How to work with me: Grab a beer (or your favorite drink). Tilt back, enjoy the sun.
How to work with me
81–90 of 225 posts
Re: How to work with me
#82Re: How to work with me
#83If I received this I would do my best to steer clear of this person. Hopefully you put at least as much effort into acquiring social skills as telling people exactly how to communicate with you.
Re: How to work with me
#84I will not work with you!!! You should include this document in a job interview to help waste applicants time.
Re: How to work with me
#85My boss at my previous company created one of these with the intention of being “helpful”. It basically stated you should address me in this manner, use this form of communication etc. I asked him if he would be ok with me also creating a similar user manual telling him how I should be communicated with. He said it would be ok, as long as it did not contradict his user manual. IMO, these seem to me to be a friendly w…
Tongue-in-cheek title aside, I really do believe that it's helpful if a lot of people do write down some sort of user manual for themselves. These can be a great starting point for having conversations on how to best work together and spot potential areas of conflict in advance. In no way should these be seen as dictating the rules.
I probably wouldn't call it a "user manual" since that implies a list of the "correct" way to work with a person. Why not just call it a list of personal values (and preferences)?
Re: How to work with me
#86I think it would be more useful if it were more concise and practical.
> tl;dr Trust + Ownership + Mindful communication = Win
the tl;dr doesn't tell you anything.
The rest tries to reform the other person rather than indicate preferences. I would be more ok with one that says: - I prefer emails to meetings. Don't invite me to meetings that could be emails - I decline meetings without an agenda. - respect my time and don't double book me. If you double book me, I may not come, dont act surprised. - I voice my opinions and sometimes it might sound harsh. You can voice yours and I won't take it personally
Re: How to work with me
#87Earlier quoted context omitted.
Seems like you were trying to be sarcastic but you did just derive basic respect toward other people.
Quoted post unavailable.
Wow, I’m gobsmacked at your example. Are you really arguing that transgender people are somehow abusing and disrespecting others by asking to be acknowledged as they wish to be? Would you be ‘abused’ if I mentioned my same-sex spouse and it violated your assumed reality?
Re: How to work with me
#88I like it. Not 100% sure if this person is really like that (which seems nice), or if this is Sheldon Cooper.
Re: How to work with me
#89We did these at a previous company. I liked it in theory. In practice, though, it created way too much mental load and I often felt distracted by it. The ultimate challenge seems to stem from the "direction of need" when actual business needs to happen.
When somebody has a challenge and is reaching out, it adds an unnecessary level of complexity for them to communicate their problem while translating it into the form that the receiver prefers. Often, the reason they're reaching out in the first place is a lack of understanding about a problem. Adding the translation step often makes it harder for them to communicate, rather than more effective.
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I've also found that these documents both conflict with reality and are made redundant by people's actions.
* When people are writing these, they often write them from an aspirational aspect. They view their preferences through the way they'd ideally like to work, rather than the way they actually work.
* The major relationship pieces in these working with me docs become extremely obvious quickly.
As a manager, I enjoy these for new hires. They help me calibrate, but over time it simply becomes about the relationship and history that you've built up.
Re: How to work with me
#90To me, it seems a little condescending to be told how to act toward someone. On some level it is helpful to know your teammates, but on the other hand it can come across as self centered, like you think you're special and require special instructions for interacting with. I'm sure you have good intentions in creating this, but if someone gave this to me I would instantly thing "oh man this person is going to be high…
I did not get that impression from the text at all — I wonder whether it was revised or whether it is because I am Swiss myself so maybe it fits within MY norms.
In particular, I did not get the impression that the text makes any demands from co-workers that the author would not mutually grant them himself.
Can you point out specific examples of language you found self centered or high maintenance?