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Kids need freedom, too

persuasion.community

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Re: Kids need freedom, too

#2
I'm having this issue a bit with my wife. I want my 9-yr old daughter to go to the playground a couple blocks away on her own; my wife is reluctant.

My argument is that it's statistically very safe, especially in our neighborhood, and that we and her older brothers all did similar things. Her argument is that a girl needs to be more cautious than a boy, and that although she knows it's unlikely anything bad would happen, it would destroy us if it did.

We're planning to compromise by letting her do it, but only after we get her her first phone.

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#3
Large businesses have the biggest lobbying groups so their agendas get the most attention, though editorial campaigns, laws, etc.

There are a few groups concerned with personal freedom, and so personal freedom is not forgotten, but is deprioritized over what business wants.

Children have almost no advocates I would argue. The only people lobbying "on their behalf" are trying to gain power in some way, using fear, etc (similar tactics are used to restrict business and personal feedom).

So it's no surprise kids get the short end of the stick.

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#5
Removing the freedom for kids to move around alone is a huge social inefficiency. Where kids just walk to school alone or walk to a park to play with friends alone kids are not that expensive to maintain. But with constant supervision needed then parents need to drive the kids to their destinations and either stay with them there or drop them of at some paid event where the organizer supervises the kids.

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#6
I think the problem "de-risking" childhood is only an instance of the bigger problem of what Roger Scruton calls "Risk De-aggregation". Risk Deaggregation is taking a single point of risk (and its associated metric), and optimizing to reduce that risk as if it exists in isolation from other risks. I.e. Risk occurs in aggregate, not as individual threats. Risk deaggregation happens everywhere from Climate Change policy, to Covid, to children.

I think this type of risk deaggregation arises from the fact that in a sufficiently complicated space (climate, economy, children, etc) there are really only two heuristics:

1) Ignore all but a manageable number of variables and optimize for them

2) Recognize a larger number of necessary variable, acknowledge there is no optimal solution, and balance the trade offs between those variables. [0]

Heuristic 1 is the easiest, requires no nuance, and seems the type of thing our political and media class love to latch onto. Heuristic 2 actually requires admitting you don't get everything you want, or at least the things you want will cost you something you dont.

[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satisficing

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#7
I went back to my old school for a tour/"try and get Alumni to donate money" event.

I was shocked at the changes, especially in the "Elf and Safety" (Health and Safety). Pupils are required to wear body and head padding for Rugby. Junior pupils in primary school cannot do full contact tackles until they are older in high school.

I wasn't the most sporty at school, but I appreciated the rough and tumble of rugby, football and military cadets.

Coupled with the digitisation and removal of old whiteboards/blackboards, made the place seem less-tangible and some sort of controlled environment..

Changed times I guess...

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#8
post #2

I'm having this issue a bit with my wife. I want my 9-yr old daughter to go to the playground a couple blocks away on her own; my wife is reluctant. My argument is that it's statistically very safe, especially in our neighborhood, and that we and her older brothers all did similar things. Her argument is that a girl needs to be more cautious than a boy, and that although she knows it's unlikely anything bad would hap…

I would be much more concerned about some well intentioned rando calling the cops on you because there's a child unattended.

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#9
post #2

I'm having this issue a bit with my wife. I want my 9-yr old daughter to go to the playground a couple blocks away on her own; my wife is reluctant. My argument is that it's statistically very safe, especially in our neighborhood, and that we and her older brothers all did similar things. Her argument is that a girl needs to be more cautious than a boy, and that although she knows it's unlikely anything bad would hap…

Parents today are overprotective (this includes me!) and don't realize that it actually damages their kids. I was 5-years-old when my parents would just drop me off to the kindergarten and then I was on my own pretty much the whole day after kindergarten finishes in the afternoon. I would go to different classes kilometers away, crossing roads, etc. and it was common practice. I don't think kids get injured less today than when I was a kid. Also, my parents would send me to the store to buy them beer or cigarettes - all you needed back then to either bring a handwritten note from your parent or for the salesperson to know you and know your parents - I don't drink, I don't smoke. We always underestimate the power of the forbidden fruit! Leaving kids on their own makes them more responsible and independent.

I highly recommend Free-Range Kids [0]!

[0]: https://www.freerangekids.com/

Re: Kids need freedom, too

#10
post #2

I'm having this issue a bit with my wife. I want my 9-yr old daughter to go to the playground a couple blocks away on her own; my wife is reluctant. My argument is that it's statistically very safe, especially in our neighborhood, and that we and her older brothers all did similar things. Her argument is that a girl needs to be more cautious than a boy, and that although she knows it's unlikely anything bad would hap…

Given what we have learned regarding the catholic church, boy scouts and penn state athletics program. I'd say young boys have just as much to fear if not more.

That said I'm with you on her walking to the park.

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