Live data from Hacker News

'Speed friending' events

abc.net.au

61–70 of 107 posts

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#61
post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> But ultimately, friendship, like marriage and dating, is work... it's a choice to put in the effort to be someone's friend. But see, that’s just not the case historically speaking. Why has it become so much more effort in recent times?

Except it always was. We belong to a very close knit catholic parish, and it takes constant effort to keep it up. I'm a part of the men's club, and we're always doing work -- like actual work -- to make sure the social aspects of the parish work and people can meet friends. We work to encourage friend making, dating, etc. For example, the men regularly wake up before the first mass (so we're talking before 7 AM) to g…

Literally enslaved? What do you mean by enslaved?

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#62
post #20

Over the past few years on HN I've periodically seen a nice exchange between people saying "if anyone is in Austin and wants to get a beer, let me know." There's normally a response or two. I wonder how many of these people actually meet up? And is HN good (or not) for this purpose? Seems like readers/commenters here could easily have a lot in common, so why couldn't HN be used as a platform for 'speed friending.' Bu…

I wouldn't have thought HN would be particularly good for this purpose. That said though, we just came out of a 77 day lock-down today, so if there's anybody in south-east Melbourne...

Frankston here. Feel free to email me. I’ve been thinking of starting a group for Peninsula/south-east hackers/founders, so, please hit me up If interested.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#63
post #60
post #20

Over the past few years on HN I've periodically seen a nice exchange between people saying "if anyone is in Austin and wants to get a beer, let me know." There's normally a response or two. I wonder how many of these people actually meet up? And is HN good (or not) for this purpose? Seems like readers/commenters here could easily have a lot in common, so why couldn't HN be used as a platform for 'speed friending.' Bu…

I've often thought about having a 'meet' tab in the top bar, alongside 'ask' and 'show' and 'jobs', where people could post meetups. HN has connected a lot of people over the years, both with each other and with significant opportunities. It would be nice to foster more real-world connections. Edit: not a new idea - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1310849

Sounds good, or we could also try having an automatic thread on the 1st/14th(?) of the month, like the hiring ones.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#64
post #61
post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Except it always was. We belong to a very close knit catholic parish, and it takes constant effort to keep it up. I'm a part of the men's club, and we're always doing work -- like actual work -- to make sure the social aspects of the parish work and people can meet friends. We work to encourage friend making, dating, etc. For example, the men regularly wake up before the first mass (so we're talking before 7 AM) to g…

Literally enslaved? What do you mean by enslaved?

Yes. Sponsored to work in this country by his sister. The brother in law owned a few restaurants. My dad was made to work by family pressure. It was reported he was making x amount to the government to keep him here but he never saw the money. He 'worked' for a few years like this

He was driven to various Indian restaurant locations in southern California. Forced to work more than eight hours a day, then driven back to sisters house.

When he married my mother and she immigrated she saw what was going on and ran away and took my dad. We don't talk about the sister any more. I didn't realize my father had two sisters until much later in life.

The scary thing is how open this was. If you're familiar with fancy Indian restaurants in orange, la and Riverside county you'll likely have eaten there. Sister and brother in law were otherwise respectable doctors (including one in public health believe it or not) and otherwise beyond reproach...

There was no hope getting the wages back. My mom and dad started from nothing after several years in the country.

Frankly this sort of slavery is very common, especially among south Asians and is rarely discussed. My parents know a few other full on slaves who were never released to their knowledge. You might ask... Shouldn't we help them... Well we could certainly help them in america, but brother in law is a high caste indian so he would punish the family in India.

There's nothing we could do. This is something the state department and ice need to solve.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#65
post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've often thought about having a 'meet' tab in the top bar, alongside 'ask' and 'show' and 'jobs', where people could post meetups. HN has connected a lot of people over the years, both with each other and with significant opportunities. It would be nice to foster more real-world connections. Edit: not a new idea - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1310849

Sounds good, or we could also try having an automatic thread on the 1st/14th(?) of the month, like the hiring ones.

Yes, that would be a more organic way to start.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#66
post #20

Over the past few years on HN I've periodically seen a nice exchange between people saying "if anyone is in Austin and wants to get a beer, let me know." There's normally a response or two. I wonder how many of these people actually meet up? And is HN good (or not) for this purpose? Seems like readers/commenters here could easily have a lot in common, so why couldn't HN be used as a platform for 'speed friending.' Bu…

The problem with using HN for this is that it doesn't provide any vetting. You don't know if you share enough beliefs to even begin to become friends. You don't necessarily have a shared experience to relate over.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#67

Finding friendship as an adult is an unspoken challenge. I’ve had a little success, but it’s still much more of a challenge than I ever considered when I was younger I recall hearing a story on public radio about a person who moves frequently between RV parks, and said that everyone there makes friends immediately because you don’t have time to feel people out. I’ve wondered if there was something to that - I also wo…

I do urban outdoor living, and it is similar. You can make friends almost instantly in any city on any street.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#68

I've always wanted a "friending" site. Basically a dating site, but to make friends. I work from home, have a couple of online friends that share the same interests as me, but none of my real-world friends do. I tried a couple of these apps, but I always felt the "friend" had ulterior motives. One friend I connected to, tried to sell me on investments, another I'm fairly certain was trying to hook up as if this were…

join a local sports league

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#69
post #66
post #20

Over the past few years on HN I've periodically seen a nice exchange between people saying "if anyone is in Austin and wants to get a beer, let me know." There's normally a response or two. I wonder how many of these people actually meet up? And is HN good (or not) for this purpose? Seems like readers/commenters here could easily have a lot in common, so why couldn't HN be used as a platform for 'speed friending.' Bu…

The problem with using HN for this is that it doesn't provide any vetting. You don't know if you share enough beliefs to even begin to become friends. You don't necessarily have a shared experience to relate over.

IMO, this is fine. You meet up, and even if interests don't collide, at least you discovered someone different than you. I might be lucky and have an easy time making friends, but usually I can easily get along even with people I have little in common.

Re: 'Speed friending' events

#70
post #20

Over the past few years on HN I've periodically seen a nice exchange between people saying "if anyone is in Austin and wants to get a beer, let me know." There's normally a response or two. I wonder how many of these people actually meet up? And is HN good (or not) for this purpose? Seems like readers/commenters here could easily have a lot in common, so why couldn't HN be used as a platform for 'speed friending.' Bu…

I sometimes reach out and people sometimes reach out to me.

There seems to be something missing. In one case, it’s lack of time. In another, it’s that I don’t always check my ProtonMail account.

There’s a bit of a lack of commitment thingy going on from both sides.

Not that there is anything wrong with that, just my observations.

The conversations are usually fun!

Post reply on HN