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The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

wired.com

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Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#171

Post by JeremyNT »

I would like to mention that Mostly Harmless's identity and history were first reported by Jason Nark of Adventure Journal way back in December (and discussed on HN [0] at that time). His piece [1] is now fully updated to include the original article as well as the updates.

Nark isn't credited in this particular Wired article (although he was credited in Thomson's first article for Wired [2]). This is the despite the fact that Nark, as far as I can tell, wrote the first mainstream article about Mostly Harmless and also was the first reporter to determine his identity.

I suppose Nicholas Thomson must have researched it independently for this new wired piece, explaining why it's being released so much later and with no mention of the reporter who "broke" the story.

[0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=25526104

[1] https://www.adventure-journal.com/2020/12/the-mystery-of-dec...

[2] https://www.wired.com/story/nameless-hiker-mostly-harmless-i...

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#172

Post by LatteLazy »

elliekelly wrote: post #20
LatteLazy wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

But he told obscure jokes! But yeah, I think the title is clickbait, nothing here actually seems unsettling.

> On a Saturday night in September 2016, K was injured when a terrorist set off a bomb on West 23rd Street in Manhattan. “I had pretty bad PTSD to which he hated caring for me, even kept a dated log of every time I needed help, to the point where he left me outside in the dark—knowing that at that time I couldn't be outside alone or be in the dark without panicking,” she recalls, before adding, “and this is only the…

Maybe I've become jaded living in a low socioeconomic area but this sounds like the people living 2 doors down from me. They're forever having screaming matches, both diagnosed with mental health issues, they rarely work. But they're not that unusual here at the bottom end of the income distribution.

I was a little to flippant in my comment, maybe I should be more unsettled?

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#173

Post by freetime2 »

Whenever I read a biography about some person I admire, I always end up disliking that person. Failed relationships and abandoned responsibilities are exceedingly common (especially among artists and people who are highly driven to success). I think that most of us have some “unsettling” details in our past. People are imperfect.

The allegations of physical and mental abuse here are particularly bad, and I’m not trying to make any excuses for Rodriguez. But they aren’t exactly uncommon in this world, either.

The tone of this article feels a little too judgmental to me. Like Rodriguez somehow had an obligation to all the people who were interested in his story, and has let them down. But is it really surprising that someone who died in such unusual conditions, with no friends or family to report him as missing, would have had a rough past?

The author also says at one point “maybe that’s the prettiest bow you can put on the box that contains this strange story”. But why should we as interested observers feel the need or be entitled to “put a bow” on this other man’s life?

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#174

Post by rel-throwaway »

demadog wrote: post #154
rel-throwaway wrote: post #146

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I struggle with this in my personal life. To most friends and acquaintances I can be friendly, personable, interesting, and engaging when we meet. But at home, with close family, and especially with my wife I struggle to be that person. My default state is that I mostly want to be left alone. All the people closest to me seem to want something -- time, attention, help, emotional support etc. none of which I seem to n…

Just a thought, but what if you set a daily time limit of being fully engaged and present with your wife, say for an hour or two, but then it is understood that you need ~3 hrs of alone time. Sounds like you’re an introvert and need time to recharge from managing a team and you’re burnt out from that. I think she’d be delighted with an hour a day of full presence, perhaps more on the weekend.

This is a good suggestion and something I am going to attempt to negotiate. I think part of the problem is something a person called out below -- we are fundamentally different. She does not need the same amount of time alone and may resent me for wanting that. But something to try.

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#175

Post by jgilias »

holtalanm wrote: post #130
jgilias wrote: post #64

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I believe it's called a mask. People with some personality disorders gradually develop a sort of behavioral mask to wear in public in order to fit in into the wider society and be able to achieve one's goals. However, having it 'on' is apparently taxing, so it comes off around people who are in one way or another part of some inner circle for whom there's no point to pretend.

> However, having it 'on' is apparently taxing That just sounds like standard introvert, though. The hiker in the article, on the other hand, seems to be off-the-deep-end introvert.

It's... Not even close. What I had in mind was what clinical narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths do. Their brains are wired completely differently than what is regarded as normal, to the point where you can see that on CT scans. There was a story about a researcher who figured out he's a high-functioning psychopath by looking at his CT scans. I'm digressing. So, typically, starting from a very early age they'd learn the behaviors they need to do in order to not get into trouble. Down to 'make an upward arch with your mouth when you see someone who knows you'. Must be very hard to live like that, I don't think it's comparable to what introverts do. Because introverts simply amplify behaviors that they do have, or understand, or are at least able to relate to from parts of personal experience. Contrast that to literally coming up with an artificial persona that you can't even relate to in any way and having to always stick to that.

This is why the masks ar pretty much always super charming and likeable. If you're acting anyway, might as well act like someone that's super likeable. Pretty much how you max out a player in some game.

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#176

Post by trianglem »

throwaway6299 wrote: post #153
rel-throwaway wrote: post #146

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I struggle with this in my personal life. To most friends and acquaintances I can be friendly, personable, interesting, and engaging when we meet. But at home, with close family, and especially with my wife I struggle to be that person. My default state is that I mostly want to be left alone. All the people closest to me seem to want something -- time, attention, help, emotional support etc. none of which I seem to n…

How strange, just created an account to say that I am the same way and was thinking about this a lot last night. (Although, I don’t think I am emotionally abusive, as I feel my spouse demands things that are entirely unreasonable, like frequently asking me to leave work in the middle of the day to come help with something or buying a house and dog when we had less than $1,000 in our account). All I wanted my whole li…

I’m going to get downvoted for this but here goes. For a marriage to be successful, one partner has to be dominant. A marriage of equals doesn’t work and your parents (and mine) have happy relationships because this principle was followed. I converted to Islam around 8 years ago and married a Muslim woman and I could not be more happy. For the last 6 years, everyday is bliss and I’ve never performed better at work.

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#177

Post by UI_at_80x24 »

agloeregrets wrote: post #159
UI_at_80x24 wrote: post #98

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> People who decide to commit suicide sometimes appear to others to be feeling a lot better in the time between the decision and the final act. To misquote a line from a favorite TV show; "Fear accompanies the possibility of death. Calm shepherds its certainty." -Ka D'Argo, Farscape I have attempted suicide, and that line fits for me. As another reader has pointed out there is also peace that comes from making a choi…

Having been on that edge and (luckily) not having the guts, I found that the moment when you can't give yourself the certainty to just do it is somehow even darker than contemplating it. I hope you have that certainty in hope for a better future with you in it and that things are better for you now.

>not having the guts

This is the point that nobody understands. It's HARD to do! The easy thing to do is let the momentum of living bring you to the next day. It's very difficult to over-ride instinct and cause life-threatening injury to oneself.

So I laugh when I hear "it takes more courage to live", or "they took the cowards way out".

Thank-you for your gentle words. To once again misquote (from a movie): "I'm not dead yet."

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#178

Post by UI_at_80x24 »

helmholtz wrote: post #150
UI_at_80x24 wrote: post #98

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> People who decide to commit suicide sometimes appear to others to be feeling a lot better in the time between the decision and the final act. To misquote a line from a favorite TV show; "Fear accompanies the possibility of death. Calm shepherds its certainty." -Ka D'Argo, Farscape I have attempted suicide, and that line fits for me. As another reader has pointed out there is also peace that comes from making a choi…

Christ, I can't imagine what it feels like to be in a place where the only choice one sees is out. Hope you're feeling better.

Thank-you.

I am. I'm not.

Major Depressive Disorder is a bitch with a long memory.

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#179

Post by xsmasher »

stuckindider wrote: post #134
deeeeplearning wrote: post #102

This stuff is disturbing. These articles read like hit pieces. The guy can't even defend himself and you have all these wild claims from supposed ex-girlfriends. It's just bizarre. Let the guy lie in peace.

It's honestly disgusting how people have made it into a game of trying to figure out who he was. Cutting him open for bone fragments. He died alone in the woods. Was there any reason to think it was caused by malace? No. Then fuck off and let him be.

There may have been family waiting for word of him. No one knew at the time.

Re: The unsettling truth about the ‘Mostly Harmless’ hiker

#180

Post by adrianmonk »

ksdale wrote: post #131
tppiotrowski wrote: post #37

The article talks about his ability to be friendly to strangers but abusive to his long term acquaintances. I have observed this pattern and curious if anyone knows what drives this? My personal theory is that you have some sort of obligations to long term acquaintances but you owe nothing to strangers on the trail. It's this feeling of obligation that leads you to resent people over time.

I think there may be an element of survivorship bias at play. There's kind of a 2x2 you can draw where people can be publicly/privately kind/abusive. People who are kind all the time (or at least, not abusive all the time) are unremarkable, I'm not sure there are many people who are publicly abusive and privately kind, and people who are both publicly and privately abusive are way more likely to end up in prison, or…

There could also be a survivorship bias of relationships. The friends you still have are the ones who are willing and able to put up with your shit. The others are no longer in your life.

So when you're around them, you know you can let out your bad side to some extent. You don't know that with random strangers.

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