This was a thing (and still is) in Europe. US ridiculed them, and now it's here.
Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
131–140 of 1001 posts
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#132I've got two nephews aged 34 and 32 who still live at home and play video games all the time and rarely leave their rooms. Neither has ever had a job that lasted more than a month or so. Neither ever learned to drive even though they live in a town with little or no public transit. They haven't had any education beyond high school. They seem wholly unprepared to navigate life without their parents. It's a slow motion…
I know someone who used to fit that description quite well and then apparently made it out at some point between 35 and 40. Seems like there is always room for a surprise improvement left.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#133Earlier quoted context omitted.
It's certainly believable that women don't enjoy dating apps, but I think it's difficult to make the case that it's equally hard for them (in terms of successfully getting a date) when they have thousands of matches and many men I know have none.
Women are paying a high price in the online dating world. It’s preying on their weakness the same way porn does for men. Most women don’t want to sleep around and have a large number of partners. But tinder leads them to believe that they can find an unrealistic partner. And they get hurt by the small percentage of men that play the online dating game well. Women need a lot more data and time to evaluate a potential…
Maybe women are paying the price, bit it is men on HN who complain and bitch constantly. Most women are not on tinder anyway.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#134This seems like a kind rational economic choice. If there are not enough good jobs that can support independent living, providing for a spouse, buying a home or raising a family, then staying home with the easy accomplishment of video games makes sense. Most people never live outside their home states and can't afford to leave the support network of their family and close friends. If you grew up in a medium or high c…
Until this year, I lived in the same place I grew up, one of the highest cost-of-living places on the planet: NYC. Until the pandemic, the goal of owning a home did seem totally out of reach for me, even with my remote SV tech job salary. Then I moved to an unincorporated community in TN, because NYC's lockdowns, mask mandates, and general cultural decay was too much for me to bear - financially, emotionally, and eve…
Be proud, you made a very wise and healthy decision.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#135I see this on the fringes of those within my circle of friends. I know one man in this age cohort who doesn't seem to have a job, just plays video games all the time, and I don't get it. But one thing I think about is what he has been exposed to: this is what he knows. I don't think this individual I'm speaking of was raised with anything differently. In this same light, as I believe the two concepts are directly rel…
Well, I cannot speak for Tinder, but you have probably seen the stats from the now-deleted OKCupid blogs. I worked in a dating service pre-Intarwebs and the dynamics are almost exactly the same, just lacking only the "instant" factor of the Internet, plus the rather expanded pool. As someone who entered people's "preferences" versus their "must-haves," certain trends emerged. To be politic about it, those trends did not favor men.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#136I've got two nephews aged 34 and 32 who still live at home and play video games all the time and rarely leave their rooms. Neither has ever had a job that lasted more than a month or so. Neither ever learned to drive even though they live in a town with little or no public transit. They haven't had any education beyond high school. They seem wholly unprepared to navigate life without their parents. It's a slow motion…
I know someone who used to fit that description quite well and then apparently made it out at some point between 35 and 40. Seems like there is always room for a surprise improvement left.
Yeah, well, maybe. But currently they don't seem to have any motivation which is a prerequisite to improvement. I think their parents should provide that motivation by being a good bit tougher on them. They sometimes try this, but then go soft on them again after not very long.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#137Earlier quoted context omitted.
What does effort mean in this context? I recall friends of mine, young women, who were having the hardest time finding a significant other were just demanding things of men that would have them selecting from a socioeconomic pool of the top 20% of the population, when they themselves were in the bottom 20%. It was my experience that young women in general were asking for too much when I was in my early 20s. They want…
> What does effort mean in this context? One school of thought says there are men on dating websites who copy-paste a message saying "hey how you doing?" to every woman they see; and that women are beset by hundreds of copy-pasted messages from men who haven't even read their profile. This school of thought says, in order to stand out, men should carefully compose a different clever, charming message for each woman t…
Putting too much effort into those messages is a trap I fell into in the past when looking for relationships on dating apps. You've seen a few pics and read a couple sentences of text they typed - you shouldn't read too much into it for your own sake, and you also don't want to look like you're too eager to jump into something way too fast.
(Looking for hookups on apps is, I imagine, an entirely different ballgame, and I have no idea what works or doesn't work there.)
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#138Earlier quoted context omitted.
I wonder what kind of situation your friend had going on in their house or their lives. Maybe y'all aren't as similar as you think?
Sure. Maybe. His parents were both doctors and he had four siblings and an adopted sibling that all see to have done fine. But There certainly could be something I'm missing.
That parents did not had time and energy to notice and fix the problem. With 6 kids, it is quite difficult even in best conditions.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#139Earlier quoted context omitted.
I have an idea I've been toying with for a dating tool (I refuse to call it an app) based on the premise that all dating "apps" and "sites" are horrible because their incentives are aligned toward wanting people to actually use them. You pretty much have ad-driven and subscription models and both have perverse incentives. Further, the whole "wink", "like" and "swipe" nonsense increases the "meat market" commoditizati…
And I will make X profiles from X emails, filling out the questionnaire in several ways to maximize the number of hits I get. The profile will be some good ol PT Barnum style pablum that appeals to just about all of us. I will also add pictures that are either extremely flattering of me, or of someone else. It doesn't really matter. Then I just agree to every date that gets sent to my email. Ideally this could be aut…
This is an excellent way to have a LOT of just bad, bad dates. Good luck! I hope you change, for your sake, and for the sake of the people you'll drag through dates.
Re: Fewer young men are in the labor force, more are living at home
#140I'm in the labor force, but live at home. I can absolutely afford to purchase a home. Why don't I? Because I'm not spending $250,000+ on 1400sq ft. These types of articles make it seem like some huge mystery as to why society is the way it is today. It's no mystery. Houses cost to much and employers don't pay enough.
Not sure where you live, but 800 sqft condos are going for like $800K here in Toronto.
SFH under 2000 sqft are going for well $1.5M.
Inventory is near all time lows.