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Willingness to look stupid
211–220 of 811 posts
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#212One way to prove that he truly doesn't mind looking stupid would be to list times when he risked looking stupid... and it turns out he actually was. It's happened to all of us though we dont like to admit it. I'm sure it's happened to him too and I looked but I didn't see any of those examples listed. Giving only examples of when people thought he was dumb and it turned out he wasn't... that's kind of just a roundabo…
This article does not undermine its own point. In fact, very, very few articles ever undermine their own point. In order to undermine your own point it means you've failed to construct a logical chain of thought. But that is what people do all the time in their daily lives. Maybe children would undermine their own points, or someone posting their first ill-thought comment on Facebook. But I think most people will learn how to construct an argument by their second time publishing one.
In this case, the article is not about 'the joys of being too dumb to breathe'. It's about how 1. looking stupid is not the same as being stupid, and 2. looking stupid can be beneficial in the long run. The author does not need to actually be stupid once in order to support this idea.
And I have to worry if you think he's "bragging" about merely looking stupid, as if that weren't bad enough. Maybe if you identify as stupid I could understand the offense.
To the author, Dan Luu: I like your article and I think you're on the right track!
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#213I think there is wisdom in this, but I also think there is value in some circumstances to making efforts toward behaving in a way that gets respect from others, because then they take you seriously. This can come down to manner of dress and tone of voice. It likely doesn't matter most of the time, but I feel that making an effort to not appear stupid in order to get the person drawing your blood to take you seriously is not a waste of time.
It's true that I often care way too much about looking stupid and this post is really useful for reexamining that mindset and seeing how it's a mistake. Setting my ego aside and doing the best action regardless of how it makes me look would benefit me 99% of the time. BUT, I've had people in charge of some thing I care about dismiss my thoughts or contributions because it appears to them that it's not worth their time to pay attention to me. If I am collaborating on something that I know or care a lot about, I want my questions answered well and I want my contributions taken seriously. Sometimes that means I need to go out of my way to get the respect of this person. Being professional, making efforts to let someone know WHY I am asking a question, and asking revealing questions that benefit others' understanding, are not always a waste of time.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#214One way to prove that he truly doesn't mind looking stupid would be to list times when he risked looking stupid... and it turns out he actually was. It's happened to all of us though we dont like to admit it. I'm sure it's happened to him too and I looked but I didn't see any of those examples listed. Giving only examples of when people thought he was dumb and it turned out he wasn't... that's kind of just a roundabo…
Or it is an unwillingness to be vulnerable to the entire internet. Why? Probably fear of being misinterpreted and pilloried by strangers. It is a justifiable fear. For example, it is easy for people to interpret an imperfect amount of courage as "humble-bragging".
Nowadays it doesn't even end there. You risk getting "cancelled" by social media mobsters.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#215Earlier quoted context omitted.
Ok, if we want to have a meta discussion, let me ask two stupid questions: Why did OP not tell the store clerk why a small box mattered? Why did OP not tell the reader why he didn't tell the clerk?
Why would the clerk need to know that, and why would the reader need to know that? Do you need a justification for buying something from a store? I think that's the lesson here. If you think he needed to give justification, you may still consider him stupid in a way.
Why does the reader need to read this blog post?
We don’t but we think we might learn something or be entertained. Withholding a piece of information that lots of readers are naturally curious about is odd. I like the post & Dan Luu’s writing in general but I’m dying to know the why behind the computer in the smallest box request.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#216Earlier quoted context omitted.
If it happened , he purposefully chose a request that he knew would generate confusion and discomfort in a situation with someone he has power over. It reminds me of the high school bully who fake-punches you, knowing you'll react, and then punishing you for how you react. At best he purposefully made things more difficult than they had to be. She was absolutely right to think that he was a "bozo." I generally strive…
> His disdain for his readers is pretty obvious from the fact that he puts zero effort into readability; there isn't an drop of formatting, it's just a massive wall of text from edge to edge of the browser window. You can see this as disdain, or as respect: I'm free to bring my own CSS to this page, and have things look exactly how I want them too.
Also, it works great in portrait mode e.g on a phone.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#217Is this post about being willing to look stupid or about not being afraid to ask questions? In my own experience, I was more afraid of asking questions because I was afraid it would expose me as not paying attention in class or not being prepared. I was afraid of being embarrassed by the question. I suppose one could say this might also be read as afraid of looking stupid, but stupidity itself is ironically not as simple as some might believe.
I remember the first time I heard the statement: The only stupid question is the question you don't ask. This statement bewildered me, because I thought I might be the one that asked "that" question. If this sounds confusing, I most likely read that statement as "the only stupid question is the the one you shouldn't ask and if you don't know what makes a question stupid, you're probably too stupid to know."
This fear of asking stupid questions made me unwilling to take math courses beyond Geometry. I ended up getting further math education when I started my IT career in 1990. I overcame my fear of asking questions in the course of doing my student teaching assignment before that.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#218I guess the "stupid question" I'd ask of this article is: why don't you reveal your goals or thought process when challenged after asking a question that might be perceived as stupid? Take the Apple Store example: why not explain the reason why you were asking for a product by the size of its box when they responded by saying that size of the box does not map to size of the product? Being open about your goal would'v…
Because the answer might take 10 minutes to explain.
You can always explain in a few words why, even without stating your actual underlying reasons. The clerk doesn't need all the details. This person clearly struggled more than he had to if he would have just provided a reason the clerk could understand. I bet his lack of social skills and perceived "stubbornness" were a much higher contribution factor to the clerk being puzzled and may be even thinking he was being stupid.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#219Lesson learnt from the blog post.: Avoid Jane Street. Hostile interviews are a red flag. It's okay for the interviewer to be unconvinced. But active hostility in a setting like this with a stranger indicates serious problems with the organisation's culture.
Re: Willingness to look stupid
#220I guess the "stupid question" I'd ask of this article is: why don't you reveal your goals or thought process when challenged after asking a question that might be perceived as stupid? Take the Apple Store example: why not explain the reason why you were asking for a product by the size of its box when they responded by saying that size of the box does not map to size of the product? Being open about your goal would'v…
>why don't you reveal your goals or thought process when challenged after asking a question that might be perceived as stupid? People are shallow and often don't spend a lot of time trying to understand other people. You won't always have the luxury to explain yourself.
I truly do not understand this attitude and I can only guess comes from repeated exposure to an unfriendly environment. We're not talking here about exposing your soul to the world, a few words to explain why you want the smaller box would actually save a bunch of time and misunderstandings. Given how society works today, it's just easier.