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Reasons to Quit Social Media

durmonski.com

261–270 of 283 posts

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#261
I find that social media has went in a direction that makes it impossible to curate a 'healthy' feed.

The thing that ruins it for me is the constant negativity. Everybody is upset about something. Often, rightly so, but everybody is also extreme in their views. There is never nuance or healthy discussion. Only anger. Even in innocuous things. For example, follow the official account for a sport on Instagram. If you ever wade into the comments it's a cesspit of anger and negativity. Even if you never get involved (I don't ever comment) it effects how you feel.

Twitter is the worst offender. I can curate a feed of people I enjoy seeing content from. This should be enough, but these people can retweet things I don't want to see. Fortunately Twitter allows you to disable retweets for people. But...Twitter populates your feed with tweets people you follow have liked or tweets Twitter thinks you might like. The majority of the time these are things I don't want to see that cause negative emotions. It makes Twitter unusable without customisation via Chrome extensions or third party apps.

When I look around at my friends, the people that have the least negative outlook on life and seem to be most outgoing and happy are the people that don't actively use social media or who never even signed up. They're the people who don't know what's happening in the news unless there is a major crisis that might actually effect them. It's always hard to know from sure looking in but these people seem to have the right idea.

When I look at it objectively, I get absolutely nothing beneficial out of the most popular social media companies (or reading the news constantly). There is something about it all though that makes it really hard to step away. It's FOMO more than addiction. I never last more than a few days, but they're always better days.

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#263

I find that social media has went in a direction that makes it impossible to curate a 'healthy' feed. The thing that ruins it for me is the constant negativity. Everybody is upset about something. Often, rightly so, but everybody is also extreme in their views. There is never nuance or healthy discussion. Only anger. Even in innocuous things. For example, follow the official account for a sport on Instagram. If you e…

> They're the people who don't know what's happening in the news unless there is a major crisis that might actually effect them.

To that end its increasingly hard to stay informed and sift through the negativity, even in Journalism.

While I havent been on Facebook since 2008 or so, and never signed up for Twitter, i have been on reddit since basically launch and digg before that. I use them less and less becuase, as you point out, it directly correlates to my moods.

But moreover, my long term method of staying informed, a highly curated list of RSS feeds, is also hard to maintain and keep a good mood. I find this method preferable because I am less influenced by "popular" talking points and free to make my own assessment. But just the writing is now so biased and negative I find myself cynically reading multiple sources on a single issue and intrinsically distrusting what almost any of them say at their face unless its backed up or said in another source.

At the end of the day its time consuming. And I waver between just watching a nightly news that i KNOW is extremely biased or sifting through the trash to "find" what i feel is a more accurate depiction.

Of course, this waivers depending on what is occurring. During relative "quiet" times ill watch the news, when large events like the Floyd protests or Afghanistan withdrawal occurs, Ill key into RSS feeds to try and suss out a better picture.

That said....there almost always seems to be some major event these days.

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#264
post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Meanwhile, here you are using words like "regime" in your post here.

What other word should I use to describe a de facto government of America that blatantly, and loudly, refuses to follow the American constitution? This is not my opinion. The courts have agreed with me that religious service is an essential activity, despite many governor's and the federal government's attempts to ban it. Moreover, the current federal regime has unequivocally said that although the Supreme Court itse…

I was mostly pointing out the hypocrisy of what you were saying.

> I feel sorry for those who have to substitute something so vile for something so wholesome.

Here you are trying to proclaim how your church is so wholesome, while you yourself are being an unwholesome person. You're continuing to divide people with your rhetoric. So wholesome.

If you're a representation of your church, I am glad I am not part of your church, or any church for that matter. I've found that this type of behavior you're spewing is quite common and a reason why I hope organized religion finds its deathbed sooner rather than later.

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#265
post #25

I think part of the problem today with individuals trying to figure out how to moderate their social media usage is that it's not clear what specifically within social media constitutes harm. Is it the like/upvote mechanism? Hacker News would constitute harmful social media in that case. But what might be lost is a powerful lever for democratic input in terms of content curation and moderation. My vote for what's mor…

> it's not clear what specifically within social media constitutes harm

Honestly, I think it's just the fact that it's a website that allows you to constantly be exposed to different things that are interesting and stimulating. You can remove upvotes, scrolling, all you want, but you'll still have the IV drip of novel content. Constant exposure to novelty is harmful, I think. We weren't designed to have our minds blown every 5 minutes.

Spend a few hours a day having your brain washed with memes and fascinating articles (or at least the titles), and your brain will re-calibrate to this as the new normal, and anything less stimulating (reading books etc.) will feel boring. Constant novelty makes the world seem unstable and makes me feel flighty and anxious compared to more mundane activities, so the mental health connection is no surprise.

Hacker News is less stimulating than other social media because it's text-based, it's about more serious topics, it's well moderated, and it doesn't abuse addictive techniques like infinite scrolling. However, I bet many people here will attest that they sometimes close HN only to open it right back up again. Closing a website only to open it immediately because you are bored is a sign that you subconsciously believe the website is one of the only interesting things you can do. Either your brain is right, and everything besides HN, reddit, Twitter, etc. is actually boring, or these things are just so artificially stimulating that using them causes everything else to feel boring in comparison. I'll let you decide which you think sounds more accurate.

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#266
post #179
post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Is it the like/upvote mechanism? Hacker News would constitute harmful social media in that case. The way I've started to look at it is that all social media has some harmful and some beneficial aspects, but the nexus of identity-based (vs topic-based like HN) social media with upvote/like functionality is the most problematic for people struggling with identity and self worth. Even as someone established enough not…

Hacker news is not social media. I have never recognized a user/username in between two sessions. And I would probably miss the mythical PG if he showed up in a thread. I don't know his handle anyways. Sometimes I'm made aware that a relevant "celebrity" is present in the thread but that's when people act obviously star struck like "oh thank you for that seminal paper back in '15". So nothing social going on here, ju…

There are different kind of social medias, like there are 50 shades of gray. Any media that have network effects and a positive feedback loop is a social media. I'd say HN is one of the healthier social medias.

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#267
post #175

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Is being racist against the law? Why would someone tell law enforcement?

Racism can be considered hate speech, which is illegal in places with no right to free speech such as most countries in Europe. For example: https://www.report-it.org.uk/reporting_internet_hate_crime

Incitement to racial hatred, done publicly, can be held illegal if it crosses certain thresholds. I don’t think this means Europeans don’t have free speech.

Consider both:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_free_speech_exce...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Privacy_laws_of_the_United_Sta...

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#268

Earlier quoted context omitted.

But don't wikis commonly have a "Talk" section or similar? The pages that are posted and edited would surely fall under author-generated content.

I believe a lot of the internet has social aspects. Is it possible that the "social" aspects of this media operate on a sliding scale? I understand the point that literally any website could be thought of as "user generated"... I've personally made quite a few websites. But the level of interaction and the modalities of how I and a lot of folks use things isn't as interactive as, say, twitter. So, perhaps for some us…

The social aspects absolutely work on a sliding scale. I completely agree. But I don't think that the amount or variety of social engagement is what really contributes to something being classified as "social media".

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#269
post #264

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What other word should I use to describe a de facto government of America that blatantly, and loudly, refuses to follow the American constitution? This is not my opinion. The courts have agreed with me that religious service is an essential activity, despite many governor's and the federal government's attempts to ban it. Moreover, the current federal regime has unequivocally said that although the Supreme Court itse…

I was mostly pointing out the hypocrisy of what you were saying. > I feel sorry for those who have to substitute something so vile for something so wholesome. Here you are trying to proclaim how your church is so wholesome, while you yourself are being an unwholesome person. You're continuing to divide people with your rhetoric. So wholesome. If you're a representation of your church, I am glad I am not part of your…

This has nothing to do with my church in particular but has to do with the idea of a church. Honestly society benefits if people were members of churches other than my own as well. Even a church not my own would foster community and hopefully want people to become better. And provide a community where people can have true connection

And yes, social media is vile. I'm sorry you don't see that. There is nothing dismissive about calling a piece of software vile. Do you see how confused you've become under it's influence? I literally called a software service vile, after decades of published studies and news reports indicating it's I'll effects, and I've been accused of fostering division among people.

This is the great problem with social media. It confuses fake for real, virtual for physical, and computer programs for human beings.

Re: Reasons to Quit Social Media

#270
post #203

> After the habit of scrolling and liking wears off, you suddenly find yourself in a joyful place. A quieter, calmer, less demanding place where you don’t want to know what others are doing. You focus on what you want to do. But what if you don't know what you want to do? I feel like this post was written from the perspective of someone who already has their own life goals sorted out, and social media was clearly act…

You won't find yourself by seeking distraction. You need to eliminate distractions and feel the pain of boredom, which will motivate you to try things.

As a child I used to complain about going to bed because I "can't sleep". My father would often say, "well, you usually need to close your eyes for it to work".
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