> So maybe the girls are ageist and should be trained out of it
I'm not convinced that having a preference for romantic partners reasonably close to your own age is ageist any more than my own preference for brunettes over blondes makes me blondist, or my preference for women over men makes me homophobic, or somebody else's preference for same-sex partners makes them heterophobic.
We all have preferences. Some of those are based on very rational reasoning: e.g., I want to reduce the likelihood that my partner will die decades before me simply because they're much, much older than me (though of course there are no guarantees); or, I'd still like to have children so I'm not yet interested in dating post-menopausal women. Some preferences are much more emotional or physical: does this person make me hard/wet?
I'm not demanding "unattractive men" remove themselves from the dating pool. I'm suggesting that perhaps they might want to take the other person's feelings and preferences into account before foisting themselves upon them.
When I was 36 a 23 year old threw herself at me, when I was 39 a 22 year old was interested in me (I was, of course, flattered but gently demurred because I wasn't attracted to her). When it was still possible to go to nightclubs (and not that I went that often) most times I'd get my arse groped by one or more women when I was at the bar or on the dancefloor. Mostly younger, often much younger; mostly attractive. Mostly it was flattering, occasionally irritating.
This is not a flex[0], and I don't consider myself to be a particularly attractive man - especially not with 12 months of COVID flab on me - but I am acutely aware that some women at least do find older men attractive. The difference, you'll notice, is that they initiated, and the reasons I'm mostly OK with it and not creeped out even when I'm not interested is that they represent zero threat to me, they can mostly take the hint, and there's no power asymmetry in their favour.
Well, that and the fact that it's an enormous ego stroke.
That's not the way many women feel most of the time when they get unwanted attention from guys: they clearly do see us as a threat.
[0] To balance any perception that this might be a flex: I probably show romantic interest in individual women a handful of times per year and tend to go for those who are closer to my own age - at the very least into their 30s (does this make me ageist?) - and I've been turned down by plenty of them (hence still looking). I'd probably pursue more women but the reality is that once you're out of your 20s, and particularly once you're into your late 30s, the pool of available women who are close to your own age shrinks A LOT. Like REALLY a lot. Find someone when you're younger if you possibly can.