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How to work with me

davidbauer.ch

161–170 of 225 posts

Re: How to work with me

#161
post #78

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Exactly, it would be more valuable if the manual said things like: "I can come across as a dick sometimes but that is because I like to test certain stances on issues by vigorously defending them, I assure you I'm open to changing my mind if you just keep pushing, actually I feel like you are taking my intelligence more serious if you do. Not many people appreciate this, but somehow discussion makes me feel good" or…

Or you could just sum it all up as "I'm deeply unpleasant, and I'd say that I'm sorry that you have to work with me, but I actually don't have any interest in your emotional state."

:) Well, there is a kernel of truth in all of them, but I think my colleagues are quite fond of me nonetheless. I think that I have my analytical mind to thank for that more than my innate capacity for detecting and dealing with emotions in others though (never mind my own).

Re: How to work with me

#162
post #5

no person ever will want read this page ...and no mentally stable person ever needs to write a page like this this just screams "i'm a narcissist, these are my rules. wanna talk to me? obey the rules!"

> no mentally stable person

I think that sort of judgement breaks HN guidelines: https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html

Re: How to work with me

#163

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thanks for the feedback on humble, hungry, and smart. Tbh I do find that most people at Loom exhibit all 3 of these traits, but I could definitely be totally off due to people likely changing their behavior whenever I'm in a room or having a conversation with them (e.g. people on their best behavior). > As for humility: you will not find it in most sub 40 year olds, they don't know what they don't know yet This is in…

I don't know the other people at Loom, so I'm modeling you after your typical scale-up with talented young people, the likes of which I see every other week or so on average, but it is definitely possible that Loom is in a different order all by itself. Also, keep in mind that my viewpoint is Euro-centric and that just that alone could easily qualify to make up the difference. As for terminology, eager might be a bet…

We hire people in the EU, so I definitely want your perspective!

> As for terminology, eager might be a better term than hungry. So funny, I associate eager more with "desperate". Maybe this is a US vs. EU sorta thing. I'm going to noodle on this - thank you!

Re: How to work with me

#164
While the idea is interesting, I imagine this would increase the friction in team interactions. And if everyone in the team have their own "manual" (which is only fair), you pretty much need a cheat sheet just to keep up. To me, that takes away the spontaneity in interactions, which is something I'm sure we all sorely miss after two years of lockdowns.

Re: How to work with me

#166
Like many others I don't love the idea of a "How to work with me" manual because -- like much of this one -- they can come off as a one-way directive. However, context matters.

If a random person on my team or the manager of some other team handed this to me? No, no, and no. Huge red flag. But if I was joining a team for the first time and my manager handed me a manual of expectations and made it clear what they value, what they expect, and how they see the world, that would be a treasure trove for my career. After all, managing my career is essentially managing my manager.

That being said, this document... isn't that. I appreciate the intent, but like many have said, it can be a little self-indulgent :)

Re: How to work with me

#167
> We wouldn’t be here, working together, if one of us could do it on their own.

Interesting belief. I don't actually think it holds true in a lot of situations, certainly at least many 'work/employment' situations I've been.

Re: How to work with me

#168
The title may come across as arrogant, but when you read it, it's very empathetic.

You might as well sum it up as "be nice and reasonable, and don't waste each other's time".

Re: How to work with me

#169

Aside from the reflexive “yikes, dude” that this gives me, I wouldn’t trust the content itself. A manual written by someone who’s worked with you for years would be far more valuable. But my first impression of a person who hands me something like this is going to be “what past interpersonal disasters have you wrought that led you to put time into something like this?” …case in point is a current coworker of mine, wh…

I think there's an important distinction between this and one post the author mentions he was inspired by, the "How to Rands" post [1]. From How to Rands: > The following is a user guide for me and how I work. It captures what you can expect out of the average week working with me, how I like to work, my north star principles, and some of my, uh, nuance. My intent is to accelerate our working relationship with this d…

[deleted]

Re: How to work with me

#170
I would 1) rename it to "how I work with you" and 2) reframe it like that

Make it "you-focused" toward colleagues. A lot of the pushback this is receiving here is because it's "me-focused" about OP.

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