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Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

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Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#51

Post by cactus2093 »

PaulRobinson wrote: post #40
war1025 wrote: post #38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> My one on ones with my manager have become repetitive My 1:1s with my boss are basically useless and I think we're both aware of that. What do people generally talk about in 1:1s? I've never really been clear what the purpose is other than to check a box and say it happened.

1. Opportunities for timely feedback (in both directions) 2. Concerns/issues 3. General chat Most people forget the third option. It’s OK if it’s just time to hang out with each other. That said, it’s your meeting more than it is your manager’s. If you want to cancel, you should. However, frequent cancellation is a signal of a problem to my mind. As a manager, the only thing more frustrating than a 1:1 which is like…

Except in unusual circumstances, I normally find that #1 and #2 don't change much on the one or two week cadence that 1:1s usually happen. Every couple months there might be a significant amount of time spent on one of these, and then there might be a few check-ins on that afterwards, but in most cases it's not anywhere near enough time to fill a 30 minute slot every 2 weeks.

I also at some point personally started making a conscious effort to spend less time on #2, bringing up concerns/issues. Nine times out of ten nothing will come out of it anyway (most things are out of your manager's control), and nobody likes a complainer. Your effort is better spent practicing meditation, or else applying to new jobs if things are really bad, rather than spending half an hour every week "voicing concerns" in a 1:1.

That basically leaves a large majority of 1:1 time spent on #3, which I totally agree with the parent comment gets awkward after a while.

I have started wonder if the 1:1 in tech is an "emperor has no clothes" type of situation. Am I so unusual? Or do we all just go along pretending that these are super essential to a functional team, while in practice not much really ever comes of them?

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#52

Post by spaetzleesser »

My number one advice would be to actually listen to what the underlings have to say and keep the groups small. I have been to two of these lately and each time the VPs held long monologues that were only interrupted by some people who tried to suck up to the manger by loudly agreeing. The rest was just sitting around and said nothing.

If you aren’t willing to receive negative feedback about your own role maybe you shouldn’t do these meetings.

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#53

Post by buckminster »

username90 wrote: post #26
hammock wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>I see no reason why you'd have to be more careful in those meetings than the 1:1 with your manager The first thing that comes to mind is you wouldn't want to tell your skip level manager anything that you wouldn't (or haven't already) told your direct manager. That's going outside the chain of command and creates political and organizational issues that no one will appreciate.

> That's going outside the chain of command and creates political and organizational issues that no one will appreciate. I'd refuse to work anywhere that cares about chain of command. Managers are for bookkeeping purposes, not commanding. If your manager doesn't let you talk to the people you need to talk to to get things done then it is a very toxic environment.

This is half true. When I was an employee I viewed the chain of command as existing for my benefit, not my manager's. If some random bigwig wanted me to do something for them I would direct them to my manager. It wasn't my job to arbitrate between differing management demands on my time.

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#54

Post by 1MoreThing »

username90 wrote: post #26
hammock wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>I see no reason why you'd have to be more careful in those meetings than the 1:1 with your manager The first thing that comes to mind is you wouldn't want to tell your skip level manager anything that you wouldn't (or haven't already) told your direct manager. That's going outside the chain of command and creates political and organizational issues that no one will appreciate.

> That's going outside the chain of command and creates political and organizational issues that no one will appreciate. I'd refuse to work anywhere that cares about chain of command. Managers are for bookkeeping purposes, not commanding. If your manager doesn't let you talk to the people you need to talk to to get things done then it is a very toxic environment.

Managers aren't for bookkeeping or commanding; they're for leadership.

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#55

Post by throwaway98797 »

buckminster wrote: post #53
username90 wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> That's going outside the chain of command and creates political and organizational issues that no one will appreciate. I'd refuse to work anywhere that cares about chain of command. Managers are for bookkeeping purposes, not commanding. If your manager doesn't let you talk to the people you need to talk to to get things done then it is a very toxic environment.

This is half true. When I was an employee I viewed the chain of command as existing for my benefit, not my manager's. If some random bigwig wanted me to do something for them I would direct them to my manager. It wasn't my job to arbitrate between differing management demands on my time.

Know who butters your bread.

I always did whatever the higher power wanted. It served me well.

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#56

Post by huntsman »

silicon2401 wrote: post #9

Does anybody have advice on how to make the most of meetings with coworkers/mentors 2+ levels up the ladder from yourself? I once had a great session with a c-suite exec in an employer with 5 digits worth of employees, but I think that was as much due to his being a really motivated mentor as any prep or questions I did. I want to make sure I'm prepared for future meetings if the mentor is not as open or enthusiastic…

I've found that the most useful discussions I've had are around how the people up the ladder think about the junior persons area/projects and how it fits into the bigger picture.

The junior person knows more about the details and the senior person should understand more about the strategy so both have a chance to learn from each other and to each walk away with a better overall perspective.

As a skip level manager myself it's also seems like a better use of everyones time than me answering generic questions.

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#57

Post by silicon2401 »

curiousllama wrote: post #11
silicon2401 wrote: post #9

Does anybody have advice on how to make the most of meetings with coworkers/mentors 2+ levels up the ladder from yourself? I once had a great session with a c-suite exec in an employer with 5 digits worth of employees, but I think that was as much due to his being a really motivated mentor as any prep or questions I did. I want to make sure I'm prepared for future meetings if the mentor is not as open or enthusiastic…

Think about purpose and benefit. A cynical view, perhaps, but the way to a good relationship is to make it part of the transaction. What are this person's priorities (outcomes they need to make happen) for the year? How can you help make that happen? Come to the conversation with "you're doing X; how can I help make that happen?" - and when you explain why you want to help, make it personal ("I want to get to Y, and…

I'm more than happy to take cynical views, I find they're often what I would consider just realistic.

That's a great breakdown and it makes total sense. I've found people respond well when you already know stuff about them. Do you think it would be even better to come in with something like this? "I know you want to achieve X this year, and I have an idea Y or a personal goal Z to help us get there. What do you think?" Or do you think that would be getting too ahead of things?

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#58

Post by silicon2401 »

codemac wrote: post #19
silicon2401 wrote: post #9

Does anybody have advice on how to make the most of meetings with coworkers/mentors 2+ levels up the ladder from yourself? I once had a great session with a c-suite exec in an employer with 5 digits worth of employees, but I think that was as much due to his being a really motivated mentor as any prep or questions I did. I want to make sure I'm prepared for future meetings if the mentor is not as open or enthusiastic…

You want them to be a sponsor of your work to others. At that level of seniority they could really make a difference in your promotion and growth over time if they know who you are and what problems you're solving. Mentorship should be about someone telling you what they did when they were in your shoes, and coaching is more like performance optimization.

This comment is gold. Even with some jobs and plenty of effort to learn career skills behind me, I feel like I'm only just starting to appreciate the value of someone higher up being a sponsor of your work. Thanks for really singling that out and explaining how it matters.

Your second point is also really insightful. That distinction is also something I've recently begun to really realize, and your wording cuts right to the point. Thanks for your advice!

As a follow up, in your experience, what kind of stuff has been received especially well by higher-ups?

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#59

Post by silicon2401 »

strife25 wrote: post #24
silicon2401 wrote: post #9

Does anybody have advice on how to make the most of meetings with coworkers/mentors 2+ levels up the ladder from yourself? I once had a great session with a c-suite exec in an employer with 5 digits worth of employees, but I think that was as much due to his being a really motivated mentor as any prep or questions I did. I want to make sure I'm prepared for future meetings if the mentor is not as open or enthusiastic…

Ask them what the top 3 problems they are spending time on. That will uncover areas for you to invest in understanding to uncover solutions. People at this level are looking for help from people that are doing the real work in the organization who have a better understanding of the details. Conversely, this level has a wider view of problems that have high impact across the organization. Seek to uncover those problem…

That's super helpful, I'll definitely make sure to do that. As a follow-up, if the mentor were way higher up the ladder than you, how would you translate the really high-level goals they see to goals that are actionable to your level? I've had a couple meetings that went along these lines, and I was a bit unsure how to take their executive/c-suite perspective into something I could work on as an individual contributor

Re: Skip Level Meeting Guide for Leaders

#60

Post by silicon2401 »

huntsman wrote: post #56
silicon2401 wrote: post #9

Does anybody have advice on how to make the most of meetings with coworkers/mentors 2+ levels up the ladder from yourself? I once had a great session with a c-suite exec in an employer with 5 digits worth of employees, but I think that was as much due to his being a really motivated mentor as any prep or questions I did. I want to make sure I'm prepared for future meetings if the mentor is not as open or enthusiastic…

I've found that the most useful discussions I've had are around how the people up the ladder think about the junior persons area/projects and how it fits into the bigger picture. The junior person knows more about the details and the senior person should understand more about the strategy so both have a chance to learn from each other and to each walk away with a better overall perspective. As a skip level manager my…

That's helpful as it gives me a sense of how I can also try to bring value to the meeting. What kind of questions have you found useful/practical from these meetings? I always want to be careful not to ask something that comes off too basic or uninformed.
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