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Poor in Tech

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Re: Poor in Tech

#611

Post by redisman »

2cb wrote: post #558

Some of this is poor people stuff but some of it strikes me more as depression/low self-esteem. Of course one can lead to the other and that may be the case for the author, but it’s not only poor people who feel depressed or suffer with low self-esteem so some of it seemed out of place. Obviously examples like the guy who didn’t notice his paycheque bouncing are a sign people around you are wealthy though.

> Obviously examples like the guy who didn’t notice his paycheque bouncing are a sign people around you are wealthy though.

That means you’re wealthy now. I grew up fairly poor but with 10+ years in the industry I probably wouldn’t notice a missing paycheck for a while. I’m making 5-10x more than as a teenager. Doesn’t mean I grew up as some kind of an aristocrat

Re: Poor in Tech

#612

Post by Haruiko »

kyawzazaw wrote: post #470
Haruiko wrote: post #415

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not following your argument. You share the same space. How distant are you with other people that you can't just say hi? Does it matter if you don't discuss politics after it? When i was a kid, i had to take the bus and i forgot my bus ticket (a pupil, on one bus stop, everyday, the same bus stop the same bus driver on a school route...) and he put a lot of energy into telling me off. A few days/weeks later i tho…

I say hi only and came from a fairly well-off family. Every additional complaints about my life or happenings in my life that I would have would be unrelatable to the maids and the drivers at our house and it might make them feel uncomfortable.

And have you thought about finding out who your maids and drivers are? Talking to them about their lives?

No interest in learning who they are? What they like? When they have birthday?

If you have a bad day, for whatever reason, you think they couldn't relate to having a bad day?

Re: Poor in Tech

#613

Post by 6gvONxR4sf7o »

isomorph wrote: post #116

Many of the comments on this article are so cold. I can’t believe it. When I read the original article I was imagining all the constructive ways HN readers would interpret it and hold a mirror up to their own behaviour. Some commenters are doing this. But it surprises and depresses me how many people are commenting saying “no, this list isn’t what it says it is, it’s a list showing the author has a negative mindset /…

Personally, I'm reacting negatively because it feels like she says she does all these things that I do, and that nearly everyone in nearly every office I've worked in does. And she uses it to draw a contrast between herself and us. So to me all but a couple items read as "I knew I was different because I do this thing that nearly everyone does."

Maybe I'm in a weird lucky tech bubble where I've gotten to have a whole career that's mostly devoid of the people she's drawing a contrast against, but I've worked at a pretty disparate variety of jobs, and my experience seems to ring true with a lot of other commenters too.

Maybe I'm just having a kneejerk reaction because the last articles I read this morning were "silicon valley and californians are bad/clueless," and I'm reading that into this when it's not intended subtext.

Re: Poor in Tech

#614

Post by burntoutfire »

Tade0 wrote: post #505
stavros wrote: post #425

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What did poverty look like for you? I am also from somewhere very different from this, though I can't say I grew up poor, we did okay.

For me it was mostly not being able to afford school books and clothes, shoes other than Chinese supermarket stuff - so something that wouldn't last two seasons. Also five people living in a 45m2 apartment - thankfully only until I was twelve or so. We reached a low point as a family when I was in college and my father, who left a few years earlier, stopped supporting us. Fortunately by that time I had a part-time jo…

A family member has told me a story of her poor childhood in the thirties in rural Poland. During springs, their family had to steal rotten potatoes from other people's fields and eat weeds to survive. THAT's being poor. What the original article describes sounds more like a anxiety over a risk of falling into poverty, than actual poverty.

Re: Poor in Tech

#615

Post by 2cb »

lhorie wrote: post #570
isomorph wrote: post #116

Many of the comments on this article are so cold. I can’t believe it. When I read the original article I was imagining all the constructive ways HN readers would interpret it and hold a mirror up to their own behaviour. Some commenters are doing this. But it surprises and depresses me how many people are commenting saying “no, this list isn’t what it says it is, it’s a list showing the author has a negative mindset /…

> Many of the comments on this article are so cold. I mean, the tone of the article is pretty much "me vs them", so is really any surprise that some people would take offense? The anecdotes range anywhere from caricatures (hot cheetos) to gaffes (cheering over a bonus cheque). What you're implying is that one ought to be empathetic about the OP's struggles w/ "rich person etiquette". But that in itself is a bit tone…

This has been my experience too. My mum grew up poor but you’d never guess it now. Knows all about etiquette and wears fancy designer clothing etc.

I’m sure it’s true many do have trouble adjusting after growing up poor but it’s hardly as universal as some here are making out.

Re: Poor in Tech

#616

Post by novok »

est31 wrote: post #10

> I knew I was the only poor person at my tech startup because I was the only person who would say hello to the cleaning lady as she meekly made her rounds around us when we worked late. Everyone else had a long habit of ignoring anyone like her. That's IMO the worst behaviour of the rich listed in this article. I've heard stories that at Google, the non-engineering workers at campus may not socialize with engineers…

To be fair, large tech companies have a lot of people, most people don't talk to most people in tech companies, even if they are the same 'position'. Much like you don't talk to most random students as you walk around at large university as a student at the university. You talk to your classmates and professors and if circumstance permits, you talk to random stranger students sometimes.

Re: Poor in Tech

#617

Post by burnte »

isomorph wrote: post #116

Many of the comments on this article are so cold. I can’t believe it. When I read the original article I was imagining all the constructive ways HN readers would interpret it and hold a mirror up to their own behaviour. Some commenters are doing this. But it surprises and depresses me how many people are commenting saying “no, this list isn’t what it says it is, it’s a list showing the author has a negative mindset /…

As someone who was very por growing up and worked their ass off to become who I am today, everything she said is 100% true of being poor and not an artifact of a bad attitude. If anything, the fact she sees the opportunities for free lunches and tampons shows she's actaulyl got a GOOD attitude and is resourceful. All of those things are indicative of an observant, hard worker.

Re: Poor in Tech

#618

Post by ludamad »

brundolf wrote: post #598
ludamad wrote: post #249

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Being HN, people love to debate, and god forbid you give an in for moral high-grounding. My student loans were crushing at one point. Now I require my friends and family to remind me the weight of a 'few thousands'. I feel drawn towards a bubble where I can do opulent activities without guilt. I've heard people say to me "yeah, eventually you just cut off those friends still working at McDonald's". I've never agreed…

> but I've felt the gradual drift I'm not sure why there would even be a gradual drift? My friends who aren't in tech are generally my most fun and interesting friends. We play D&D, we have dinner or drinks at each other's houses, we talk about anime and music and video games, we play with each other's dogs. The only version of this I have experienced is the one where my non-tech friends are being forced out of my ci…

Do you own a house in that city? If so, you would suddenly have a ton of house ownership problems your friends can't relate to. It is those sorts of things I am referring to

I can't help that one of my most active chats right now is speculative investing, and it simply is not a game for e.g. people with high rate debt

Then what about making someone feel shitty for describing your day? That you took a day off due to stress, and you remind them of their unchecked mental health crisis? I'm not saying you can't be a good friend through this, but that you need to be a good friend through this. This makes it much more doable with long-time friends rather than new people who you subconsciously pick as being like you

Re: Poor in Tech

#619

Post by hackerrrnews »

6gvONxR4sf7o wrote: post #613
isomorph wrote: post #116

Many of the comments on this article are so cold. I can’t believe it. When I read the original article I was imagining all the constructive ways HN readers would interpret it and hold a mirror up to their own behaviour. Some commenters are doing this. But it surprises and depresses me how many people are commenting saying “no, this list isn’t what it says it is, it’s a list showing the author has a negative mindset /…

Personally, I'm reacting negatively because it feels like she says she does all these things that I do, and that nearly everyone in nearly every office I've worked in does. And she uses it to draw a contrast between herself and us. So to me all but a couple items read as "I knew I was different because I do this thing that nearly everyone does." Maybe I'm in a weird lucky tech bubble where I've gotten to have a whole…

So maybe you're rich then?

Re: Poor in Tech

#620

Post by 6gvONxR4sf7o »

sidlls wrote: post #345
colinmhayes wrote: post #320

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I grew up upper middle class and do the same thing. I know generationally wealthy people that do too.

But you didn't and don't have to just to survive, and neither do those with generational wealth. The context certainly matters.

I thought your point was the psychology: you don't have to anymore but you still do.
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