> Unfortunately, disabling uPnP these days is too much of a hit to convenience, so I looked for other solutions. Don't do this, there is no good reason to run UPNP if you care about security, turn it off and learn to manage a firewall. If the author really cares, go one step further and replace the ISP owned router with something with more control. Finally, if one cares about the software one's NAS runs, build or buy…
Do you have a router you recommend? Ideally something running free software
Don't waste time with WiFi on the gateway itself as most WiFI chips you can buy are crippled in firmware for regulatory reasons. Just use a dedicated commercial AP hooked up directly or VLANed.
Once you get comfortable with something like pfSense I highly recommend switching to regular Free/OpenBSD, or Linux depending on what you're comfortable with. I find it much easier to manage a gateway with the entire configuration in version control than a GUI. There aren't that many services that a gateway needs to run.
If you feel like you'll miss pf on the *BSDs check out nftables on Linux. It's not as well documented but it's much less painful than iptables.
To loop this into the UPnP discussion: when you build your own gateway from scratch you have to add a UPnP daemon and configure it yourself, instead of forgetting to disable it and exposing poorly configured IOT stuff.