Daddy isn’t coming back
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Daddy isn’t coming back
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Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#2Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#3I have a black thought on this. I would be happy if someone corrected me. When something breaks, sometimes we repair it, sometimes we throw it out. The more valuable the item, the more we will spend to fix it. However even with the most valuable items, we sometimes reluctantly decide that it is broken beyond repair. Are people like this? Are some simply too broken to fix? I feel awful thinking this, but I wonder if there is some truth to it.
Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#4I have a black thought on this. I would be happy if someone corrected me. When something breaks, sometimes we repair it, sometimes we throw it out. The more valuable the item, the more we will spend to fix it. However even with the most valuable items, we sometimes reluctantly decide that it is broken beyond repair. Are people like this? Are some simply too broken to fix? I feel awful thinking this, but I wonder if t…
Objectively, it's possible to be "too broken" to be fixed (e.g. acute blunt force trauma, malignant tumor, etc.) where the only "fix" is palliative care. Although, I think technically we would say: "too broken to fix based on our CURRENT tools, knowledge and resources". It's an interesting thought experiment to think about how advanced can we become where anything is fixable?
Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#5It's a difficult read; more of a personal/lived experience but with some stats and thoughts sprinkled through.
I have two young'uns (3 years and 6 months), so it was the title and its expansion that got to me the most; telling your kids that their parent is not coming back? I struggle to tell them when mommy is out for a grocery run!
I told the children early on Saturday morning. “Daddy isn’t coming back,” I said as we lay curled into each other in bed. “He didn’t want to live any more and he made himself die.”Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#6I can’t stand articles that start with “we need to talk about…”. What the author is really saying is “This topic is important to me, and I’d like to pressure you into having the same views on it as I do”. Regardless of the merit of those views, the only thing that ever comes after “we need to talk about…” is a description of some hardship the author (or somebody the author knows) faced, an explanation of how that shaped the agenda they’re trying to promote, and some appeal to emotion suggesting that their views are the only valid views a person can hold.
Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#7I have a black thought on this. I would be happy if someone corrected me. When something breaks, sometimes we repair it, sometimes we throw it out. The more valuable the item, the more we will spend to fix it. However even with the most valuable items, we sometimes reluctantly decide that it is broken beyond repair. Are people like this? Are some simply too broken to fix? I feel awful thinking this, but I wonder if t…
in a perfect world, i believe there is a happy and fulfilling lifestyle we can carve out for anyone in a well-functioning society, no matter where they come from or where they're going
we just need the space / time / resources to supply all those different lifestyles that swing outside the mean, and a moral code that allows for them all to exist on the same planet
or just more planets...
Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#8I have a black thought on this. I would be happy if someone corrected me. When something breaks, sometimes we repair it, sometimes we throw it out. The more valuable the item, the more we will spend to fix it. However even with the most valuable items, we sometimes reluctantly decide that it is broken beyond repair. Are people like this? Are some simply too broken to fix? I feel awful thinking this, but I wonder if t…
Objectively, it's possible to be "too broken" to be fixed (e.g. acute blunt force trauma, malignant tumor, etc.) where the only "fix" is palliative care. Although, I think technically we would say: "too broken to fix based on our CURRENT tools, knowledge and resources". It's an interesting thought experiment to think about how advanced can we become where anything is fixable?
In addition, this gets complicated VERY quickly; it's relatively easy to say "This leg is broken; it is not right; it needs to be fixed and changed for better".
With mental illnesses though, it's difficult to comprehensively, objectively, universally define "right/correct/well" and "broken/incorrect".
We all perceive the external world through a faulty set of sensors and interpretations which trigger some mental processes and reactions. It's difficult to mark some such perception/processing as "broken, not worth living". My gut feel is that it's more about finding appropriate environment.
Additionally, non-living items are frequently judged based on their utility; "too broken to fix" is related to "cheaper to replace than to fix". With human beings and mental care - not only is it hard to define "Broken" let alone "too broken", it's far harder to define "not feasible to repair" - though of course, when it comes to public policy, such choices are made daily, by necessity. Only so much money to be invested into so many programs.
And while I'm rambling, note that myself, and many others, there is an inherent double-standard: my threshold for myself being too broken to fix is far far lower (and I'm a massive proponent of voluntary euthanasia, for myself) than for others (I don't want anybody in my life to leave ever)
Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#9Knowing that you're at high risk of suicide or have other serious mental health problems is also a good reason to avoid having kids. This isn't directed at the author of the article or their partner; it's how I think when I plan my own life.
Re: Daddy isn’t coming back
#10I have schizoaffective bipolar disorder, and aspergers. I was making $130,000 a year as a network engineer at Cisco in 1999 before I became too sick to work anymore. Right now I am homeless living in my van with a transmission about to go. I have attempted suicide three times already. I keep thinking about doing it again. No one wants to provide me the best medicine, stable housing. I make $1700 on disability but I can never save enough for a deposit. So what is the point. The fact that I cannot get housing just proves no one cares.
And through all this I keep up my research on my familial disease, pressuring doctors to at least do some tests. I am pretty sure, looking at my genetics, I actually have a mitochondrial disorder. This is an easy test, but they will never do it. They just keep focusing on the same old pathways and that is why there is no progress.
The medications? They do nothing but make me worse. They usually give me drug induced lupus or just make me more suicidal the next day. The only one I can rely on is Klonopin, it works great but I do not take it everyday adn I only take a very low dose, the lowest that works. And every time I get a new doctor I face the stigma of being a drug seeker. Luckily, that is not so much of a problem anymore.
Now iwth COVID, everyone thinks they haev a mood disoder but in reality it is just situational, but they take up all the appointments so now mine are getting pushed further apart.
My nephew hung himself at 14 years old after a doctor thought he had ADHD and gave him ritalin. It was a misdiagnosis.
If you do not have a serious mental illness you have no idea how bad the treatments are and how they ignore any other issues you have in your body. We are the garbage people in this age but we probably used to be the shaman.
So all I can do now is drink a bit to escape, its a great drugs, an awesome calcium channel blocker.
Oh well, that's enough of that. Just wanted to share.