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Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

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Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#531

Post by rhexs »

brobinson wrote: post #457
tayo42 wrote: post #335

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Where are you getting 10% guaranteed a year?

As of right now, dividend-paying mortgage REITs pay around 9-10%. The US government will never let its housing market fail, and low interest rates let these trusts borrow inexpensively.

While I agree that ever-increasing housing prices are almost the only platform both parties agree on, when there are already low interest rates and inflation occurring, the government is out of moves.

Never say never. Markets revert to the mean eventually.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#533

Post by recuter »

mikeuxinnuendo wrote: post #304
recuter wrote: post #245

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Chiang Mai and the rest of Thailand are rather shit at the moment with insane entry requirements. Even if you persevere (and don't get jailed in quarantine hotel) understand that there are no tourists, no expats, no nightlife at the moment and many many failed businesses and ghost town vibes. "Just learn Thai lol" is not actionable advice either. I say this as someone who has literally done what you suggest in 50+ co…

So long as you're fully vaxed its not so bad. Heading there next month ;)

You can certainly catch a variant or just test positive even if you are fully vaxed and boosted. And frankly it wouldn't surprise me if this is just a way to shakedown tourists.

They decided last week that on the first and fifth days from arrival you must stay in an approved hotel. They don't tell you the results until you are all tucked in, and so you have a rather high chance of ending up in an expensive covid jail.

Next month is a long time away and they are making up new rules as they go as per usual. I admire your optimism and hope you get lucky and enjoy the place as few people will get to experience the islands so empty :)

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#534

Post by bredren »

altcognito wrote: post #413
altdataseller wrote: post #303

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don’t think you need to underplay OP issues. While he may be better off financially than lots of people, feeling lost with little passion for life is still not a good situation, and he deserves to feel the way he does.

He's not underplaying it. He is telling him to have perspective. Life has been pretty good to OP, at least as he portrays it. OP is not wrong. Time is running out . His best physical years are behind him. On the plus side he has deep experience. He probably has seen quite a bit. Maybe his feeling of having seen everything is justified. Existential dread is a bit of a thing, but it comes for the successful and the tru…

> His best physical years are behind him.

They could be. Or it could depend on OP. Tom Brady has more Super Bowl Trophies and MVP selections from __after__ he was 37.

There are plenty of athletic sports where being young does not offer easy superiority.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#535

Post by Nbox9 »

SamoyedFurFluff wrote: post #452
stonewashed wrote: post #366

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, we have. Apparently it's close to impossible to adopt a kid for us, considering that we are in our 40's and that demand is much greater than supply, so they pick younger couples. Also, there seems to be a whole industry pretty much stealing children from poor countries and selling them to couples like us. I do not want to be part of that.

Demand is much greater than supply? I’m pretty surprised to hear this actually. Would you be willing to educate me a little bit about this? My understanding is that there are countless children in foster homes waiting to be adopted.

Demand is incredibly high for babies, and drops off with age.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#537

Post by Aeolun »

matwood wrote: post #228
Aeolun wrote: post #168

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You don’t feel the amount of new things you see slows down considerably as you grow older? It’s not that you can’t find novel things any more if you go looking for them, but most everyday things hold no more (or less) excitement. I notice this especially much with my 3 year old son, for whom everything is fascinating. He’ll find out that sticking a bowl upside down in the water and turning it face up will make a lot…

> You don’t feel the amount of new things you see slows down considerably as you grow older? At 44 I have the opposite problem. The more I learn, the more I realize I don't know. When I was younger I had the ego of a young person and thought I was always on the cusp of knowing it all. As I got older I realized I was simply unaware. It's a bit cliché, but I started approaching everything, even things I 'knew' with a b…

I guess I realize that, and then when I consider how much time I spent getting where I am at one topic, it never really seems like it’ll be possible doing it for another.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#538

Post by bredren »

owly wrote: post #230

LOL. Getting old is 35. ONLY $500K in savings at 35. Such a sad story. So sorry for you, as most people are lucky to have saved $50K at 35 or even 55! Money has no meaning if you are feeling lost with $500K. Seriously though, my advice would be stop comparing yourself to others. Older or younger, married or single, successful or not, fit or fat. Know thyself. Go on a meditation retreat. You have nothing to lose and n…

> Money has no meaning if you are feeling lost with $500K.

Perhaps it would start to have meaning if the money was taken away.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#539

Post by rchaud »

xwdv wrote: post #237
readingnews wrote: post #196

I do not mean to tear down OP, but you are 35 and have $500k in savings. You lived in other countries, had startups and worked at a big company. You are not lost, you are one of the 1%. It sounds like you did a lot and now "normal" life that the rest of have to go through seems sucky. It is. I have years of experience, not 1/5th your savings, have not traveled and now I am actually too old for "big company" to hire m…

Although life starts for a lot of people at 35, I envy those people who are able to start much earlier. These are the people who have their first relationships in high school and college, find their life partner in early twenties, get the right job, a house, kids, keep their friend circle, invest money as early as possible, god damn. They live perfect fuckin lives and it’s all because they bravely jumped in and embra…

I used to think this way, especially after attending weddings of friends who've been together since their early 20s. Recently, one of those 'perfect' couples got divorced. Two attractive, charismatic, financially set individuals who couldn't make it work anymore. Together 10 years, living together for 5, married for 4.

Part of the issue for them is that they both feel they didn't explore their options enough when they were young and attractive (they still are).

It's a different problem than those faced by people who barely enjoyed romantic lives growing up. But for them, it turned out to be a big enough to end their marriage.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#540

Post by drran »

CorrectHorseBat wrote: post #439
drran wrote: post #401

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Buy a bike with matching frame for your height, with good double suspension, e.g. with front and rear RockShox or better, and raise the handlebar to a comfortable height. Your back will thank you. Install all safety systems: front and rear bike lights, mirror, reflectors, use helmet, reflectors, wear reflective jacket, etc. You must be visible at the road at all times. (I use no helmet, because I'm trained to fall pr…

> with front and rear RockShox or better If you're only biking on the road I wouldn't get that, only slows you down. >(I use no helmet, because I'm trained to fall properly, but I recommend to wear helmet until you fall at least 10 times.). Not sure if you're serious...

> If you're only biking on the road I wouldn't get that, only slows you down.

They will make you feel like you are moving slower, but my bicycle computer shows that I move faster. Moreover, wheels follows ground more precisely, which reduces risk of losing contact with ground. I'm crossing road bumps at full speed, while sitting and continuing pedaling.

> Not sure if you're serious...

I'm serious for both recommending to wear helmet for first 10 falls at least (because newbie is like a toddler), and I'm serious that I don't need helmet (because I'm not a toddler anymore).

Bicycle is safer than walking per km traveled. Are you wearing a helmet when walking? It's dangerous!

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