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How to buy gifts that people actually want

willpatrick.co.uk

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Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#111

Post by dsr_ »

Afton wrote: post #74
dsr_ wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Since I know about knives, I would buy them a knife. If I was an accomplished bread baker, I would give them a couple of loaves each week for a month -- unless I knew they had a dietary issue. Don't buy a book about programming for a programmer; do buy the best book on programming in Python for a kid who shows interest.

You can, but if you consider knives an uninteresting kitchen tool, then you have just given them a $300 knife that they will feel bad about every time they use it open a can of beans. btw: if you do know about knives, please hit me up at my email address and let me pick your brain a bit. [Edit: my email address wasn't in my profile. fixed, but I'll reach out to folks shortly, thanks!].

Part of knowing something about knives is in selecting the right tool(s) for the users. I'm not going to buy a 200mm gyuto for my parents; I got them a set of [chef's knife, bread knife, paring knife] that is miles better than what they had and still holds up well because I know it's only going to be sharpened when I come to visit.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#112

Post by Chris2048 »

joshstrange wrote: post #21

Best gift advice I give regularly: Keep a note on your phone (doesn't matter the app Apple Notes, Google Keep, SimpleNote, Drafts, etc) with a header for each person you want to get a gift for. Throughout the year whenever you hear them say "I love X author" or "I'm getting into Y hobby" then add a little note under their name. These can be as simple as "Coconut La Croix is their favorite seltzer flavor and brand" to…

This means they get stuff they once made an offhand comment about, rather than stuff people think they might like. I once bought a book by a certain author and liked it as a kid), I then got books by that author for the next few years.

If I was "getting into Y hobby" I'd probably research my own tools for it, and would hate if someone bought something random, e.g. I'd hate if someone bought me a random RAM module. How do they know what speed, or how many slots I have?

consumables like Selzer (or cologne) are pretty safe, somewhat although boring gifts. It's better if their favourite X if also something that's expensive enough that they don't buy it frequently anyway.

That said, I often see cool items that I think "that would make a cool gift", that's what to make note of.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#113

Post by Chris2048 »

Afton wrote: post #74
dsr_ wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Since I know about knives, I would buy them a knife. If I was an accomplished bread baker, I would give them a couple of loaves each week for a month -- unless I knew they had a dietary issue. Don't buy a book about programming for a programmer; do buy the best book on programming in Python for a kid who shows interest.

You can, but if you consider knives an uninteresting kitchen tool, then you have just given them a $300 knife that they will feel bad about every time they use it open a can of beans. btw: if you do know about knives, please hit me up at my email address and let me pick your brain a bit. [Edit: my email address wasn't in my profile. fixed, but I'll reach out to folks shortly, thanks!].

Anyone opening a can with a knife should feel bad about it.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#115

Post by war1025 »

free2OSS wrote: post #103

My buddy loves taco bell fire sauce. I've been saving my extras all year. He actually buys the containers at the grocery store. Time to see if he likes it. Edit- we don't exchange gifts and we both have plenty of money. Half joke gift, half useful.

We went trick or treating with some friends this year and afterward when we were eating the candy, my friend mentioned that he always loved Airheads growing up and was swiping them out of his son's basket.

Thinking of getting him a box of them for Christmas just as a "I noticed something you liked" type gift.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#116

Post by Hamuko »

joshstrange wrote: post #21

Best gift advice I give regularly: Keep a note on your phone (doesn't matter the app Apple Notes, Google Keep, SimpleNote, Drafts, etc) with a header for each person you want to get a gift for. Throughout the year whenever you hear them say "I love X author" or "I'm getting into Y hobby" then add a little note under their name. These can be as simple as "Coconut La Croix is their favorite seltzer flavor and brand" to…

Can confirm this idea.

Got my mom a pair of Bose noise-cancelling headphones since she was asking about headphone recommendations earlier. That was definitely a gift that worked out and I think she's been using them for the last three years now.

I also got my dad an iFixit toolkit for Christmas after he saw mine and asked me to order him one if I was ever going to order from that particular store again.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#117

Post by jeffreyrogers »

joshstrange wrote: post #21

Best gift advice I give regularly: Keep a note on your phone (doesn't matter the app Apple Notes, Google Keep, SimpleNote, Drafts, etc) with a header for each person you want to get a gift for. Throughout the year whenever you hear them say "I love X author" or "I'm getting into Y hobby" then add a little note under their name. These can be as simple as "Coconut La Croix is their favorite seltzer flavor and brand" to…

I was going to post the same advice. I haven't had trouble coming up with gift ideas for family/friends I see regularly since doing this.

Also, thanks for referencing BarkBox. I wasn't aware of it before.

Edit: As an additional benefit, if you start doing this people will shocked that you remembered some offhand comment they made so they think you're a much better listener than you actually are.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#118

Post by Bokanovsky »

What we do is have the idea of a present box. When we're out shopping (well in the days when you could go out shopping). If we saw something that would look like a good gift for person X or person Y we'd buy it and put it in the present box. It might be a book or a certain item of some kind.

Then when it comes to near a birthday or Christmas we'd check what's in the present box to see if we have anything suitable for them. If not we'd then go through the process of buying something. But the present box has saved us countless times as we'd often buy something thoughtful and put it in there in advance.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#119

Post by funkymike »

_carbyau_ wrote: post #78
joshstrange wrote: post #21

Best gift advice I give regularly: Keep a note on your phone (doesn't matter the app Apple Notes, Google Keep, SimpleNote, Drafts, etc) with a header for each person you want to get a gift for. Throughout the year whenever you hear them say "I love X author" or "I'm getting into Y hobby" then add a little note under their name. These can be as simple as "Coconut La Croix is their favorite seltzer flavor and brand" to…

Personally, I haven't implemented this though I know I should... but I came across this idea in Robert Heinleins Double Star as a reference to Farley Files. In essence, Farley was Roosevelts aid and kept files on everyone he met so before meeting them again Roosevelt could cram study and "recall everything about them" like they were a close personal friend. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Farley_file For some reason th…

This reminds me of a video I recently watched comparing Sherlock Holmes to a software developer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUZZKtypink

Holmes apparently kept detailed notes on every case but would otherwise forget the details until he needed to go back to them later.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#120

Post by robocat »

ebg13 wrote: post #32
Afton wrote: post #4

Interesting that they didn't really touch on what I consider the hardest part of buying for someone: domain expertise. If I am known as 'into' something, then the likelihood that someone who isn't also into that same thing will come up with a good gift is shockingly low. I bake bread, for example. A book of 100 bread recipes is basically dead weight to me. I have a friend who is really into knives of various sorts. E…

I have this problem often. I want very few things, I can easily afford everything I want, and the things I might want fall into two categories: 1. I already know the most about the thing and have already found the one that either maximizes the utility/price relationship or maximizes utility below my price sensitivity threshold. 2. I don't know the most about the thing yet and have therefore not decided what I want. T…

> Buy them only weird sentimental things ... A small piece of artwork that comes with a note saying "This made me think of you" carries sentimental value

It is incredibly hard to do this without giving someone a burden. The recipient often feels an obligation to keep obviously sentimental gifts, even if they hate them (that piece of art your dear aunt gave you).

Or maybe worse when the receiver loves dust collectors, and has a horde of clutter that you have just added to.

Certainly you are inviting them to reciprocate with something sentimental, which now you can’t throw away even though you have no place to put it.

It can be done, but you have to be really in tune with their tastes or listened carefully to what they like (e.g. I love some artists, but can really hate some of an artists oeuvre or I might not have a suitable place for it, so it is hard to pick something for me).

> and will make the receiver think of giver every time they look at it

Sometimes that could be selfish (depends on relationship etcetera).

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