Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

news.ycombinator.com

91–100 of 890 posts

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#91
This resonates a lot with me. In my case I think the lack of a relationship for a few years exacerbates everything else. A lot of suggestions from small (go for walks) to big (do some travelling) just make me a little sad that I would be doing those things alone.

I always find it particularly funny when someone says "oh, I totally get feeling lonely. Just the other day I was telling my wife that I was..."

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#93

I don’t have any real advice for you except to say that you’re not alone and what you’re experiencing is shared by many. I’m turning 34 next week and feel similarly, despite having achieved a lot of “success” in my business life. I too haven’t had a relationship in many, many years and am disillusioned by technology. I miss my 20s and envy the younger generation for many things. My body is getting older and more tire…

In fairness, OP asked for armchair diagnoses. It's hard to stay away from recommending travel or whatever works for you, but that shows that it's a question that a lot of us (a surprising number of us, from this thread) are struggling with, so everyone wants to test their own theory.

Nothin's a panacea, you said that right.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#94

I'd buy crypto for half of the money and forget about it. Move somewhere cheap but comfy and play computer games and browse the internet and interact with people there for few years till I figure out if there's anything else in this world I'd rather do than enjoy my early retirement from the world of money and relationship chasing. I'm 43 and doing something similar for last few years, not exactly the same because I…

You knew you'd be heavily downvoted for this, right?

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#95
You would think its an existential, psychological issue that you're getting old and feeling lost, but it seems to me that you're just entering Male Menopause / Andropause. Go to a Male Health Clinic, or a doctor who specializes with Testosterone Replacement Therapy, and check your Testosterone levels, not just Total but Free T too, plus SHBG, plus Prolactin and Estrogen. Trust me.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#96
post #9

Put things in perspective. There are people in their 50s that still go to bars and continue until their 70s probably, stopping only because of physical inability. Anyway, that shouldn't be used as a measure is what I'm trying to say. Remember that anything that happens to you has happened to thousands and thousands of men in the past so don't put so much pressure on living. Also, try to see yourself more as an artist…

Also, WTF is wrong with bars? Bars are great.

I can't remember what book it was, maybe something by Douglas Coupland (?) He talks about how there was probably some guy just like him in 200 AD, in the Roman Empire, going through exactly what he's going through now. Forgotten to history, all his thoughts. And he's just that guy all over again.

Compared to beating the shit out of yourself for not being Mohammed or Ghengis Khan, Bars are just fine.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#97
I think this is just the ennui that's part of life. Even married, social people feel the same at some point.

Just consider yourself blessed to have a half a million on the side and think about all the potential problems and health issues you DONT have. A bit of stoic thinking maybe.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#98
post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Perhaps this is naive of me but to have half a million in the bank and being miserable sounds like a pretty poor state of affairs. Time to convert some of that money into time and experiences.

Image OP being in the same state of mind but with 20K in the bank. Now, that’s miserable.

Don't say stuff like that in a public forum there's bound to be people who fit that criterion reading this

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#99
Write down what are your expectations at 35. Maybe they are outdated and you have been imposing them to yourself unconsciously, making yourself feel bad because of it.

Re-asset them to match your current situation and find your new priorities. If you are lacking passion, it's time for a new challenge outside of your comfort zone. If that doesn't work, you can always go back to what you are used to.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#100
post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>I suggest machining That's a great hobby, but instead of screws i made some small steam-engines, it's not too hard and it's absolutely fascinating if they start working ;) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sp8FMqgc5Io Not my content...

What if they blow into your face? :/

Then you learn about how the medical system works. Everything present a learning opportunity; it's up to you to embrace it and earn some benefit.
Post reply on HN