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Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

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Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#41
Oh, I love this question!

And I love when I find myself in situations like this - although it happens more and more rarely as I age.

The answer, of course, is: perspective.

And there are all sorts of ways to shift your perspective, but the general heuristic is to step back, zoom out, and talk to yourself in broader, more generic terms. Details are your enemy when you're in a rut (although they turn into your best friend when you're on a roll!)

Take some time, over a number of days, to consciously and consistently quiet your mind. Just give yourself the luxury for a while to not worry or even think about the details of your situation. Try to find some broad positive themes about life in general. Some things that are, roughly, good. Just stay away from the details.

Take it easy. Disengage for a while and take time to breathe, to walk, to do simple things that are, fundamentally, pleasurable.

It won't take more than a few days to get yourself back on track. Juice will start flowing to you again soon enough. Just don't rush into it, simply let it come on its own terms, whenever it wants.

You'll be fine.

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#42
OK, this is pretty generic and others have said similar things already, but it helped me before:

- Set a "go-to-bed" alarm. When it rings, wrap up whatever you do and go to bed. Then sleep for 9 hours if you feel the need to.

- No screens nor books or any light in the bedroom when in bed.

- Exercising 20-30 minutes at once every day. A slow job or a fast walk is enough (unless your feel motivated to do more, obviously). Don't overdo it. Do it every day.

- A quick nap after lunch: 15mn with a timer, lay down, close your eyes and stay there.

- When stuck, take a quick walk or walk around the room. Move. Stretch. Don't stay down.

Hopefully this can help you process whatever is troubling you, and prevent your brain from idling on social media.

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#43
Try making this change incrementally. Set a very small goal for the first week. For example you could start forcing to sit at your desk for 5/10 minutes with no distractions and start small just making a list of what you should do. Give you a small goal after you managed to sit down. Slowly increase the time and start doing some exercise. Walk everyday of you can't do anything else. Walk a lot with no distractions, no phone/music, just the environment and your mind. Try to stick to a routine every day if possible. And then slowly increase those minutes at your desk every day.

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#44
post #41

Oh, I love this question! And I love when I find myself in situations like this - although it happens more and more rarely as I age. The answer, of course, is: perspective. And there are all sorts of ways to shift your perspective, but the general heuristic is to step back, zoom out, and talk to yourself in broader, more generic terms. Details are your enemy when you're in a rut (although they turn into your best fri…

This applies well to me. However, I was well into adulthood and several ruts before I realized I have an additional weakness: I'm (almost always) unable to change perspective without the help of others.

I don't mean that I need to tell others that I'm in a rut and need perspective change. I need the others – friends and colleagues – to help anchor my perspective to reality (or their reality) by simple having normal interactions with them.

Needless to say, the pandemic has made this hard. And I'm afraid that the older I get, the less I can rely on this very good mechanism I have for perspective change. Any advice?

(A therapist suggested I train my own ability to reality-anchor. It worked a tiny bit, but given enough time I always start doubting my own anchoring, and need peers to reanchor me. I know their view isn't canon either, but it feels objective to me. Mine feels shaky.)

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#45
Ah, there's a secret, you stop trying. You need to do something difficult, new and unrelated. Cycle to Canada and buy a hot dog. Live off-grid for a week. Take your nephew to Disneyland. Something clearly defined, and a bit nuts. When you return, you'll feel much better.

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#46
Exercise. Try daily rigorous cardio workout for 30 minutes a day.

AFAIK the brain releases endorphins or something when you exercise, so you actually get a high out of exercising (in addition to getting fitter).

Do it in the morning so that you'll feel good till noon atleast.

Once you're in a good mood positive things will start happening.

Cheers :)

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#48
post #44
post #41

Oh, I love this question! And I love when I find myself in situations like this - although it happens more and more rarely as I age. The answer, of course, is: perspective. And there are all sorts of ways to shift your perspective, but the general heuristic is to step back, zoom out, and talk to yourself in broader, more generic terms. Details are your enemy when you're in a rut (although they turn into your best fri…

This applies well to me. However, I was well into adulthood and several ruts before I realized I have an additional weakness: I'm (almost always) unable to change perspective without the help of others. I don't mean that I need to tell others that I'm in a rut and need perspective change. I need the others – friends and colleagues – to help anchor my perspective to reality (or their reality) by simple having normal i…

For a self-induced perspective change that may not work for everyone: buy a war-time photography book, the ones with the really nasty gore, and have a two minute look at some of the pictures in the pages.

It's likely you'll physically want to throw up from just looking at the images, and this bodily reaction is for me one of the "deepest" ways of my body physically understanding how good I have it. I haven't had to do this in the last 5 years, and only did this 3 times total.

This can seem like it's wrong, and maybe it is, but it worked for me so maybe it'll work for you.

There's a side benefit to this, I've become more anti-war, which I think is a good quality to have.

Re: Ask HN: How do you get out of a rut?

#50

You don’t. Just let it run its course. The idea that there’s something wrong with you for not wanting to do anything is artificial. There’s nothing wrong with being a person. And people have flaws. I spent a few years playing dota competitively. It eventually led to getting a job working on HoN, a dota clone. But at the time, the trajectory looked a lot like “do nothing but play games for a year.” You can’t know wher…

Lol at the "just let go" vibe, then a stab of "adderall helps too" at the end.
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