Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

I need to stop being boring

patzhong.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

101–110 of 258 posts

Re: I need to stop being boring

#101

Post by gigaflop »

PragmaticPulp wrote: post #47

> I lost my creativity and the sense of wonder I used to have in childhood. I am no longer curious because I am settled for the world as it is. I accept things the way they are instead of imagining how they could be. I was starting to feel this way before I had kids, but having kids completely changed everything for the more interesting. It’s funny because it’s the exact opposite of what I was told would happen: The…

I'm on the fence about having kids, but this all is one of the things that makes me consider them. It's going to depend on the partner I end up with, but I feel like I might end up making spending time my kids into one of my 'hobbies'.

I mean, they're right there, you already know them, and get to show them all sorts of new and fascinating things?

Re: I need to stop being boring

#102

Post by jermaustin1 »

JKCalhoun wrote: post #86
rr808 wrote: post #40

I'm afraid most tech people need to get out more. The job is hard, side projects are fun and you need to leetcode in your spare time to get a job. However its very easy to be boring. People benefit from making non-tech friends, play sports, travel, read novels, learn about spirituality, make music, build furniture but I dont see a lot of that happening. I'm a corporate cog and its my biggest regret.

Get out and do boring things. Your mind will fill up the dead-space with creative ideas. Go on walks. Hike. Go on long road trips.

walking, hiking, and road tripping are my favorite things to do (walk daily, "hike" (just long walk since I live in flat Houston) weekly, and roadtrip monthly). And the entire time, I sit in silence just THINKING.

Sometimes I record my thoughts out loud. But for the most time, I just use it as a way to keep my mind churning. Sometimes I come up with new side projects, or a design for a new piece of furniture, or just wonder on certain things (friends/family, state of the world, the guy that coughed on me at the restaurant).

Re: I need to stop being boring

#103

Post by boh »

There's something obviously wrong in assuming some blanket "creativity" will satisfy whatever needs you may have, but popular cultural heuristics makes it seem right. Just as "innovation" is the solution for every problem, somehow divorcing yourself from your natural inclinations and increasing your risk is the right way to go. What is it the writer wants exactly? Some unknown nirvana of personal expression where you get to escape "the world as it is" and submerge into a childish "sense of wonder"?

Accepting reality is often expressed as settling into some depressing malaise, while "imagining" something "better" is the more proactive, positive choice by default. I will make a bet that whatever spurt of creative "not boring" thing the writer does next will distract for some time and then they will be right back where they started from.

The world needs more people capable of dealing with "the world as it is" and make the boring choice of taking responsibility for it. It's doing the long, boring, thankless tasks that this requires, instead of flailing around in the shallow depths of narcissistic self-actualization, that grants purpose and meaning to what you do. Don't let culture bully you into it's incoherent projections of success and relevance. Being committed,consistent, focused and responsible is boring. Be boring.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#104

Post by nabnob »

Something that helped me dramatically in this area was picking up a new hobby, purely for fun, with no expectations about getting "good" at it or winning any praise or accolades - for me, this was dance. It's taught me how to be creative and where creative energy actually comes from, and i've been able to take this skill and apply it to other hobbies, like music, where my approach used to be more technical. Extrinsic motivation and having expectations seem to kill creativity.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#105

Post by 65 »

lloydatkinson wrote: post #35
napolux wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

2022 and we still have to see WordPress Database Errors.

2022 and developers still use Wordpress for what could be a static blog site

And pay for Wordpress sites too! I have a static Next.js site hosted on S3 and I don't pay anything to host it.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#106

Post by Aeolun »

v-erne wrote: post #92
lupire wrote: post #64

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When you are four years old, you lose your memories of the first years of your life. When you have kids, you live them again.

Sure and then You forget them again. When I look at my 9 year old I cannot recall at all what she used to be at 4.

I have enough (well, not really, but that’s water under the bridge now) video’s of my now 3 year old being 1 year old. They help me remember.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#107

Post by mattjaynes »

"Only boring people get bored" was maybe the best advice I ever got.

I was a teenager and was getting a ride home from a friend of the family.

He asked "How's life going"

And I was in the midst of answering "It's bor.."

But he cut me off and said "Don't say 'it's boring'. ONLY BORING PEOPLE GET BORED."

It was like a splash of cold water in my face, and I always remembered that.

Whenever I start feeling bored now, I remind myself of that quote and start mentally exploring ways to shake things up and break out of the rut. If my mind isn't feeling that creative, then I start looking at what others are doing in my situation and often I'll find some thread of their creativity that I can use to get myself started.

The more you fear being labeled as "boring", the more motivated you'll be to avoid those doldrums.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#108

Post by redleggedfrog »

Oh man, no worries, I'm boring too! It's great! I do things like take 20 year old XML exports and build a modern data transfer services around them. Doing these kinds of things I make a lot of money being boring. No pretensions, work 8 to 5, I'm not my work, and I go home to my wife and we have loads of fun cooking, playing boardgames, riding our ebikes, camping, now even having friends over again. Boring rocks!

Maybe the problem is all work and no play?

Re: I need to stop being boring

#110

Post by gigaflop »

JKCalhoun wrote: post #83
PragmaticPulp wrote: post #47

> I lost my creativity and the sense of wonder I used to have in childhood. I am no longer curious because I am settled for the world as it is. I accept things the way they are instead of imagining how they could be. I was starting to feel this way before I had kids, but having kids completely changed everything for the more interesting. It’s funny because it’s the exact opposite of what I was told would happen: The…

Same. Children become vessels for my vicariousness. Everything is still new to them, and I get to see the world with new eyes again through them.

I feel like if I ever end up curious about a hobby or activity, that I could introduce it first to my hypothetical kids.

I get to keep the kids busy, see if they have fun with something, and judge if it's something I'd personally enjoy. If we both end up liking it, then great! Something more to share with them.

Post reply on HN