61–70 of 177 posts
Fragility comes from insecurity. Insecurity is both objective and subjective. On different days you may feel more or less secure. To not care too much about yourself is the first step. The world is what it is and our desires are just that. Desires. Easy to forget that the world owes or cares. It does not. Luckily it does not care about anyone else. We only have this life to live. “We have two lives, and the second be…
I don’t know if this is a mental hack or not, but I found years ago that if I mentally sing the comments (that I know would upset me otherwise), it totally removes the emotional impact of other people’s negative writing. When I was contemplating why this might be so effective, I was reminded that satire of old often involved singing to point out other peoples absurdity. When you think about how much the powerful fear…
1. https://www.stuttering.co.nz/news/why-dont-we-stutter-when-w...
As I get older, the less I identify as my current state and the more I identify with the person who transitions through states. My change in perspective has reduced my anxieties and anger significantly. "This too shall pass" and all that. The more of my self image is focused on superficial things, the more I will take things personally. What we are angry about tends to be a reflection of ourselves more than the curre…
I've had this experience myself. Actually, your description is so much kinder than mine that I think I will adopt it. What I have said up until now is that as I've gotten older, my emotional level has declined very substantially, especially in the last ten years. It's like the volume got turned down. Very few things bother me, and very few things excite me. I'd associated it until now with a sort of depersonalization…
Pro tip from me: this mental model sounded nice in bad times. But I would not follow it again any more today, and I would say you have an endless credit of emotions if you want it. Saving your emotions for “the day when you need it” does not make sense any more to me and makes me more happy.
As I get older, the less I identify as my current state and the more I identify with the person who transitions through states. My change in perspective has reduced my anxieties and anger significantly. "This too shall pass" and all that. The more of my self image is focused on superficial things, the more I will take things personally. What we are angry about tends to be a reflection of ourselves more than the curre…
I've had this experience myself. Actually, your description is so much kinder than mine that I think I will adopt it. What I have said up until now is that as I've gotten older, my emotional level has declined very substantially, especially in the last ten years. It's like the volume got turned down. Very few things bother me, and very few things excite me. I'd associated it until now with a sort of depersonalization…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Aristoteles wrote this is the goal IIRC. In buddhism they aim for something similar, neither being swayed by your desires nor fears, stay calm enables being able to act instead only reacting to external stimuli on autopilot. Nothing wrong with it IMSO.
> IMSO In my stoic opinion?
Interesting how the author avoided sex and intimacy in his "list of common universal needs".
Neither is a universal need. Plenty of single hermits are perfectly happy hermitting alone.
Fragility comes from insecurity. Insecurity is both objective and subjective. On different days you may feel more or less secure. To not care too much about yourself is the first step. The world is what it is and our desires are just that. Desires. Easy to forget that the world owes or cares. It does not. Luckily it does not care about anyone else. We only have this life to live. “We have two lives, and the second be…
Throw-away deepities. https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Deepity
Earlier quoted context omitted.
I've had this experience myself. Actually, your description is so much kinder than mine that I think I will adopt it. What I have said up until now is that as I've gotten older, my emotional level has declined very substantially, especially in the last ten years. It's like the volume got turned down. Very few things bother me, and very few things excite me. I'd associated it until now with a sort of depersonalization…
I had the strategy/mindset that when you are born you get a fixed credit on how you want to spend your emotions in life. When you are young you still have plenty of credit so you spend it on anger that other kids have a nicer laptop or whatever. When you get older you realize that you only have that much credit left to spend wisely on emotions in your life. Pro tip from me: this mental model sounded nice in bad times…
How we notice and react to our emotions is a choice. Having emotions is not a choice.
As I get older, the less I identify as my current state and the more I identify with the person who transitions through states. My change in perspective has reduced my anxieties and anger significantly. "This too shall pass" and all that. The more of my self image is focused on superficial things, the more I will take things personally. What we are angry about tends to be a reflection of ourselves more than the curre…
I'd like to think I'm maturing and becoming wise.
But I suspect it's really the falling testosterone levels that come with age...