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Ask HN: How can I stop worrying and start living?

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Re: Ask HN: How can I stop worrying and start living?

#11

Post by the_only_law »

randycupertino wrote: post #8

This is a silly little mindgame but it really does help with worry and stress. You basically flip all worst-case scenarios on their head to see the advantages of whatever situation you're in. Good Game: Good! Now I can .... Eg. My husband is divorcing me. Good! Now I can find someone who loves me deeply and doesn't leave ice cream containers composting on his desk. My upstairs neighbors are hella loud and annoying. G…

I’ve tried this before, but I always fear I vastly overestimated my ability to handle the worst case.

Re: Ask HN: How can I stop worrying and start living?

#14

Post by unyttigfjelltol »

Exercise.

You are missing out on things, bad things will happen, and one day it will all come to an end.

Now that we got that out of the way, recognize your body is a machine and you have at least some control over it. Get some exercise, change your location, give some attention to what you eat, connect with some people live. Make your body do something other than what it is doing.

Re: Ask HN: How can I stop worrying and start living?

#15

Post by randycupertino »

the_only_law wrote: post #11
randycupertino wrote: post #8

This is a silly little mindgame but it really does help with worry and stress. You basically flip all worst-case scenarios on their head to see the advantages of whatever situation you're in. Good Game: Good! Now I can .... Eg. My husband is divorcing me. Good! Now I can find someone who loves me deeply and doesn't leave ice cream containers composting on his desk. My upstairs neighbors are hella loud and annoying. G…

I’ve tried this before, but I always fear I vastly overestimated my ability to handle the worst case.

> I always fear I vastly overestimated my ability to handle the worst case.

Good! Now you can live through rough times and prove your own fortitude and resilience to yourself and the doubters.

Re: Ask HN: How can I stop worrying and start living?

#17

Post by steve_avery »

I think the first piece of real advice I can give you is to seek therapy. Find someone who listens to you and try to explain what you are feeling to them. These problems are not unique to you, but your version of them is unique and giving prescriptive advice here will likely miss the kernel of your truth.

Beyond that, the most simple advice is the best that I think you can hope for here. Make sure that you are taking care of yourself, deeply. What do you need right now? To eat, to sleep, drink water, go for a run? Listen to those needs and act on them before anything else.

Good luck. You only have one life. Make it the best you can.

Re: Ask HN: How can I stop worrying and start living?

#20

Post by treme »

few things.. How is your sleep, diet and exercise?

Have you done any therapy? sounds like you could really benefit from CBT to help you deal with catastrophizing..

"Catastrophizing is a way of thinking called a 'cognitive distortion. ' A person who catastrophizes usually sees an unfavorable outcome to an event and then decides that if this outcome does happen, the results will be a disaster."

CBT can help you understand how to get out of such negative feedback cycles in your own head.

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