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Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

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Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#241

Post by barbazoo »

wincy wrote: post #202
MrsPeaches wrote: post #141

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The joy of a child This is such a cliche that it almost meaningless but the JOY of a child is just insane. To have some around who is almost always happy to see you (and super pissed when you go away), initially at least, is just wonderful to be around. To me at least parenting is one of the most complete human experiences. It's joyous and terrifying, exciting and mundane, just all of the things at once. It's not f…

I agree and think there’s definitely some receptor or activation in the brain for happiness or cuteness that happens that wasn’t available before having children. We had cats when our first daughter was born and coming home from the hospital it’s like what was previously a 10 in cuteness (our cats) became like a 7 and our kids cuteness level was an 11. It was bizarre and amazing and immediately noticeable to me and m…

I would love to have co-slept when ours was little but we were pretty anxious about accidentally hurting them. Maybe next time.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#242

Post by Auracle »

notch656a wrote: post #223
ars wrote: post #89

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Colic is really bad, it hurts the baby quite a bit, so they'll cry non-stop, which makes the adults crazy. If you have such a baby, it helps to remember how badly it's hurting them. Have you ever had really bad heartburn? Now imagine that for hours on end, with no ability to do anything about it.

It hurts everyone really bad. The child is screaming 12-16 hours a day, for in our case 9 months on end. It nearly resulted in divorce of a couple that had been through a lot with strength. It's hard on the child but it's also genuine torture to scream at someone 12-16 hours a day from the bottom of your lungs, in fact I'd call it domestic violence to torture others in this manner. Unless you've experienced this for…

Let me throw out another potential cause that worked for my parents: baby with a small butthole. They used lube and their fingers and gradually stretched it.

That baby may or may not have been me. The doctor our baby has had never heard of such a thing, so maybe it’s just hooey.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#243

Post by Auracle »

bitshiftfaced wrote: post #99
sacrosancty wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you believe the consensus of medical professionals, then yes there is. In my country, Infant formula comes with a government-mandated warning on the tin recommending you not to use it. Maternity wards won't give it to newborns unless there's a medical need, and if the mother can't produce enough milk, they work hard to ensure that she can. That's the "appeal to authority" reason. How wrong it is, and even how sure…

Studies have found correlations between breastfeeding and later outcomes. But those studies have a bias. For example, mothers who graduated college are more likely to breastfeed, and their children are more likely to go to college. The only way to factor out the biases completely is with a twin study: same mother, same environment. That's what they did with the "Twins Early Development Study." This study found no cor…

There’s a good study out there that used parents that couldn’t breastfeed. Some used donated milk and the other group used formula. There was a correlation for IQ, though it was pretty small.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#244

Post by sergers »

silisili wrote: post #236
sergers wrote: post #218

Earlier quoted context omitted.

We were definately a dog family, when we had our first born kid, untill she was 2 years old there were so many things we related to same as a puppy

A lot of people will roll their eyes and yell it's not the same, but you're right - depending on how much you care about puppies dying, I guess. Caring for a < 2 month old puppy with parvo is a literal nightmare. Force feed it Pedialyte every single hour, watch it puke and crap its guts out, and pray it doesn't die. Basically 5 days without touching REM.

Yes definately how much you care about dogs/pets.

Everyone cares, but my wife had sworn off children and dogs were here "kids".

So we definately babied our puppies

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#245

Post by wincy »

barbazoo wrote: post #241
wincy wrote: post #202

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I agree and think there’s definitely some receptor or activation in the brain for happiness or cuteness that happens that wasn’t available before having children. We had cats when our first daughter was born and coming home from the hospital it’s like what was previously a 10 in cuteness (our cats) became like a 7 and our kids cuteness level was an 11. It was bizarre and amazing and immediately noticeable to me and m…

I would love to have co-slept when ours was little but we were pretty anxious about accidentally hurting them. Maybe next time.

I didn’t keep her on my side of the bed because we noticed I slept much more deeply than my wife did. However, my wife was still waking up well rested despite being relatively alert with the infant, breast feeding ad libitum. I’ve heard that this is a problem with women who have to go back to work though as the bottle feeding and such preps the child for day care. Our daughter got the majority of her calories from breast milk the first year and we were fortunate to have the luxury of being a single income family. Obviously this would be much more complicated with a two income earner situation.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#246

Post by entropicgravity »

At four months old my infant was crying because, and I kid you not, she wanted me to take her to the kitchen and hold her up where she could watch mom cooking. How do I know this? Because she would do nothing but cry until, by accident, I went to say something to mom in the kitchen and instantly the infant stopped crying and stayed happily quiet for about 15 minutes thereafter. Who knew that four month old infants are thinking things like that?

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#247

Post by notch656a »

Auracle wrote: post #242
notch656a wrote: post #223

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It hurts everyone really bad. The child is screaming 12-16 hours a day, for in our case 9 months on end. It nearly resulted in divorce of a couple that had been through a lot with strength. It's hard on the child but it's also genuine torture to scream at someone 12-16 hours a day from the bottom of your lungs, in fact I'd call it domestic violence to torture others in this manner. Unless you've experienced this for…

Let me throw out another potential cause that worked for my parents: baby with a small butthole. They used lube and their fingers and gradually stretched it. That baby may or may not have been me. The doctor our baby has had never heard of such a thing, so maybe it’s just hooey.

>The cause of colic is generally unknown. Fewer than 5% of infants who cry excessively turn out to have an underlying organic disease

Could be small asshole, but the thing about colic is usually there's simply NOTHING that can be fixed.

People want to think you can fix something, or that there is some underlying disease. With colic that is rarely the case. That's the maddening thing about it, there's nothing wrong per se with the child, nothing to fix, no cause to be found. People offer solutions constantly, you keep trying to solve it, but at the end of the day the child simply acts like they hate life and everyone in it and there's simply nothing you can do but wait it out for months. You can drive yourself mad trying to find something wrong when there simply is no curable solution but time.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#248

Post by Hallucinaut »

EdwardDiego wrote: post #87
asdfasgasdgasdg wrote: post #2

Great if it works for you, but for those who are dealing with babies, I wouldn't beat myself up if this advice doesn't apply. The parenting advice world is chock full of people who found something that worked for them and who then made the unwarranted conclusion that it is universal truth. For example, their techniques that "always work" definitely do not always work. Maybe they always worked for their particular bab…

Every child is a whole new world, a whole new potential, and a whole new problem. 1. My first child couldn't be calmed easily, although I found a song that somehow worked. [0] 2. Second child could be soothed by slowly rubbing from his temple down past his eye to his cheek. 3. Third child hated that, but loved having her forehead rubbed slowly in a horizontal manner. 4. Fourth child just wanted a firm pressure on the…

My childhood heavily featured Dominion Road as my grandparents lived nearby so I had to recheck I opened the right link when I saw that song appear.

Now I'm wondering why 20 years ago I thought the music video for that song featured a cameo of the black panther statue that to me represents that road...

Also lovely words. I can't imagine having five!

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#249

Post by Hallucinaut »

Hallucinaut wrote: post #248
EdwardDiego wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Every child is a whole new world, a whole new potential, and a whole new problem. 1. My first child couldn't be calmed easily, although I found a song that somehow worked. [0] 2. Second child could be soothed by slowly rubbing from his temple down past his eye to his cheek. 3. Third child hated that, but loved having her forehead rubbed slowly in a horizontal manner. 4. Fourth child just wanted a firm pressure on the…

My childhood heavily featured Dominion Road as my grandparents lived nearby so I had to recheck I opened the right link when I saw that song appear. Now I'm wondering why 20 years ago I thought the music video for that song featured a cameo of the black panther statue that to me represents that road... Also lovely words. I can't imagine having five!

Ah, there's a second, earlier (and more charismatic, in my opinion) video.

The panther statue is at 2:45. I'm glad I didn't imagine this, I started to feel the Mandela effect.

https://youtu.be/PfdvAVkg1X0

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#250

Post by jsilence »

gameshot911 wrote: post #103

Of kids I've always thought "maybe one day". I can see how it'd be a tough, but extremely rewarding and meaningful endeavor. But reading this article made me think for the first time "actually, I think I don't want kids." So many "mental CPU cycles" spent learning about pregnancy, babies, why they cry, how to care for them. It just doesn't appeal to me at all - I think it'd resent it taking me away from spending time…

Trying to expain the joy of children is like recommending to read a book about the joy of swimming. You simply have to make the experience to understand. For long periods of my life I felt detached from the world and from myself. With our two children I feel a deep and satisfying attachment unlike any other feeling. Reading a lot about puppies in the comments. Would sacrifice our beloved cat without blinking for our children if it were neccessary. Sorry Merlin, you are not only not in the same league, you are not in the same universe. The whole thing about loosing your freedom when having kids is taking it the wrong way. Your life is not about your ego any more, not about your comforts, your desires. Its about your child. You become the path and the foundation. There is something deeply satisfying being there for them.
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