Deleting Facebook permanently • Hacker News Board

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#161

Post by mgh2 » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:20 PM UTC

Traubenfuchs wrote: post #16

I am 28 and none of my peers is using FB anymore. I have some older friends that do their yearly christmas party invite on FB and some people who chat with me on FB messenger. There primarily are ads, spam, people posting commercial content and people congratulating each other for their birthdays. Is facebook this dead for anyone else?

From a social (ironic) impact perspective:

My first wake up call came from Trump winning the 2016 election, 2nd from Cambridge Analytica. 3rd, The Social Dilemma put the nail in the coffin.

I just could not see myself contributing directly or indirectly to these externalities. The costs outweighed the benefits (if any at all)

PS: I know this post might be marketing for you, but ultimately all social networks will become polluted as long as they encourage the weaknesses/dark sides of human nature. I don’t see Spacehey being any different.

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#162

Post by pmarreck » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:22 PM UTC

tootie wrote: post #141

tschellenbach wrote: post #9

People tend to just blindly follow what the news reports to the extent that this is now very relevant for Facebook: http://www.paulgraham.com/say.html

Ha, I love it. I have two opinions that fall into that category. One is that people shouldn't own pets. Least of all sapient creatures like dogs. I'd wager that will become a common point of view a century or two after I'm gone. The other one (relevant to this thread) is that Facebook is a great product and people only hate it now because it's a such a horrendously efficient mirror of the ugliness of humanity.

> One is that people shouldn't own pets. Least of all sapient creatures like dogs. I'd wager that will become a common point of view a century or two after I'm gone.

Considering that cats 1) have been human companions since the ancient Egyptian days, when the penalty of killing a cat was death, 2) ONLY became human companions of their own volition after their utility in eradicating mice and rats was recognized (note that until a few decades ago, pets were kept outdoors most of the time)... I really, REALLY doubt this prediction tremendously LOL.

Also, you have entirely obviously never had a cat. (I've had both dogs and cats. Cats are more interesting. Dogs are like permanent 3 year old boys.)

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#163

Post by xeromal » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:24 PM UTC

I deleted fb years ago but came back partially in order to keep up with my family. It's where everyone talks for better or worse and I'd rather keep in touch with my siblings and cousins than make a point. It bums me out but my relationships have improved a ton since I'm in all the group chats.

To manage the best I can, I purely use messenger.com and stay out of facebook.com. I keep in touch but I don't get caught up in the rest of the BS.

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#164

Post by UI_at_80x24 » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:24 PM UTC

Am I the only one who only used/uses IRC? Back in '92 I started using IRC as my primary "group chat/social platform", and ICQ for IM's among closer friends. I stayed on IRC for a very long time, and grew-older with the same circle. It was nice. It was personal. I know people in that group that got married.

Time passed, people moved on; had families, etc. I've tried a few other platforms like facebook, but they all seemed so fake, shallow, and "designed for AOL'ers" that was a recipe for crap. So I never stuck around.

G+ arrived and had the right feel, but it never grew legs.

Facebook has two things going for it. (1) it's an echo chamber (2) the "OMG I can communicate with somebody over the internet" dopamine spike

Well I got #2 too, but I was 12 years old on a C64 connecting to BBS's. So I out-grew it. Why can't all these people outgrow this?

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#165

Post by pmarreck » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:25 PM UTC

7thaccount wrote: post #19

I deleted mine several years ago, but was only using it once every few months for a few years before that. There wasn't anything there of value anymore for me. If I want to check up on someone, I call/text and have even been drug into a snapchat group.

Many times you want to connect to someone but don't know anything but their name and who they're friends with. For example, my dad (who is 75 and whose wife died this past year) is engaging with many people on FB now, and it seems good for him

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#166

Post by ignoramous » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:26 PM UTC

rocgf wrote: post #93

Traubenfuchs wrote: post #16

I am 28 and none of my peers is using FB anymore. I have some older friends that do their yearly christmas party invite on FB and some people who chat with me on FB messenger. There primarily are ads, spam, people posting commercial content and people congratulating each other for their birthdays. Is facebook this dead for anyone else?

I quit it about a year ago and I cannot even remember what it was like having an account, it just seems so strange that this would be such an important part of their online life. Everybody I know is on Whatsapp/Signal, so I really don't feel like I'm missing anything.

> Everybody I know is on Whatsapp/Signal...

Same, and in addition, everyone I know has since moved to Instagram. I think what Google+ wanted to do with "circles", Twitter and Instagram did it more elegantly with "follows".

Reading between the lines of this presentation at f8 [0], I think, even Zuck's resigned to the fact that Facebook the company is now all about WhatsApp and Instagram.

The more I think about the WhatsApp deal, the less it makes sense for Jan and Brian to have cashed out. It could have been a different world had they not.

[0] https://youtu.be/U8SXVlfh5k0

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#167

Post by w1nk » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:28 PM UTC

xeromal wrote: post #163

I deleted fb years ago but came back partially in order to keep up with my family. It's where everyone talks for better or worse and I'd rather keep in touch with my siblings and cousins than make a point. It bums me out but my relationships have improved a ton since I'm in all the group chats. To manage the best I can, I purely use messenger.com and stay out of facebook.com. I keep in touch but I don't get caught up…

It's more than just making a point though. It's having a principled belief in something and standing by it. That's fine if you don't feel that way, but there are lots of us that feel very negatively towards facebook and its impact on society.

It's not about making a point, it's about not actively being part of the thing I see as a problem.

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#168

Post by dsr_ » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:29 PM UTC

react_burger38 wrote: post #136

Traubenfuchs wrote: post #16

I am 28 and none of my peers is using FB anymore. I have some older friends that do their yearly christmas party invite on FB and some people who chat with me on FB messenger. There primarily are ads, spam, people posting commercial content and people congratulating each other for their birthdays. Is facebook this dead for anyone else?

Deleted FB, Insta and Snap a little over four years ago... It was revealing how many friends I actually had compared to how many I thought I had. Surprising as well how much I don't miss it.

Social networks love to throw around the term "friend" as though all the kinds of relationships it denotes are the same. Clearly, it isn't.

There are people I know from mailing lists and newsgroups and fora who are my acquaintances, even though we've never met in meatspace. I have cried over their deaths and been happy at news of their joys.

There are people I remember from tens of years and thousands of miles away, whom I hear from more regularly because of social media networks. That's nice. It's low effort for me, it's low effort for them, and we all get more out of it than we put in.

If what you mean by the word "friend" is, someone who will answer your call in the middle of the night and bring over a shovel and a tarp -- I have only a few of those. Those relationships take more work, and are not fully sustained by social media, though they may be partially supported by it.

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#169

Post by sli » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:30 PM UTC

react_burger38 wrote: post #136

Traubenfuchs wrote: post #16

I am 28 and none of my peers is using FB anymore. I have some older friends that do their yearly christmas party invite on FB and some people who chat with me on FB messenger. There primarily are ads, spam, people posting commercial content and people congratulating each other for their birthdays. Is facebook this dead for anyone else?

Deleted FB, Insta and Snap a little over four years ago... It was revealing how many friends I actually had compared to how many I thought I had. Surprising as well how much I don't miss it.

Deleted FB long ago enough now that I can't remember when exactly it was, but what I do remember is exactly zero of the people who I talked to primarily on Facebook contacted me any other way despite asking for contact details.

Not only do I not miss it, I'm actively hostile towards Facebook for the damage it does to the idea of friendship.

Re: Deleting Facebook permanently

#170

Post by sumtechguy » Wed, Jan 06, 2021, 6:32 PM UTC

random5634 wrote: post #77

Traubenfuchs wrote: post #16

I am 28 and none of my peers is using FB anymore. I have some older friends that do their yearly christmas party invite on FB and some people who chat with me on FB messenger. There primarily are ads, spam, people posting commercial content and people congratulating each other for their birthdays. Is facebook this dead for anyone else?

I've been very inactive, in the older age range. That's a big shift. It was driven by the move to just constant clickbait controversy / political shares in news feed and other factors. Way back in feb I made a post suggesting masks might be a low cost / useful way to reduce spread of covid, that was attacked by everyone as not recommended and that they don't work, and so I just gave up on facebook at that point.

I still have the account. But have not logged in in months. There is one or two people who that is the only way I can contact them at all. I have been backing away from it for about 3-4 years now. My wife blew away her account 5-6 years ago. It was mostly a nice way to reminisce about old friendships, at first. But then you quickly remembered why they are no longer current friends.

I figured out that Facebook itself is not awful. It may be in many ways, but it is my 'friends' who drove me away. When I was around them they seemed semi normal. But put them behind a keyboard and the truth came out of what they were and how they really thought about me and my beliefs. Their inner keyboard warrior came out. They were not real friends but 'friends' of proximity. I had confused friendly with friends.