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Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

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Re: Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

#32
If programming seems hard, it might be because you need to learn a separate discipline depending on the order of magnitude of your codebase LOC:

10⁰: Axiomatics

10¹: Logic

10²: Mathematics

10³: Computer Science

10⁴: Software Engineering

10⁵: Group Psychology

10⁶: Politics

10⁷: Crisis Management

Re: Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

#34
post #28

A QA engineer walks into a bar and orders a beer. She orders 2 beers. She orders 0 beers. She orders -1 beers. She orders a lizard. She orders a NULLPTR. She tries to leave without paying. Satisfied, she declares the bar ready for business. The first customer comes in an orders a beer. They finish their drink, and then ask where the bathroom is. The bar explodes.

[deleted]

Re: Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

#39
Not exactly programming per-se, but cute:

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a software engineer from Microsoft are in a car together, driving to a conference. They start down a hill when the brakes give out and they crash into a tree at the bottom of the hill. Luckily no one is seriously injured, and they set out to figure out what happened. The mechanical engineer examines the car and says "I believe a brake line was over-pressured and burst, causing the crash." The electrical engineer looks and say "No, I think it was a short-circuit in the anti-lock braking system." The Microsoft guy stays quiet, so the other two look at him and ask "What do you think happened?" He looks up and say "I don't know, but let's push the car back to the top of the hill and try again."

---

A newly wed software engineer from Microsoft and his wife are going to visit her family in the mountains. For some reason they have to travel separately and she arrives before him. After a while the phone rings and the new wife's dad answers. It's the husband. He says "Tell everybody I'll be there in 5 minutes." 35 minutes pass and the phone rings again. The husband says "Tell everybody I'll be there in 2 hours." A minute later he calls again and says "Tell everybody I'll be there in 14 minutes." 45 minutes later the phone rings again and the dad answers and says "You're the guy who designed the Windows progress bar dialog aren't you?"

Re: Ask HN: Anyone know any funny programming jokes?

#40
post #3

There are only two problems in programming... Naming things, cache eviction, and off by one errors

There are only two hard problems in computer science:

0) Cache invalidation 1) Naming things 5) Asynchronous callbacks 2) Off-by-one errors 3) Scope creep 6) Bounds checking

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