervised by slovenly magpies that pour gas on whatever fire gets them the most KPI points with their superiors.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#275

Post by chrisgd »

As for health insurance, you should look into Direct Primary Care. Sort of like concierge medicine for all where you can pay a family fee and then add a catastrophe plan on top. Would likely allow you to lower your health expenses significantly, see a primary care physician more often or for longer visits and stay on top of your health. Could point you in a direction for depression treatments? Might free you from having to keep a job for insurance.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#276

Post by theuri »

Spend 4 days doing Unleash the Power Within. I was skeptical, but put my full effort into it and held back my cynicism. Ignore the annoying marketing/hype machine around it -- the actual content and the experience (when approached wholeheartedly) are awesome. Change your state, change your life.

https://www.upwvirtual.com/

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#278

Post by p0wn »

To me it sounds like you've successfully dedicated your life to making money, but money is not a pursuit that brings any happiness. It seems like you need to find a purpose in life that isn't making money, having a wife, raising kids, etc. Some true self identity. Try new things until you find something new you want to master and pursue it. Make some time for it.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#280

Post by digisign »

Sounds like you completed your first plan. Having one is good, but not worth worrying about. We all live a short while, then wither away and die, if we're one of the lucky ones. Get used to it.

Personally, I'd spend some portion of my time having fun. Then I'd spend another portion trying to improve the world and help those around me.

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