Strike while the iron is hot I guess, but not sure why you you are being such an ass in your copy, it's kind of a turn off, even if it is super cheap. Maybe it's a trend where if something is super cheap people tend to write in that style, but it kind of erodes trust, unless this is supposed to be a joke site, but the fact that I don't know really hurts your chance to actually get users to want to give you their emai…
Honestly I'd rather have this straightforward no-BS talk than the "take this amazing journey with us" all is happy BS that is much easier to be cynical and skeptical about. What about the copy is false? It seems true to me, if it is blunt. I can't say the same for other website content that is much more bland, but also much more false.
From my perspective the latter associates itself with volatility which isn't fantastic for any kind of hosting.