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How to buy gifts that people actually want

willpatrick.co.uk

81–90 of 285 posts

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#81
post #74
post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Since I know about knives, I would buy them a knife. If I was an accomplished bread baker, I would give them a couple of loaves each week for a month -- unless I knew they had a dietary issue. Don't buy a book about programming for a programmer; do buy the best book on programming in Python for a kid who shows interest.

You can, but if you consider knives an uninteresting kitchen tool, then you have just given them a $300 knife that they will feel bad about every time they use it open a can of beans. btw: if you do know about knives, please hit me up at my email address and let me pick your brain a bit. [Edit: my email address wasn't in my profile. fixed, but I'll reach out to folks shortly, thanks!].

Hey I don't see your email address in your profile but I know a bit about knives and would be happy to answer any questions

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#83
post #40
post #18

What do you do if you genuinely don't want anything? It seems like people don't believe you and keep harassing you asking for what you really want, and then get really frustrated when you keep saying "No, really I don't want anything ". Then they either respect your wishes and don't get anything, but seem to harbor some kind of resentment against you in their heart, or they get some random garbage you don't want and…

Ask for food. You always need food. They can make it themselves, such as a favorite recipe, which will make it special to them. Or they can buy something that they like and think that you might like, which conveys a connection between you. If it's good, you get a great memory. Even if it's not, it's soon gone, and not weighing down your life. There are some who have rigorous diets or otherwise don't want their routin…

Food is pretty good. But its not perfect, I don't want a bunch of, say, chocolate since I'll eat it all and feel bad.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#84
When I was traveling for work back in the late 90s, I bought a GustBuster umbrella out of the SkyMall magazine for my brother's HS graduation. He used it all 7 years of undergrad and law school.

I may have even used the seat-back phone to order it while flying...

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#85

Best gift advice I give regularly: Keep a note on your phone (doesn't matter the app Apple Notes, Google Keep, SimpleNote, Drafts, etc) with a header for each person you want to get a gift for. Throughout the year whenever you hear them say "I love X author" or "I'm getting into Y hobby" then add a little note under their name. These can be as simple as "Coconut La Croix is their favorite seltzer flavor and brand" to…

I've been doing this for a couple of years and can vouch that it works.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#86
post #18

What do you do if you genuinely don't want anything? It seems like people don't believe you and keep harassing you asking for what you really want, and then get really frustrated when you keep saying "No, really I don't want anything ". Then they either respect your wishes and don't get anything, but seem to harbor some kind of resentment against you in their heart, or they get some random garbage you don't want and…

I too hate being bought stuff that I don't need or want. Honestly I have too much stuff as it is, and nothing I already own needs replacing. The idea of yet more stuff entering my life, creating needless waste is actually a little distressing. I'm lucky to be in that position or course.

Ask for consumerble stuff, food, drink, that sort of thing. I like interesting beers, cheeses, that sort of thing. Think about the sort of things you like and ask for "posh" or "interesting" versions of it. It gives people an opportunity to exercise their gift buying powers, but whatever they get you will be gone once you consume it.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#87
post #32
post #4

Interesting that they didn't really touch on what I consider the hardest part of buying for someone: domain expertise. If I am known as 'into' something, then the likelihood that someone who isn't also into that same thing will come up with a good gift is shockingly low. I bake bread, for example. A book of 100 bread recipes is basically dead weight to me. I have a friend who is really into knives of various sorts. E…

I have this problem often. I want very few things, I can easily afford everything I want, and the things I might want fall into two categories: 1. I already know the most about the thing and have already found the one that either maximizes the utility/price relationship or maximizes utility below my price sensitivity threshold. 2. I don't know the most about the thing yet and have therefore not decided what I want. T…

The sweet spot is consumables that will improve their life, but that they don't feel like spending money on. Let them indulge in quality food, candles, wine, clothes, tools, etc.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#88

I generally give people things I'd like to have. This year everyone's getting an iFixit Pro Tech Toolkit. They might not need it now or ever but I like encouraging self repair (and often "self" ends up being me).

This. Find something you would like for yourself and that is at least possibly related to the recipient's interests. Makes for much easier shopping...

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#89
post #83
post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Ask for food. You always need food. They can make it themselves, such as a favorite recipe, which will make it special to them. Or they can buy something that they like and think that you might like, which conveys a connection between you. If it's good, you get a great memory. Even if it's not, it's soon gone, and not weighing down your life. There are some who have rigorous diets or otherwise don't want their routin…

Food is pretty good. But its not perfect, I don't want a bunch of, say, chocolate since I'll eat it all and feel bad.

Ah, but that's the best thing about being given food, you can share it with other people in a way you can't with other presents. In fact I often find the person who gave me the food will be really up for trying whatever it was with me.

Re: How to buy gifts that people actually want

#90

Buying a gift is such a 20th century thing. Maybe reaching out to someone on phone or in person, every now and then, in times of happiness and despair, is a greater gift. Dishing out money is the easy way out.

I have a feeling that the practice predates the 20th century by quite some time.
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