Using strangers as unwitting tools in your own psychological therapy without their consent seems super sketchy to me.
You're just not thinking rationally enough.
What does "thinking rationally" mean in this context?
Rejection Therapy (2011)
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Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#22Earlier quoted context omitted.
Empathy is not being obsessive with the feelings of others. Others are as real people as you are. If you go that way, thinking of what others feel instead of empathizing with what they're experiencing, this immediately becomes an abstraction and you fail to realize the humanity, or lack of, in this.
It's not a binary. Becoming more indifferent to other people is necessary for the kind of people who go through this sort of therapy. To open your mouth and speak to another person is to risk offending them. There are people who are so afraid of that possibility that they never speak. In that case, less empathy/more indifference is good.
First of all, thanks for engaging. It's nice to think this through with the help of others.
That being said, I have an issue with this being called 'therapy'. It may as well be, if we just think about the person receiving the benefit. However, it's a bit predatory through the lense of the other person.
But it's like you said. It's not binary. Yes, it bothers me a little. Nonetheless, as with everything, it may have its uses.
Again, thanks for your comments.
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#23This is a tragedy of the commons scenario that will ultimately lead to people being less friendly. Right now it's assumed that if someone comes up to ask you for something, they have a good reason.
Jesus Christ, why so much hand-wringing? MLM salesmen exist, religious prostheletizers exist, weird people exist. We manage to stay friendly regardless, even towards those people who often open their conversation with something dishonest to hide their true intent. Society isn't going to be altered by some wave of asking-for-favors fad. It's all perfectly fine.
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#24Using strangers as unwitting tools in your own psychological therapy without their consent seems super sketchy to me.
I feel like I use strangers as unwitting tools in my own psychological therapy all the time, but yes here it's sketchy because rejecting someone (the intended response) is an unpleasant activity.
Perhaps those people who suffer rejecting-unpleasantness should do their own therapy where they go around rejecting people's requests!
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#25This is a tragedy of the commons scenario that will ultimately lead to people being less friendly. Right now it's assumed that if someone comes up to ask you for something, they have a good reason.
Jesus Christ, why so much hand-wringing? MLM salesmen exist, religious prostheletizers exist, weird people exist. We manage to stay friendly regardless, even towards those people who often open their conversation with something dishonest to hide their true intent. Society isn't going to be altered by some wave of asking-for-favors fad. It's all perfectly fine.
>MLM salesmen exist, religious prostheletizers exist, weird people exist.
Those three groups contribute substantially to what people expect when they meet a stranger in public and adding more disingenuous possibilities would make it worse.
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#26Similar to what the famous psychologist Albert Ellis did: "As an adolescent, Albert was extremely shy around ladies. At age 19, he started showing signs of thinking like a cognitive-behavioral therapist by forcing himself to talk to about 100 women in the Bronx Botanical Gardens within a period of one month. This helped him get rid of his fear of rejection by women."[1] "He found 130 women sitting alone that month on…
>"Nobody took out a stiletto and cut my balls off" -- I've always loved that expression.
I think the modern era equivalent would be having your picture taken and posted on social media with the intent of shaming you. I cannot say for sure whether it's more likely to happen, but posting a pic on twitter is significantly easier than mutilating someone with a dagger.
It'd be interesting to see how this would work out today.
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#27Earlier quoted context omitted.
I feel like I use strangers as unwitting tools in my own psychological therapy all the time, but yes here it's sketchy because rejecting someone (the intended response) is an unpleasant activity.
Perhaps those people who suffer rejecting-unpleasantness should do their own therapy where they go around rejecting people's requests!
They could go into stores and wander seemingly helpless around, to be asked whether they need help.
This could be discouraging towards “new” employees though. Maybe they should walk around and learn getting rejected… oh well
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#28Similar to what the famous psychologist Albert Ellis did: "As an adolescent, Albert was extremely shy around ladies. At age 19, he started showing signs of thinking like a cognitive-behavioral therapist by forcing himself to talk to about 100 women in the Bronx Botanical Gardens within a period of one month. This helped him get rid of his fear of rejection by women."[1] "He found 130 women sitting alone that month on…
>"Nobody took out a stiletto and cut my balls off" -- I've always loved that expression. I think the modern era equivalent would be having your picture taken and posted on social media with the intent of shaming you. I cannot say for sure whether it's more likely to happen, but posting a pic on twitter is significantly easier than mutilating someone with a dagger. It'd be interesting to see how this would work out to…
Sure that could theoretically happen, but so what? Some people you don't know make fun of you for being awkward. It's not the end of the world!
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#29Similar to what the famous psychologist Albert Ellis did: "As an adolescent, Albert was extremely shy around ladies. At age 19, he started showing signs of thinking like a cognitive-behavioral therapist by forcing himself to talk to about 100 women in the Bronx Botanical Gardens within a period of one month. This helped him get rid of his fear of rejection by women."[1] "He found 130 women sitting alone that month on…
>"Nobody took out a stiletto and cut my balls off" -- I've always loved that expression. I think the modern era equivalent would be having your picture taken and posted on social media with the intent of shaming you. I cannot say for sure whether it's more likely to happen, but posting a pic on twitter is significantly easier than mutilating someone with a dagger. It'd be interesting to see how this would work out to…
>> It'd be interesting to see how this would work out today.
Start after work today. Report in next month when you've tried 100 times.
Re: Rejection Therapy (2011)
#30Earlier quoted context omitted.
My psychologist suggested I partake in 1 act of kindness every day, doesn't matter if in favor of a loved one or a stranger. This was to help me deal with some mental problems I had. Following this advice in multiple occasions I actively helped people on the streets, be it by helping them put the groceries in their cars or by taking something that fell off their pockets. I would say this helped me immensely, would yo…
It gets complicated, doesn't it? I mean, in your example, you're doing things that help people, vs. the author creating social pressure to do unreasonable things, but in either case, you're both still pulling people out of their comfort zone without their consent. The way society works vs. community makes all of these things ethically difficult. Communities get built when people step out of their comfort zones and he…
I'm not sure how social
alienation (everybody just pretending each other don't exist) can be framed as a good thing for keeping society together. In my eyes, it's an extremely negative side effect of economic individualism. We'd be better off if we were all a bit more connected to the people around us.