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Dating in Delhi when you're poor

reuters.com

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Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#251

Post by baybal2 »

ramraj07 wrote: post #181
DoreenMichele wrote: post #83

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Many years ago, I read of a study that measured poverty not in terms of income but with metrics like "How many meals per day do you get?" and "What kind of shelter do you have?" It concluded that less than 1/2 of one percent of Americans were poor by standards in India. When I've repeated that online, on at least one occasion someone who lived in India got mad at me for supposedly promoting negative stereotypes and t…

Grew up in india, spent my twenties in the US, and now back in India. I can give you some potential explanation: Even though the poor and lower middle class make abjectly low amounts of money, the upper middle class and the rich actually make money comparable to most developed countries. This is reflected in the real estate prices (Chennai, the fourth largest city, has prices comparable to Brooklyn). I can make 200k…

> Grew up in india, spent my twenties in the US, and now back in India. I can give you some potential explanation:

What did make you to move back to India?

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#252

Post by naruvimama »

dartharva wrote: post #245
naruvimama wrote: post #244

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Wealthy countries are struggling with the impact of teen moms, single mothers & alcoholic/druggie parents. In countries like India with 1/10th to 1/25th the percapita income such social restrictions are a necessity.

> Wealthy countries are struggling with the impact of teen moms, single mothers & alcoholic/druggie parents. Are they, really? Do you have a source? I'm willing to bet the suffering these social restrictions put on young women and men in general is several times that faced by the outliers you're conveniently pointing to. Also willing to bet these cases of teen moms and alcoholic parents will be much more prevalent am…

> Also willing to bet these cases of teen moms and alcoholic parents will be much more prevalent among the poorer classes in India than in the west in general.

Precisely why the social restrictions exist. Alcohol has been a taboo in most parts of the country until the recent 2 decades with "westernisation".

> Are they, really? Do you have a source?

About 25% of children in the US are in single parent families. By itself isn't bad, but the cascading effects on society may be significant.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#253

Post by archibaldJ »

seestraw wrote: post #222
pm90 wrote: post #213

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The author is convinced that the couple’s life sucks. Objectively, their life does kinda suck. The woman is living in a slum and cleaning houses for a living, earning very little for a lot of exhausting labor. The man is doing little better. They have to be creative in finding places to just hang out with each other, which is really the foundation for any relationship. This isn't a judgement call on their relative…

I agree with some of your points. And kudos to the journalists for exploring this topic. However, look at the following: “She’s the first woman from her family who makes her own money.” To her, that might be an amazing success. Getting out of your default path and making it on your own is a big thing. Why do we need to emphasize that she can’t afford to eat at a Zomato restaurant? Is that a minimum bar for life being…

In my humble opinion it all boils down to cost, and I don't mean monetary cost. I mean real cost. The cost of attention from a computational perspective.

What you described traces its roots in sensationalism, which is useful to catch people's attention (or so the piece becomes memorable for them).

As a soceity, we are always seeking to lower the cost of obtaining stimuli and qualia[1]. Combining this with the fact that people's lives become ever more complex, the cost of attention increases. Among the masses, short-attention span is now the norm.

Therefore it is important to practise mindfulness. And this is why I believe psychedelics and meditation are fundemental for us to transition into a more sensible soceity.

[1]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28020031

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#254

Post by sneak »

seestraw wrote: post #197

The author is convinced that the couple’s life sucks. He/she is writing from a point of view of superiority - “look, this is what they’re lacking, they can’t afford a Rs.8000 dinner”. To a billionaire, my software engineer life will look miserable - “They have to go eat at Panera and Olive Garden. For their employer, a nice dineout costs $5000.” Can we stop looking down on people because they cannot afford what’s nor…

These women get beaten by their families for having a mobile phone, or outright killed for choosing the wrong partner.

I think perhaps you got the wrong thing from this article.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#255

Post by ascar »

anovikov wrote: post #204

Seriously, a dinner for two costs $125 in India in a place with $400 average monthly income? This is what it would cost here in Cyprus, short of really nice places in Nicosia or Limassol, and the monthly income is 5x as much. Maybe $200 in the very nicest of places. I'm a developer and make in mid-six figures, and whenever i see a $125 bill including tips, i start to feel like "oh, this is pricey".

You surely meant five figures and not ~500,000?

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#256

Post by seestraw »

sneak wrote: post #254
seestraw wrote: post #197

The author is convinced that the couple’s life sucks. He/she is writing from a point of view of superiority - “look, this is what they’re lacking, they can’t afford a Rs.8000 dinner”. To a billionaire, my software engineer life will look miserable - “They have to go eat at Panera and Olive Garden. For their employer, a nice dineout costs $5000.” Can we stop looking down on people because they cannot afford what’s nor…

These women get beaten by their families for having a mobile phone, or outright killed for choosing the wrong partner. I think perhaps you got the wrong thing from this article.

Actually, I’m saying we should focus on such issues instead of devoting just one line to them.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#257

Post by dartharva »

naruvimama wrote: post #252
dartharva wrote: post #245

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Wealthy countries are struggling with the impact of teen moms, single mothers & alcoholic/druggie parents. Are they, really? Do you have a source? I'm willing to bet the suffering these social restrictions put on young women and men in general is several times that faced by the outliers you're conveniently pointing to. Also willing to bet these cases of teen moms and alcoholic parents will be much more prevalent am…

> Also willing to bet these cases of teen moms and alcoholic parents will be much more prevalent among the poorer classes in India than in the west in general. Precisely why the social restrictions exist. Alcohol has been a taboo in most parts of the country until the recent 2 decades with "westernisation". > Are they, really? Do you have a source? About 25% of children in the US are in single parent families. By its…

But how do you know these social restrictions prevent those vices? If anything, not having the freedom to choose one's spouse is bound to produce worse effects. A child would be much better off in a single-parent family than in a toxic household where the couple was basically forced together by their parents. Most of those 25% of American single-parent children live considerable better and happier than their Indian counterparts.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#258

Post by taauji »

That is a misleading article. Nobody spends that much amount of money on a single "date night" or "movie night" unless you are an elite. This article is again a low effort attempt to sell western people news that fits their narrow knowledge base.

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#259

Post by dartharva »

chana_masala wrote: post #91
Andrew_nenakhov wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I disagree. It is the best thing they have in their lives. Also, you don't really need money to be happy. I used to have no money at all when I was young and still had great time with girls.

I'd rather practice Brahmachariya and be married

>practice Brahmachariya and be married

???

You do know Brahmacharya means celibacy, right?

Re: Dating in Delhi when you're poor

#260

Post by anovikov »

ascar wrote: post #255
anovikov wrote: post #204

Seriously, a dinner for two costs $125 in India in a place with $400 average monthly income? This is what it would cost here in Cyprus, short of really nice places in Nicosia or Limassol, and the monthly income is 5x as much. Maybe $200 in the very nicest of places. I'm a developer and make in mid-six figures, and whenever i see a $125 bill including tips, i start to feel like "oh, this is pricey".

You surely meant five figures and not ~500,000?

I meant annual income in my context ofc.
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