"Please don't just say hello in chat": order of words is everything. I have never said "just hello" in chat.
Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
121–130 of 362 posts
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#122Earlier quoted context omitted.
For me, it can also be a privacy thing. Sometimes I want to validate that my chat is not going to got onto a presenters screen somewhere.
The fact that the following messages shouldn't be shown publicly is useful information to convey, and I feel like conveying that avoids wasting the first message -- If it explicitly says that what follows needs to be private. (The recipient needs more than "hi" to know that what follows is private)
Not necessarily. The context of the presentation and/or the sender could be enough to determine that.
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#123Depends on the people involved.
Some are likely to be sharing screen in a presentation at any given time, then it is the expected way of starting a chat.
Others would be unlikely to be in meetings often, then it is plain unnecessary (and even pretentious).
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#124Earlier quoted context omitted.
> Wanting a synchronous conversation is a pretty arrogant grab of someone else's time. This is an assumption, and not always a valid one. There are plenty of circumstances where synchronous comms are warranted, such as when matters are urgent for all parties or when the respondent has a reputation for losing track of async comms. Editing to add: I agree that "hey" and "hi" etc. are terrible openings. However, opening…
Those are good reasons for phoning, yes, but even then you'd be better if you're stuck in text to start off with as much urgent information as possible. "Hi Bob, the wobbulator sprocket is on fire and I need to you defusticate the gonksnaffler immediately."
Unless the matter has an ephemerality requirement, in which case I message seeking immediate availability and then transition to a phone call.
A signal call if the matter needs to be both ephemeral and confidential.
Insisting on asynchronous communication for All The Things™ concerns me in that it shows that a person isn't adaptable to varying criticalities and sensitivities. The same goes for insisting on synchronous communication.
TL;DR they both have their place, and they will always both have their place regardless of any one person's preference.
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#125Prior to extended remote work, I used to feel this way when people just sent a single hello. But now I use it as an invitation to make small talk. So if someone just says hello, I start asking them questions: how's it going, how's is , etc. This makes some people go straight to their original question, but I think it also helps both of us feel a little more connected while everyone is remote.
Interesting! I and several on my team feel the opposite. This extended remote work has been a breathe of fresh air - no longer so burdened by unnecessary social conventions like small talk, except at predetermined times such as "virtual happy hour".
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#126What's HN take on short messages vs long messages in slack/signal/whatsapp ? I was recently asked to make longer messages rather than short sentences when exposing ideas in the flow of the conversation (I think the manager was annoyed by incessant notifications on his phone but he could either keep the screen on or turn them off instead of telling me I could use shift-enter :D).
I don't intend to change my style though, chat isn't email.
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#127Since we’re all bitching about communication annoyances, let me ask this:
Which is worse?
- Naked ‘Hello’/‘Are you there’ messages?
Or
- Having your “DND/In a meeting/On Vacation” status indicator completely ignored by “Are you there?” Messages?
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#128>People who do this are generally trying to be polite by not jumping right into the request, like one would in person or on the phone - and that's great! Different people have different reasons but I notice that many people that do a naked "hi" / "hey" are trying to see if the receiver is present for an immediate reply. In other words, the sender deliberately wants a synchronous instead of asynchronous convo. They do…
don't want to answer the phone
That's me too, but conversely WFH over the last 10 months with zoom has made me more amenable to having meetings. Because when there is a need to talk synced, we can do it and have just a 15 minute meeting and that's all.
IRL, it seems like people are reluctant to schedule any block shorter than half an hour and typically go 10-15 minutes longer than scheduled, combined with working in a large area where I might have to walk 10 minutes back and forth to the meeting location.
Rarely would any meeting eat less than 1.5 hours of my time. Now, it can sing be 15 minutes.
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#129>People who do this are generally trying to be polite by not jumping right into the request, like one would in person or on the phone - and that's great! Different people have different reasons but I notice that many people that do a naked "hi" / "hey" are trying to see if the receiver is present for an immediate reply. In other words, the sender deliberately wants a synchronous instead of asynchronous convo. They do…
I don't care, but FWIW, I often don't reply anything at all until the messenger doesn't elaborate on his greetings, even if I'm present and could answer otherwise. I mean, if he doesn't, he probably didn't need it that much anyway...
Re: Please don't say just hello in chat (2013)
#130I hate this so much. It seems to be a culture thing too where people in our Asia offices always do it. I'm sure I seem really rude to them when I ignore, or suddenly ask questions without doing the "hi" handshake.
Asian here. Yeah, it feels a little rude to start asking questions without first going through the equivalent of a SYN+ACK handshake.
I usually compromise by sending two messages in quick succession. I write the actual question first, Ctrl+X it, send a "hi" first, Ctrl+V the question back into the textarea, and send it immediately afterward so that I don't waste the recipient's time.