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My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

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Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#161

Post by cambalache »

bigbubba wrote: post #139
cambalache wrote: post #63

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, a girl doing OnlyFans is making money.

Turning that into a career seems like a moonshot, making it comparable to other "achieve celebrity" plans young adults may have (become a movie star, become a famous youtuber, become a famous rockstar, etc) I think in general these aspirations shouldn't be shat on, but young adults with these aspirations should probably be gently guided in more realistic directions.

You dont have too, the time investment is minimal,many girls were already taking erotic pics anyway. If you are attractive you can ride that wave for several years and keep living your life normally.

I've noticed that many of these girls are college students and the money from their admirers is useful to buy clothes, gadgets and to take their boyfriends to fancy vacations.

So as long as you are aware this is a bubble you will be doing fine.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#162

Post by rkangel »

parksy wrote: post #45

My dad smashed my computer around the laundry (where the computer lived) with my cricket bat because I was "playing games" instead of studying. "playing games" was using assembly language and pascal with s3m libraries to program a game. With my kids I've felt the rise of anger when they want to be autonomous and pursue their own interests. I mean, I was taught that parenthood is subjugation. But just like my dad coul…

I think there's a big gulf between Minecraft, Roblox, Facetime and even Youtube when compared to TikTok/Snapchat/Facebook.

Not all screen time is created equal, and there are any number of ways for a child to be creative and learn and socialise in the digital world as suppose to the physical one.

The social networks are a bit different. What value is a child getting from them that they wouldn't get from a WhatsApp group? As other commenters have pointed out, these big platforms are engineered to the last detail to 'increase engagement'. To put it another way - they are purposefully addictive and I don't see the value that might make that worthwhile.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#163

Post by Aerroon »

AnIdiotOnTheNet wrote: post #132
sequoia wrote: post #87

Buried lede: > My daughter doesn’t return home from school until 6:30 pm and still has to eat, bathe, and get ready for bed. Perhaps it is not just the iPhone, but school taking up 100% of her time, energy, and attention that is preventing her from pursuing creative interests? As a homeschooling parent whose kids have been in school at times, I see this first hand. School is exhausting . Between rising unnaturally ea…

> School is exhausting. Between rising unnaturally early (which leaves kids tired), rushing and bustling kids on their daily commute, most of the daylight hours blocked for school then homework when you get home I will point out though that, if one is inclined to argue that school should prepare children for adult life, it sounds like this system is a pretty good mimic of the working life any given child is likely to…

Yes, but the difference is that as an adult you choose to be there. You can make arrangements that fit what you want. Kids don't have that option. They often don't even realize that they themselves might've put too much on their own plate and might not know how to handle it. They just don't burn out the same way adults do.

As an aside, if school was preparation for adult life then it really should teach you to drive, cook, and an understanding of the law. There are few things that school teaches that end up being more important than those for adults.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#164

Post by foobarian »

ttul wrote: post #96
sequoia wrote: post #87

Buried lede: > My daughter doesn’t return home from school until 6:30 pm and still has to eat, bathe, and get ready for bed. Perhaps it is not just the iPhone, but school taking up 100% of her time, energy, and attention that is preventing her from pursuing creative interests? As a homeschooling parent whose kids have been in school at times, I see this first hand. School is exhausting . Between rising unnaturally ea…

I have done home schooling and regular public schooling. If you can afford to have a parent be at home full time with your kids, you are amongst the wealthiest in the world. You are fortunate.

I think some of the replies that add "poorest" may have taken your comment too literally. Truly there is no greater treasure in the world than be able to spend that amount of time with your child. We have some neighbors who are not too well off that homeschool their kids, and they are the most engaged and loving family I know on our block. It makes me smile any time I see them interact.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#165

Post by dijksterhuis »

pbhjpbhj wrote: post #60
dijksterhuis wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> That's a bit like saying addictive drugs themselves aren't a problem. I mean... They're not. They're inanimate f----- objects. They've never maliciously set out to cause someone harm because they're inanimate f----- objects. They don't have an understanding of the concept of morals or ethics because they're inanimate f----- objects. When I ingest them into my body -- that's when all hell breaks loose. They become a…

So, how about when your schoolwork requires you to 'ingest the drugs', you visit YouTube to watch the video your teacher picked out (they did a bad job IMO, but hey) ... then you're supposed to leave [cold turkey!] and get on with your work, except the website is highly animate and designed carefully to entice you to stay. All of a sudden you're spending the afternoon watching dross on YT because kids lack self-contr…

In your YouTube example there are are few people that have responsibilities:

- teacher

- video maker

- YouTube Devs

- companies

- "kids"

- individual

- school

- etc

YouTube (the drug) is just a series of instructions that make a slab of glass light up in a certain pattern and a speaker to oscillate in a particular fashion (depending on hardware).

It's an inanimate f----- object. It doesn't have "responsibilities".

That's the point I'm getting at. Why don't we, collectively, stop blaming the drugs/tech and start finding solutions to the actual problem?

It's easy to point the blame finger, it's harder to solve a problem.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#166

Post by JoeCianflone »

_lffv wrote: post #150
JoeCianflone wrote: post #109

What a load of shit. I’m sorry I have an 11 year old who has an iPod touch the real problem here is lax parenting. My son cannot use his phone alone in his room alone, he doesn’t have TikTok or any social media apps. He cannot take it to school (not that there’s a school to go to at the moment) or take it out of the house unless he asks first and 95% of the time we don’t let him. Kids test—that’s like an iron law of…

I had parents sort of like you when I was younger, which is why I attempted suicide at 14. Strict parenting puts weights on your kids' backs. Eventually they'll snap in half.

1 I’m sorry about your attempted suicide and I hope you’re ok now. 2 We are not that strict, my kids have limits but they are known and they know what happens if they break the rules. But you are right there is a balance and this parent seems to not be balanced at all and they’re blaming the phone. She said her daughter wore her down and she caved and allowed her TikTok—I’m sorry but as a parent that is on her. Limits do need to grow and change as the kid gets older but unfettered access to everything at 11 is not the phones fault.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#167

Post by nartz »

The key is NOT the phone itself, but the APPS and the Use of the phone.

Author seems to be struggling with the connected-kid culture around apps like Instagram and TikTok - which are transforming the school-based culture to something where to be popular, you have to be connected and posting. This is what needs to be controlled IMHO.

As many mention, there are MANY positive uses where the phone is a 100% better medium to teach or learn than old school books or otherwise.

With my kids, I focus on installing and limiting the games and videos to ones that I find productive and educational.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#168

Post by in_cahoots »

rekabis wrote: post #110
ttul wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have done home schooling and regular public schooling. If you can afford to have a parent be at home full time with your kids, you are amongst the wealthiest in the world. You are fortunate.

Or the poorest. Especially if you cannot find a job that pays more than daytime child care costs. Then it’s cheaper to have a parent stay at home, despite the poverty level, because any daycare available costs more than any available job brings in.

That's true for young kids, but not preteens. By that age they're old enough to stay home alone for a couple of hours after school. Hence the term 'latchkey kid'.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#169

Post by stunt »

Seriously!! I’m sure we all have something to say about this. But, this isn’t the type of content that we normally discuss here. I hate to point out something is off-topic, and I know even that is against guideline. But, sometimes I feel that HN must add a checkmark to the submit form to confirm what you are posting is relevant as a reminder.

Re: My daughter was a creative genius, and then we bought her an iPhone

#170

Post by oscargrouch »

cambalache wrote: post #63
bcfgh123 wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Isn't a boy coding assembly a bit different than a girl doing TikTok, OnlyFans etc.?

Yes, a girl doing OnlyFans is making money.

That could only do so because someone learned how to program in assembly even if not being payed for it. A good example of how making money not always equate to making value. There would be no Mark Zuckerberg without Rasmus Lerdorf. And if both were in the same room with me, it would be with Rasmus that i would like to talk to, because it doesnt matter that his net worth is peanuts compared to Zuckerberg, because from my perspective at least he created more value to society doing harder things than Zuckerberg.

With Tiktok, Youtube and the like, the comparison gets even worse when you compare the abyss of money making vs. value produced..

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