A colleague took me to Tamahide restaurant in Tokyo, which opened in 1760 and is known for creating oyakodon, a chicken and egg rice bowl. (Oyakadon translates to "parent and child donburi" which somehow makes eating a combination of chicken and egg a little less appealing). Looking at reviews today, people apparently see the food as a mixed bag - some are clearly disappointed. In my opinion, it was excellent, with t…
> Tokyo is an amazing city, though it can be very lonely for an expat. Could you expand upon this? I've been thinking of moving there for a year or two to focus on my language skills and work on my startup. I spent a lot of time in Obihiro, Hokkaido in my late teens and had a blast hanging out at the university. Everyone was super friendly. When I traveled to even more remote towns like Hobetsu / Mukawa, Makubetsu, A…
I found it lonely for the same reason I loved the city: it was so familiar, and yet so different at the same time. I felt like gears that were slightly out of mesh, not enough to snap, but enough to wear away the edges and cause subtle damage over time.
Making friends as an adult is always hard, but being a transplant into such a new culture is even harder. Everyone was friendly, but finding true connection is difficult: language barriers, cultural differences, biases (on both sides), and perhaps the transitory nature of my stay meant there was always a constant difference.
I always felt like an outsider, even when welcomed warmly. Maybe this was me, but I always knew I was being accommodated: "he's a gaijin, he doesn't know better." This was absolutely kind, but I also knew that I didn't know better, and didn't know what I didn't know, and that created a subtle tentativeness and friction in social interactions.
The classic scenes of Tokyo streets with tall buildings filled with small shops and laced with vertical signage is an apt metaphor for living in Tokyo. There is so much hidden behind the facades that it takes a lifetime to know what's really there, unless you have a guide with infinite patience.
Maybe other cities, or towns, would be different. Maybe it would be much easier if I was fluent, or planned to stay for years. Maybe someone without tendencies towards introversion, or who went with a partner to lean on, would have a very different experience.
But like I said, many small factors just wore on me, and I was happy to return to the warm embrace of home.
I'm afraid I don't know enough about the startup scene to do more than speculate. I was there representing an enterprise software company, which has very different dynamics - especially in Japan.