Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

news.ycombinator.com

211–220 of 265 posts

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#211
in your present circumstance you cannot have it both ways i.e. money as well as enjoyable work. You have to compromise and let go of something either money or your time at work. My suggestion is to let go of money take the 2/3rd pay cut for enjoyble job. I was in similar situation few years ago with golden handcuffs but somehow i just quit one day without thinking much about it, that was the best decision of my life, initially i thought i made a mistake, everyone else i.e. colleagues, bosses, friends, siblings also thought it was a mistake but after few months i was amazed how i was able to live with that miserable job for so many years. I also realized that money wasn't that much of an issue as i assumed it to be. My health improved, my relationships improved, my perspective in life improved and my happiness and contentment in life in general also improved. Moreover when i look at people making billions i no longer feel that have anything more than me , they can just experience some exotic things that money can buy but ulitmately what is the point of that experience? happiness? if you are happy nothing else matters. Set your priorities right.

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#212
My first and last employers damn near killed my passion too. It was just specific employers though. Consider switching jobs before switching careers. London is also its own thing. There are far more relaxing places to earn a living.

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#214
It seems to me that you're in a place for which you've worked hard in your early adulthood, a place you no longer want. Where you're struggling (based off your post and your replies) is that in any direction you look - it's going to take more hard work to get there. Like you're saying: I've worked so hard up till now - surely there's an easier way?

I can easily see how your CS PhD, however impressive, doesn't actually confer a lot of practical skills for a different job. It's the nature of PhDs. It'll look good on paper for a quant or FAANG job, but probably doesn't help much beyond, right?

And the same kind of applies to quant jobs: the level of maths in interviews is different from the day-to-day drudgery, so not only does it feel like getting a similar-paying job will be pointless, it's also hard. And getting other high-paying tangible skills (like web development) is also hard!

To me, the early retirement is a fantasy people paint when they dream of escaping everyday life. What most people dreaming of retirement want is not to be out of productive society, but FREEDOM. They want financial freedom to choose what they do and where. But that's not the same as not having to work.

So the metric you're optimizing for - money - is different to the metric you're actually after - freedom. Think of it this way - if you could work from anywhere, would you still mind working as much? If you could also manage you're time so that you meet deadlines but otherwise free to set your day - meditate in the morning, take a walk in the nearby hills - would you still mind working as much?

If you're answering No to these questions, early retirement is literally standing in your way of achieving your goals in life.

(Just as a note, as all these things are tied up together - even if you had a fully remote job you're assuming you're tied to London as long as your partner works there? Because that's a whole other kettle of fish, which has nothing to do with your job and cannot be fixed by it.)

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#215
post #181

I am seeing a lot of comments here about depression, though it doesn't ring true to me - the situation you're in is one that myself and a lot of the other comments can understand from our own experience of similar situations and it really does suck. My take is that you're feeling the way you do in response to the situation you find yourself in, and perhaps due to the loss of control and ensuing hopelessness. As a fir…

> Final thought: money matters come up a lot in your post. You don't have to measure yourself in that dimension if you don't want to anymore. You can add a great deal of value to the world without $$$ being the base unit, and/or have a lot of fun! Reminds me: "But sir, I don't want money; I just want a big home with a big garden!". Not sure where I heard it.

Yeah, fair point. Money is important, but in tech it's unlikely to be the sticking point in the way it is for some others. e.g. my relatively normal rate as a freelancer has me earning over 10X what my mother earns as a receptionist (pre-ax ofc).

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#216
I don't get it - are you are woman? Then just stop this nonsense with "partner", "travelling the world". Get married, have kids, and you'll be more than happy that you have a good paying job that allows you to afford the kids, kindergarten and so on. You're 34, there is nothing else in life behind the corner, that's it, don't run away from it. Trust me, this is the source of your pain.

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#217

You might find working at Google utterly meaningless (I mostly do) but the pay would be excellent and more importantly you would have the potential to work remotely... at least 2/5 days a week and potentially fully remotely as well. And that's just Google. There's lots of companies offering full remote at this point. With CS and stats in your resume you are well set. Stop selling yourself short. It sounds like you're…

> 99% of what we do as engineers is utterly meaningless. That's why we don't do it for free.

That's a really good way to put it. Thanks for the new perspective.

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#218

Finance in London is very hot at the moment, there is a lot of hiring going on and substantial upside available for talented individuals. Why not start speaking to recruiters and see if you can find a better and more exciting team? Stay way from banks, focus on funds and HFTs. PnL wise, a lot of firms are starting up coming off a bumper 2020 year. It sounds like fundamentally your problem is being in a bad team/firm…

What sort of quant finance is hot in London? It hasnt been hot in London for years?

Also whats wrong with banks, this is usually where the majority of quant jobs are?

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#219

Due to the pandemic there is a lot of remote work available these days. You can probably find a freelance gig or a full-time position with a North America-based company that pays better than most London-based positions. And I don't mean Google, but one of the thousands of smaller companies. Often their interviews have almost no technical aspect, it's just chatting. At least that would be a partial solution.

Where do you find these?

Re: Ask HN: I feel trapped in my job and city

#220

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Google people make 200k starting as Jr devs so I'm assuming 400k. Esp with PhD. Agreed not super clear what's going on.

Google juniors are more like £40k in london. Jobs over £100k are not the norm, even in finance in london. The awful london housing market (small market, people do NOT sell) starts around £320k for a terrible studio. Banks nowaways tend to loan around 4-4.5x gross salary. (And you need a good chunk already saved, which is also hard as tax and rent is high) £100k salary doesn't buy an average 1 bed in london (and you'r…

>Google juniors are more like £40k in london.

Are you sure this is up to date? I thought they were 90k - 100k GBP for fresh grad

Post reply on HN