Which jobs most often pair together among married couples • Hacker News Board

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#391

Post by bumby » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 3:26 PM UTC

fleddr wrote: post #377

nxm wrote: post #163

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Men generally do not care about the income of their wife, as that's not what they're innately attracted to. Hypergamy is characteristic of women and hence they want to marry up, and won't settle for someone who makes less than them. The latter is a reason for why there are so many educated but unmarried women today in their 30s and 40s.

I'd add that when you're in your 30s or 40s, you're simply too late. The good men are already taken. There may still be plenty of men in the same age group, single and good earners, but almost by definition they won't meet the highest of standards. Because if they did, they wouldn't be single.

This reminds me of the classical efficient market economists perspective that it’s a waste of time to pick up a $100 bill from the sidewalk. Because if it were a real $100 bill somebody else would have obviously picked it up already.

I don’t know that you can make the claim that the mating market is completely efficient.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#392

Post by bumby » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

QuarterReptile wrote: post #180

whakim wrote: post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Social class seems to have always played an important role in marriage (e.g. Jane Austen as a primer on 19th-century upperclass British society), so I'm not sure it's fair to say that this is change from the past. But I think it's fair to say that it is a factor in concentrating wealth.

The change is the soaring achievement levels of some woman where they achieve themselves right out of marriage-ability.

Can you elaborate on why high achieving women are less likely to get married? I think the research shows the opposite and the marriages tend to last longer

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#393

Post by cookiesboxcar » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 3:43 PM UTC

globular-toast wrote: post #324

mabbo wrote: post #141

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You're crazy. My wife is an engineer and I'm a software developer. We make so much money. Want to know a great way to keep a relationship together? Never worry about money ever .

Better hope you never have to struggle through anything together then. Money doesn't solve all problems, sorry to say.

There are still struggles, but the money part has a material impact. IVF (it took us 7 rounds) is very emotionally draining... but it's likely an order of magnitude less so when money is not a factor.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#394

Post by BatteryMountain » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 4:03 PM UTC

globular-toast wrote: post #342

BatteryMountain wrote: post #333

Earlier quoted context omitted.

jUsT YOu.

This is what it looks like to me: https://i.imgur.com/qd0Y6R0.png Notice how some letters are taller than others, in particular r, u, s and w. What the hell is going on here I wonder?

Oh wow! Nope mine looks normal.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#395

Post by newbie2020 » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 4:08 PM UTC

bumby wrote: post #223

whakim wrote: post #206

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thanks for bringing up the source; if you do end up finding the data I'd love to see it. It's also fascinating to think about the relationship between social changes like this one and some of the economic/political drivers of inequality (less progressive taxation/inegalitarian investments in education/globalization). I suspect that the rise of tertiary education over the past 40-50 years which has further stratified…

> I suspect that the rise of tertiary education over the past 40-50 years which has further stratified educational attainment along class lines may be a relevant factor. This was a central point to the aforementioned book. The gist being elites invest in education, skill investment, and long hours that leads to more money that they can use to invest in more education and skill development in their children to repeat…

I dunno, I’m pretty sure it’s awesome being a winner!

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#396

Post by bigbillheck » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 4:21 PM UTC

nxm wrote: post #163

bumby wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’ve read that one reason wealth inequality is worse today is because high-education-high-income individuals want to marry other HEHI individuals whereas in the past this wasn’t the case. If the claim about the past is true, it seems to undermine your point

Men generally do not care about the income of their wife, as that's not what they're innately attracted to. Hypergamy is characteristic of women and hence they want to marry up, and won't settle for someone who makes less than them. The latter is a reason for why there are so many educated but unmarried women today in their 30s and 40s.

> Men generally do not care about the income of their wife,

Right up until it becomes greater than theirs.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#397

Post by Unbeliever69 » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 4:22 PM UTC

aidenn0 wrote: post #251

Unbeliever69 wrote: post #40

It is extremely rare for musicians to marry outside of their field. Particularly professional musicians.

92% of them do per TFA[1]? Also my experience is that most professional musicians are not married to other professional musicians. 1: Well if you consider that teachers could be music teachers, that still puts an upper bound of 25% or so of all musicians marrying other musicians.

My wife is a professional trumpet player. In the Utah Symphony the vast majority of members have a musical spouse. It is not uncommon for spouses to be in the same orchestra (nepotism anyone? fyi these positions are always filled via audition). What probably skews this data is that while musicians overwhelmingly marry other musicians, this doesn't mean that one or both don't move on to other careers to pay the bills. Also, I'm not a musical spouse.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#398

Post by allturtles » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 4:36 PM UTC

bumby wrote: post #391

fleddr wrote: post #377

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd add that when you're in your 30s or 40s, you're simply too late. The good men are already taken. There may still be plenty of men in the same age group, single and good earners, but almost by definition they won't meet the highest of standards. Because if they did, they wouldn't be single.

This reminds me of the classical efficient market economists perspective that it’s a waste of time to pick up a $100 bill from the sidewalk. Because if it were a real $100 bill somebody else would have obviously picked it up already. I don’t know that you can make the claim that the mating market is completely efficient.

The reason that joke is funny is that the economists are ignoring the fact that someone has to be the first person to come across that $100 bill. One is not likely be the first woman to 'come across' a single man in his 30s-40s, who has presumably been 'on the sidewalk' for 10-20+ years.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#399

Post by hadlock » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 4:47 PM UTC

bumby wrote: post #77

beerandt wrote: post #56

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Except many couples meet in school, where they'd be exposed to a disproportionate number of potential spouses within their own field of study, and maybe to a lesser extent others in related programs within the same college. Which would also be skewed by things like length of study and personality types attracted to particular interests. Eg, Doctors and lawyers often don't want to get married until after school, at wh…

I’ve read that one reason wealth inequality is worse today is because high-education-high-income individuals want to marry other HEHI individuals whereas in the past this wasn’t the case. If the claim about the past is true, it seems to undermine your point

Do you have a link to this article/study? I'd like to explore this concept more. I don't know if it's true but it certainly seems within the realm of possibility

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#400

Post by bumby » Wed, Oct 27, 2021, 5:01 PM UTC

allturtles wrote: post #398

bumby wrote: post #391

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This reminds me of the classical efficient market economists perspective that it’s a waste of time to pick up a $100 bill from the sidewalk. Because if it were a real $100 bill somebody else would have obviously picked it up already. I don’t know that you can make the claim that the mating market is completely efficient.

The reason that joke is funny is that the economists are ignoring the fact that someone has to be the first person to come across that $100 bill. One is not likely be the first woman to 'come across' a single man in his 30s-40s, who has presumably been 'on the sidewalk' for 10-20+ years.

It's a play on the idea of market efficiency.

From the classical economist perspective, there's no point in trying to beat the market because if it were possible, somebody would have already discovered and exploited it, leaving you unable to do so similarly.

Just like the dating claim that if somebody was desirable, they would have already been taken.

My claim is that both perspectives are wrong because neither market is perfectly efficient. Ironically, taking the approach that they are efficient makes it harder to accomplish either end of beating the market or finding a mate.