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How to work with me

davidbauer.ch

111–120 of 225 posts

Re: How to work with me

#111
Sadly, this strikes me as a document that was initially as egocentric as the title implies, but was later groomed and manicured to be more palatable. The match/replace "we" language is there to support this.

Re: How to work with me

#112
post #19

I was hoping this would be more like a car or airplane manual. “Failure to maintain adequate vitamin C levels may cause scurvy. Go to service center if this happens. Maintain blood pressure within limits (see specifications).” Etc.

might have to write this now, that's hilarious lol

Re: How to work with me

#113
Hey, David! I'm surprised by how many people seem to be confused or irritated by you sharing this. I'm imagining that some people are hearing a demand that they have to read it, and then they're obliged to do as you prefer. And I also see you replying with a cheerful "Thanks!" to comments which I find myself judging as discompassionate. That inspires me. So I just wanted to say that it seems to me like you really value clear communication, collaboration, and trust, and that this document is your attempt at meeting those needs.

Would you say this is an accurate reflection of what you wanted to express sharing it here? Would love to hear it.

Re: How to work with me

#114
post #69

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've skimmed your post, and I honestly feel like the content is not the main issue here, but the fact that it was written and published. You could share how you prefer to interact with people if the need arises , preferably by addressing them directly about the points that are relevant for your interactions, and without giving them the impression that you've handed in a list of preferences.

That's a good point, yes. I didn't intend to publish it first, but put it out there to learn from the feedback I'm getting. It's interesting how differently people who don't know me (see this entire discussion here) react compared to people who know me or have worked with me before. That's super helpful since future co-workers will most likely fall in the first group.

Whatever you do, please leave it up. Documents like this are extremely valuable red flags for future coworkers.

Re: How to work with me

#115

Aside from the reflexive “yikes, dude” that this gives me, I wouldn’t trust the content itself. A manual written by someone who’s worked with you for years would be far more valuable. But my first impression of a person who hands me something like this is going to be “what past interpersonal disasters have you wrought that led you to put time into something like this?” …case in point is a current coworker of mine, wh…

I know there are some who do these things with honest intents, but I must agree with you based on experience...

I saw this primarily with managers and higher-ups who clearly used this as some form of pre-emptive signaling device, kinda like a Twitter Bio. It's creating a paper trail that serves your narrative in performance reviews, often indirectly through priming or "anchoring" people with an early impression. It ticks all the boxes – yet it doesn't come in a format that's usually under scrutiny – "why would anyone deceive in a user manual?". It's catnip for middle management.

Re: How to work with me

#117
> We can’t be successful together if we’re aiming for different outcomes. If one of us feels our goals or motives aren’t aligned, we need to talk.

That is actually not true. When building a team it is important to learn what each individual seeks out of the "project". For example your goal might be to use the project as a way to get promoted. I might not care at all about getting promoted and instead my goal is to learn new stuff. Our colleague might be using the project as a way to push some new technology into broader acceptance in the company. Our other colleagues goal might be to bail half way through because they never wanted to be on the project in the first place. All four of us have different motivations and personal goals for this project--and that is totally okay!

It isn't a good idea to assume everybody has the same goal. It is a good idea to at least address this in the beginnings of team building. Knowing that you are trying to get a promo out of this would help me help you get that promo.

Re: How to work with me

#119

Can anyone here give me an honest review of the doc I send people who reach out to me who I don't know? I definitely want to know if this doc comes off as condescending. https://vinay.notion.site/If-you-want-to-work-with-me-at-Loo...

Given that this is a completely different context, one where someone is still outside the org and trying to get your attention to become their advocate it is a totally different vibe from TFA.

I don't see how 'humble, hungry and smart' will go together in most applicants, you'll be lucky to have one out of three, extremely happy to get two and all three is usually a question of broken self assessment.

Adding 'hungry' also seems to select for people in need, giving you an advantage over them in negotiations. As for humility: you will not find it in most sub 40 year olds, they don't know what they don't know yet. So this might cause good candidates to back out.

Finally, the extra heading 'We cannot hire within these countries' is superfluous, it is already covered by the previous heading.

hth.

Re: How to work with me

#120
post #68

Worth linking to Richard Stallman's rider: https://gizmodo.com/please-do-not-buy-richard-stallman-a-par...

At least Richard Stallman is an actual celebrity, of sorts, and goes on lecture tours. Have you seen the riders of big bands? They are formatted exactly the same way; do this, don’t do this, etc. People who have never seen these kinds of documents assume instead a personal relationship context, where this kind of language would be horrifying. But this would be assuming a personal relationship, where this is instead aimed at more business-like relationship of hoster and featured speaker. This document should be compared to the likes of “no brown M&Ms”.
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