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I need to stop being boring

patzhong.com

11–20 of 258 posts

Re: I need to stop being boring

#11
I don't think you're boring but I do think your brain is feeling cheated for putting in all this work over and over and not getting the dopamine rewards for it afterwards (which in most cases is often praise or money).

I think you need some small wins to keep your motivation going. I read this quote here on hacker news which was very eye opening for me at the time(1). This idealogy of using small wins while you're chasing a big win has helped me a lot when things aren't going your way. I'm a indie hacker too would be happy to tell you some strategies I've developed for creating small wins (though most of them are very specific to my product / industry so I can't say how useful it would be to you)

(1) https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5630618

Re: I need to stop being boring

#12

After doing programming and being involved in startups for well over a decade, I decided I don't actually like coding nor startups anymore. I still have a company I run with my partners, and I still treat it like my 'job', but there's no passion there. Instead, I've discovered writing novels, music, and other artsy-fartsy stuff as my new passion of the last few years (it had always been a hobby, but I'm taking it muc…

Reconnecting with artsy-fartsy stuff I did when I was 16/17 has been fantastic.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#13
post #3

After doing programming and being involved in startups for well over a decade, I decided I don't actually like coding nor startups anymore. I still have a company I run with my partners, and I still treat it like my 'job', but there's no passion there. Instead, I've discovered writing novels, music, and other artsy-fartsy stuff as my new passion of the last few years (it had always been a hobby, but I'm taking it muc…

"If you aren't bored, you aren't boring." I really love this advice. Thank you.

People who read HN during a dinner for two aren't bored, but they are boring.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#14

I'm glad the author is introspecting, but I think this is a bit of a misdiagnosis, or maybe an incomplete prescription. First, being boring to others is nothing to worry about -- let them attend to their own likes and dislikes -- it's not your job to thrill anyone. But the author seems to be using boring to describe being limited by fears of various kinds. Well, that's right, it's not good to be bullied and caged by…

The first two pages took up my whole screen, and for a second I thought I had achieved enlightenment. Alas, ink appears page 3.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#16
> So what went wrong? My gut feeling is that I am boring.

A lot of pain seems to come from a poor vocabulary about feelings. What is boring? It's a weak and flattened word like the feelings it's used about.

Do you mean avolition, acedia, irascibility, dissatisfaction, insensibility, repression, discouragement, ambivalence, anxiety? The Psychology of the Emotions by Neal Burton is a fair place to continue the introspective journey you've started [1].

> I lost my creativity and the sense of wonder I used to have in childhood. I am no longer curious because I am settled for the world as it is. I accept things the way they are instead of imagining how they could be.

Comfortably Numb. There's a dose of it going around. Don't worry it's an acute condition. All progress depends upon the unreasonable man. You need to stop being reasonable. Take a good look at the world, and notice there's still plenty to be really, healthily angry about, and so much to be joyously in love with. Just don't give in to ambivalence or settle for the illusion of comfort and safety life seems to be showing you. Take a risk on it.

[1] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hide-and-seek/201601...

Re: I need to stop being boring

#17
Having a negative goal isn't recommended according to something I read somewhere.

You're meant to frame personal objectives in positive terms. Instead of "stop eating junk food", "start eating healthier food". Instead of "stop being lazy", "exercise every day".

Instead of "stop being boring", the objective might be to read more books, or a million other things that result in interesting people.

Also his app is built on the premise that we get distracted easily and can't focus. The success of the app therefore relies on the failure of others. Perhaps a better project is one where the app doesn't start with "you suck, now sign up and you won't suck as much". I'm possibly being unfair. I'm just thinking of ways this dude can make less boring apps.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#18

> So what went wrong? My gut feeling is that I am boring. A lot of pain seems to come from a poor vocabulary about feelings. What is boring? It's a weak and flattened word like the feelings it's used about. Do you mean avolition, acedia, irascibility, dissatisfaction, insensibility, repression, discouragement, ambivalence, anxiety? The Psychology of the Emotions by Neal Burton is a fair place to continue the introspe…

And then you learn about survivorship bias.

Re: I need to stop being boring

#19
Being creative is not a good thing for business success. It is better to take a well-known thing and put a little bit of your own spin to it or simply to combine two popular things.

If you create anything truly revolutionary it will be an uphill battle. You wont be able to communicate what you product does in just a few words. Worse it will require potential customers to actual make a mental shift. You will have lost their attention before you can even get to the benefits. This is why the first one to develop something new will rarely see success, only those later that copy it when the ground work has already been laid.

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