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I am lonely will anyone speak to me

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Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#21

Post by tonymet »

hiddencost wrote: post #13
tonymet wrote: post #7

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Does this number actually help? It’s shared kind of automatically but I find it trivializes suicide

I've volunteered fairly regularly on one of the member hotlines, and have personally attempted suicide. Out of 1000 calls I had one person attempt, maybe 10 people decide not to attempt, and the rest were just people who were anxious or sad or scared and were having thoughts. There's a very broad spectrum, and for someone who is hopeless or just lonely and sad, talking to a caring human who listens and is comfortable…

This is helpful I was dubious . Good on you and thanks for your service

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#23

Post by ineedasername »

tonymet wrote: post #7
dhaivat wrote: post #4

It goes without saying that this year has been really difficult for most if not all of us. Not being able to see extended family especially during holiday season can feel lonely and depressing. Please, please, please don't make this a solo suffering, use FaceTime, Xoom, WhatsApp, Meet whatever to talk to friends/family if you can. If things feel worse - don't keep it to yourself, for those in the US - 1-800-273-8255'…

Does this number actually help? It’s shared kind of automatically but I find it trivializes suicide

If it trivializes suicide, that just means more people might call. But the same core of people that try need help will still be among them. Out of the countless people in distress that might attempt or succeed in suicide, there is a subset that are on that edge where they're looking for that last bit of help, wanting to try a last hope before taking an irrevocable step.

To be sure, by itself it is not nearly as effective as more personal and substantial interventions, but that is not it's purpose either. It is not there for treatment, it's there to help stabilize an emotional state enough to convince the person to seek those more substantial interventions.

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#24

Post by sn41 »

hiddencost wrote: post #13
tonymet wrote: post #7

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Does this number actually help? It’s shared kind of automatically but I find it trivializes suicide

I've volunteered fairly regularly on one of the member hotlines, and have personally attempted suicide. Out of 1000 calls I had one person attempt, maybe 10 people decide not to attempt, and the rest were just people who were anxious or sad or scared and were having thoughts. There's a very broad spectrum, and for someone who is hopeless or just lonely and sad, talking to a caring human who listens and is comfortable…

It will be also great if you can briefly outline some of the things you tell them. I can't imagine the responsibility on the shoulders of a person who is trying to save a life at the other end of the line. Thank you for your service.

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#25

Post by spondyl »

dhaivat wrote: post #4

It goes without saying that this year has been really difficult for most if not all of us. Not being able to see extended family especially during holiday season can feel lonely and depressing. Please, please, please don't make this a solo suffering, use FaceTime, Xoom, WhatsApp, Meet whatever to talk to friends/family if you can. If things feel worse - don't keep it to yourself, for those in the US - 1-800-273-8255'…

In a similar but less urgent vein, if you're having a quiet holiday much like myself but could do with a(n asynchronous) chat, feel free to send anything through to the email listed on my profile.

Likewise, I'm sure other HNers may like to announce as such but just need a little nudge :)

---

I'm sure plenty of bios have contact invitations but us humans are pretty bad at the idea of cold calling strangers

I sort of wish there was a service for internet pen pals where the emails were purposely delayed come to think of it

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#26

Post by kodah »

tonymet wrote: post #7
dhaivat wrote: post #4

It goes without saying that this year has been really difficult for most if not all of us. Not being able to see extended family especially during holiday season can feel lonely and depressing. Please, please, please don't make this a solo suffering, use FaceTime, Xoom, WhatsApp, Meet whatever to talk to friends/family if you can. If things feel worse - don't keep it to yourself, for those in the US - 1-800-273-8255'…

Does this number actually help? It’s shared kind of automatically but I find it trivializes suicide

I have not used this number and sometimes when these kind of numbers are included in news pieces I have a big eye roll due to it looking like a rubber stamp. That said, I'm part of other groups that are certainly in on-going crises and I'd love to see our resources plastered everywhere, sincerity or not. At the very least it makes some people stop and think, some may donate, some may volunteer. That's worth my eye rolls.

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#27

Post by DougN7 »

laurent92 wrote: post #17
warent wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I was a younger going through a very painful time there was a brief period of suicidal ideation and the suicide hotline would have been a very useful resource for me. I didn't know about it at the time, so I just called 911, and they were very kind to me but their response was absolutely awful. It was pretty clear they weren't trained for such conversations, and just send the police to pick me up. The police! Fo…

Same kind of experience here in France. I could only find 7 numbers, 2 of which for women only and 1 for teens. So I tried the 4 others and met answering machines such as (textually) “We are open Tuesday 5pm-9pm”. Needless to say, I wish they’d be at least open midnight-to-1am, that would be more useful, it was my peak symptom time. Even more seriously, it is really hard to call someone when depressed, let alone nag…

I’m glad you’re here. Keep using those resources! If you ever want to talk I can listen.

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#28

Post by DanBC »

dhaivat wrote: post #4

It goes without saying that this year has been really difficult for most if not all of us. Not being able to see extended family especially during holiday season can feel lonely and depressing. Please, please, please don't make this a solo suffering, use FaceTime, Xoom, WhatsApp, Meet whatever to talk to friends/family if you can. If things feel worse - don't keep it to yourself, for those in the US - 1-800-273-8255'…

If people just want a chat there's a Twitter thing called #JoinIn.

People get together for informal chats on Christmas day. It has a UK focus, which affects the times it'll be busiest.

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#29

Post by doliveira »

tonymet wrote: post #9
dhaivat wrote: post #4

It goes without saying that this year has been really difficult for most if not all of us. Not being able to see extended family especially during holiday season can feel lonely and depressing. Please, please, please don't make this a solo suffering, use FaceTime, Xoom, WhatsApp, Meet whatever to talk to friends/family if you can. If things feel worse - don't keep it to yourself, for those in the US - 1-800-273-8255'…

It’s like the “thoughts and prayers “ cliche – something that sounds nice but lacks meaning

Thoughts and prayers is literally doing nothing, though. Not comparable at all

Re: I am lonely will anyone speak to me

#30

Post by donretag »

dhaivat wrote: post #4

It goes without saying that this year has been really difficult for most if not all of us. Not being able to see extended family especially during holiday season can feel lonely and depressing. Please, please, please don't make this a solo suffering, use FaceTime, Xoom, WhatsApp, Meet whatever to talk to friends/family if you can. If things feel worse - don't keep it to yourself, for those in the US - 1-800-273-8255'…

"there is a light at the end of this fucking tunnel and we will get through it."

As someone that was lonely before COVID, there is no light at the end. Makind friends when over 30 is incredibly difficult. Being an big extrovert in isolation is tough. I want to work in an office, but I probably never will again in our industry.

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