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Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

bbc.com

51–60 of 203 posts

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#51
post #40

Can be summarized by the quote they give > Social connections are a basic human need… Being an introvert doesn't mean you don't want to socialise at all - Danièle Gubler and Katja Schlegel

Strong disagree on it being a basic human need. I've had months without socializing and didn't think much of it. In fact, I was really happy during those times.

I've had those same months, and didn't feel different. Once that turns into something like 18 months, I started feeling it.

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#52
post #39
post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd like to hear more about your life experience - how much human contact do you have on a weekly basis?

I have daily human contact online at work. I've never met one of my coworkers in the flesh. In meatspace, I drive into a tiny village once a week to get mail at the post office, usually talking to nobody. Every other week I go to a more distant small town and hit the grocery and hardware store, and pass a few words with a clerk or three. It isn't unusual for a month to go by without speaking in the flesh with anyone…

> Then the loneliness becomes unbearable and I retreat.

I don't understand how this goes. Could you describe your experience with more details ?

> I built a desk a couple of years ago and I'm still waiting to show it off to somebody.

Well, you could paste a picture here :).

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#53
post #9

I'm a physically and socially isolated introvert in a rural county and have been working from home for a decade. About the only difference for me was the occasional need to put on a mask before walking in a store. My greatest inconvenience was very minor: I was turned away from a convenience store for not having a mask with me. Early in the lockdowns I made a trip to the closest big city for a dentist appointment and…

So while I don't count myself as a winner in this, it does seem to be a substantial win to not be one of the

Same. I was extremely fortunate that this disaster and my work, family, and financial setup meant things had little impact on me. It hit my kids harder socially, but educationally they ended up much better because they had a highly educated retired family member as a neighbor. They did and did their remote schooling there, with help available at all times to extent far beyond what 1 teacher with 25 kids can do in a classroom.

That was extremely fortunate, especially seeing other kids in the school whose families basically had no choice but to lose a year of school-- but the way things are functioning, they're still moving up a grade and schools all over the country are going to be having problems with a significant % of students who not only didn't learn anything, but are 1.5 years away from the last time they were even in the habit of having to learn.

"Not a loser" is indeed winning in this case.

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#54
post #39
post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd like to hear more about your life experience - how much human contact do you have on a weekly basis?

I have daily human contact online at work. I've never met one of my coworkers in the flesh. In meatspace, I drive into a tiny village once a week to get mail at the post office, usually talking to nobody. Every other week I go to a more distant small town and hit the grocery and hardware store, and pass a few words with a clerk or three. It isn't unusual for a month to go by without speaking in the flesh with anyone…

> It isn't a good way to live.

Why do you choose to live like this. I am asking because wht you are describing here stuff of my dreams. I even bought a piece of land in rural colorado during the pandemic that I plan to start building in september.

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#55
post #38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Agree! One of the most harmful beliefs about the concept of intro-/extroversion is that it is something you are and not something you do. Many people limit themselves massively because of how they've labeled themselves. Especially in "strong introverts", the label is often used as a convenient excuse for not going through the often painful process of trying to improve their confidence skills and social skills. "I'm a…

Aye. It’s funny, perusing the other comments in this thread, how attached people are to these labels, which really have no factual basis at all. We choose the stories that we tell about ourselves; yet we act as if the stories chose us.

The stories we tell about ourselves also massively shape ourselves. We always act how we think, so people should choose stories that are beneficial instead of detrimental.

"I'm a introvert who can't be comfortable around other people" and "My social skills and confidence aren't where they should be, I need to keep working on that" are two similar stories with totally different outcomes.

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#56
post #19

The past year has proven how introverted I am. The best days of my life are the ones where I don't see or speak to another human being. Blessed days.

What do you do all day?

Whatever I want, without the looming, and the questions, and the demands that I assist someone with something.

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#57
One thing I have missed as an introvert is the "people watching" aspect. I don't need to be at the centre of things and don't enjoy big social occasions, but do enjoy walking around a bustling city, taking in the atmosphere. It feels like the world has stood still (or at least slowed) and that has made just my normal day-to-day less interesting. Introverts aren't disinterested in society - they just like to experience it differently to extraverts.

Re: Introverts didn't 'win' lockdown

#60
post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have daily human contact online at work. I've never met one of my coworkers in the flesh. In meatspace, I drive into a tiny village once a week to get mail at the post office, usually talking to nobody. Every other week I go to a more distant small town and hit the grocery and hardware store, and pass a few words with a clerk or three. It isn't unusual for a month to go by without speaking in the flesh with anyone…

> It isn't a good way to live. Why do you choose to live like this. I am asking because wht you are describing here stuff of my dreams. I even bought a piece of land in rural colorado during the pandemic that I plan to start building in september.

Yea, I was going to say, OP's living situation sounds like a paradise to me. Also saving up for the big piece of rural land in the middle of nowhere. It sure beats commuting hours from a cramped home or apartment stacked up in a city with thousands of others, to a cramped office building where you sit literally shoulder to shoulder with hundreds of others and try to do work all day.
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