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Now to all girls who reject me to settle with a alpha male, when you discover a decade later I'm more financially rich. Please don't call that women's oppression. That just making wrong decisions and paying for it later.So, the fact that you found a game you can play and win at, justifies the mistreatment of people losing at other games? ;)
I appreciate your point, and i agree that people who are strong-willed enough can break the game, but that still doesn't change the fact that they're expected to play. The fact that society values different things at different stages of life doesn't mean that the game that you're good at is any fairer than the games you were bad at when society valued youth, vitality and ability to hit and/or catch a ball. All that's different is that you're winning :P
I dig that the internet is all about flying your freak-flag, but there are still common standards that society expects you to adhere to. When you go grocery shopping, or when you pass your neighbors on your way to work, or when you're out with your friends and you've got to deal with the bouncers at a club, or a bar tender at a pub. All of these places have expected APIs, and if you behave out of their bounds you have to do on the fly content negotiation, and some people will be tolerant and accept such negotiations, and other people are just going to fire back "request denied".
I agree to an extent that we control how much we let that get to us. But there are a lot of things that go into our mental health and stability. If your family is also constantly haranguing you about the same shit you get from everyone else, you have no safe quarter to be yourself (again except maybe the internets). That's not really a healthy/sane way to live.
I'm not Indian, but the Chinese side of my family totally thinks that my worth (both as an individual and as a representative of my family) is attached to my financial stability and whether i've got a "real job" or not. Let me tell you, i have gotten a lot less flack now that i'm not freelancing. They were also weirded out that i got married prior to reaching that point of financial stability. But that in a way is the benefit of being the son of immigrants. The things that society judges me by are different from the metrics that my family judges me by. That's something that people like me can play to my advantage, or for some people, it means that they get the worst of both worlds, they can't win either in society's perception (and stay true to their family) or visa versa.
The fundamental question is how optional each of these games are. I don't take it for granted that they are optional. I think that taking the position that women have a choice to play the game is a difficult one for me to accept.