How to Escape Loneliness
whatsonyourmind.substack.com
How to Escape Loneliness
1–10 of 48 posts
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#2It's weird how everything in this article seems true and logical, but at the same time it rings hollow and I feel like the author is missing an important point. From experience, for some people it will be hard to connect to most people, and thus you'll end up more lonely than usual most of the time. If at the same time you're a good listener and generous with your time, it can get exhausting to have lots of one-sided relationships.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#3I think it is also cultural. Some cultures are more socially engaged than others, particularly through religion, and holidays.
Would the individualism of American culture contribute to loneliness?
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#4The American lifestyle is engineered specifically to fit a style that, whether intentional or not, promotes deep and debilitating loneliness.
You have to deliberately live in a very abnormal way to avoid it.
Most Americans have very little contact with strangers outside of their workplace. It's a real tragedy.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#5It's weird how everything in this article seems true and logical, but at the same time it rings hollow and I feel like the author is missing an important point. From experience, for some people it will be hard to connect to most people, and thus you'll end up more lonely than usual most of the time. If at the same time you're a good listener and generous with your time, it can get exhausting to have lots of one-sided…
Absolutely, being a lonely person that’s also a good listener is just the worst. You expect people to show at least some percentage of the interest that you have in their life (by listening to them). But my experience has been that the vast majority of people don’t listen at all. Note that listening != hearing.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#6The American lifestyle is engineered specifically to fit a style that, whether intentional or not, promotes deep and debilitating loneliness. You have to deliberately live in a very abnormal way to avoid it. Most Americans have very little contact with strangers outside of their workplace. It's a real tragedy.
I spent 3 weeks in Germany a country not know for talkative or friendly people and I had more real and friendly conversations with others than three years in here in the US.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#7I have a little hack to fight loneliness; shitposting on HN. Quirky comments get the party started with these elitist HN types.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#8I think it is also cultural. Some cultures are more socially engaged than others, particularly through religion, and holidays. Would the individualism of American culture contribute to loneliness?
> Would the individualism of American culture contribute to loneliness?
It does. People spend too much time on self-help and individual pursuits to actually hang around and waste time.
Wasting time in a "Time is money" society is contradictory.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#9It's weird how everything in this article seems true and logical, but at the same time it rings hollow and I feel like the author is missing an important point. From experience, for some people it will be hard to connect to most people, and thus you'll end up more lonely than usual most of the time. If at the same time you're a good listener and generous with your time, it can get exhausting to have lots of one-sided…
Absolutely, being a lonely person that’s also a good listener is just the worst. You expect people to show at least some percentage of the interest that you have in their life (by listening to them). But my experience has been that the vast majority of people don’t listen at all. Note that listening != hearing.
I saw this in The Three-Body Problem:
> Everyone likes to reminisce, but no one wants to listen, and everyone feels annoyed when someone else tells a story.
That quote really resonated with me, as I realized how true it was for my interactions in the last few months.
Re: How to Escape Loneliness
#10The American lifestyle is engineered specifically to fit a style that, whether intentional or not, promotes deep and debilitating loneliness. You have to deliberately live in a very abnormal way to avoid it. Most Americans have very little contact with strangers outside of their workplace. It's a real tragedy.
And I think the young male culture of gaming is only making it worse. (Observations from my 20 yr old college student son and his friends.)