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Ask HN: Are you depressed?

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Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#261

Post by quickthrower2 »

DangitBobby wrote: post #224
swat535 wrote: post #186

Nowhere else to post this so here it goes. I lost my job in January. From January - March I started looking for a job and then COVID hits at the height of my search, now suddenly no one is hiring and all the businesses are slowing down. My girlfriend of 13 years left me the day after my birthday in June before I had a chance to propose to her, I had to return the ring, she had no idea and I never told her about it. I…

I find that Reddit sucks the joy out of my day. There's just something about that site.

It's about what subs you choose. Choose some genuinely funny ones, and not too much time on them and it can be a positive! And some of the programming subs are really nice communities. Supportive, helpful and informative.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#262

Post by flightless »

i5heu wrote: post #247
DangitBobby wrote: post #224

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I find that Reddit sucks the joy out of my day. There's just something about that site.

The world is burning in a lot of ways. Am I think the content on Reddit represents the realisation and fears of that. I was getting super depressed lately and cut, as a result of that, almost all news, Reddit and Twitter out of my life. The situation is just to crazy to deal with it every day.

The world isn't burning, the media definitely is though. That's a dying animal doing everything it can to keep your eyes glued to the "latest disaster" and their ads of course. We are going to get a vaccine and slowly work back to normal. If you are concerned about the world, do something about your little slice of the world. Pick up some trash and drop some groceries off for an elderly neighbor.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#263

Post by saiya-jin »

tdsamardzhiev wrote: post #248

My observation is that most smart people are very prone to depression if they stop and think about stuff. And yeah, the ongoing global pandemic, social isolation and economical crisis isn’t making that any better.

Well its very easy to get quickly depressed about this world, how properly fucked up it is and always was. How sociopathic bullshitters and strongmen rule, instead of aim for greater good that would at the end benefit us all, including those on the very top. To know that its perfectly possible to have a proper paradise here, sustainable, peaceful, yet we will never get there unless we change some pretty fundamental human traits.

And that is ignoring all the crap that went down this year and still coming strong.

I would say it actually takes quite a bit of ignorance to ward off semi-constant depression. What helps, I mean properly helps, apart from professional help is frequent physical activity and being in the nature, ideally both combined. Nature has some weird magic effect of recharging some imaginary internal battery and helps you take more life's bullshit and just keep going. Works for literally everybody I know. Covid obviously heavily interferes with both, depending on location.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#264

Post by Subsentient »

flightless wrote: post #255
Subsentient wrote: post #246

I was miserable before it was cool. Before the pandemic, I had a development job in the neighboring city. I'd take a 2 hour commute each way, and when I got home, I'd immediately collapse, sleep, wake up, and head right back to work. I didn't check my phone, my voicemail, my email, or call anyone. Just sleep. I rarely ate. I listened to a lot of death metal during that time. The pandemic hit, and I lost my job, then…

Favorite death metal bands?

Swallow the Sun, Be'lakor, Draconian, Dark Tranquillity, Insomnium, Evocation.

I'm big into melodic death metal.

This single, 30 minute song was my soundtrack for the commute right before the pandemic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvIoVj9RdgQ

Lately, I've been listening to Under a Godless Veil by Draconian, it just came out on Oct 30th.

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2lGs75svWhlB0B7SS4Ke...

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#265

Post by Fishysoup »

swat535 wrote: post #186

Nowhere else to post this so here it goes. I lost my job in January. From January - March I started looking for a job and then COVID hits at the height of my search, now suddenly no one is hiring and all the businesses are slowing down. My girlfriend of 13 years left me the day after my birthday in June before I had a chance to propose to her, I had to return the ring, she had no idea and I never told her about it. I…

Try therapy and, if necessary, medication. Both of those have completely turned my life around. Things are still shitty sometimes (esp. during Covid), but way better than a few years ago.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#266

Post by abop »

nexus2045 wrote: post #253
_olsk wrote: post #237

Funny enough, I used to be depressed for almost my whole life and now I'm not. Two and a half years ago, I dropped out from an average university to be admitted in Harvard within one year. At that time I also had poor English, struggling to differentiate present and past simple tenses. In just two years, I ruined relationships with my relatives, lost all friends, don't talk to anyone, got a horribly loose skin, had a…

Man that is a crazy story. Congratulations on the English, wouldn't second-guess your fluency one bit. But I don't understand how you went through some social catastrophes and still manage to level-up in the rest of your life so well? Please allow me more vague details or in private for such an amazing turnaround. The reason I ask is because I have been struggling with socializing my whole life. While not autistic, I…

Check this out

https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/hiyzl/24_year_old_who...

It’s an AMA with a lot of practical action on facing social anxiety.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#267

Post by flightless »

watermelon59 wrote: post #61

Well, let's see. My wife left me shortly before the pandemic started. I tried leaning on alleged friends for emotional support and they bailed on me. I don't have any family here in the US. The pandemic hit and I had to stop practicing my sport. My work output has been 10-20% of what it used to be even though I don't have kids to deal with, or any of the things that are driving folks crazy. It takes me around 2h to m…

Do you have some savings? You should do a vacation in the south. Get some sunlight in a southern state (Cali, Texas, Florida). With proper planning your interactions with other people can be as minimal as your average gas station run-in.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#268

Post by petargyurov »

Subsentient wrote: post #246

I was miserable before it was cool. Before the pandemic, I had a development job in the neighboring city. I'd take a 2 hour commute each way, and when I got home, I'd immediately collapse, sleep, wake up, and head right back to work. I didn't check my phone, my voicemail, my email, or call anyone. Just sleep. I rarely ate. I listened to a lot of death metal during that time. The pandemic hit, and I lost my job, then…

> I'd take a 2 hour commute each way

I used to have a job like this. I dreaded waking up each day.

I would consider losing this job a blessing in disguise. I know that doesn't help right now but remember that things can always get better.

Some things that would make an immediate impact:

- spend more time outside (go for walks)

- exercise

- socialise (it's hard right now, but speaking to a person IRL is a vital part to what makes us human)

- write things down

- tidy up your room/house

- get into a routine incorporating all of the above

If you need to chat, you can email me.

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#269

Post by argc »

hunterwerlla wrote: post #222
riffraff wrote: post #199

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am not trying to be dismissive, I understand missing people, but why can't you support people around you in a remote environment? You can pair with someone, or have informal chats, or plan some online game with your colleagues, have presentations in your team around work or non-work related things, setup a book club. It is harder and not as good as in-person interaction, but maybe you can get some good out of it. E…

I very much disagree with this. I agree with the top level comment, remote work is not for me. I understand that some people work well with remote work, but for some reason people who like remote work seem to not understand that some people prefer working in the office. I don't think that these kind of things replace an in person environment, and I'm really looking forward to when I can go back into the office.

I like doing programming at home but talking to people in the office. Trying to connect with someone over zoom is the most worthless exercise

Re: Ask HN: Are you depressed?

#270

Post by febin »

Presently no, but I faced depression for almost six years.

I faced continuous failures in college between 2010 -2013. Dropped from one degree, tried another but didn't go well either.

Then with broken skills in coding, set out to build a startup with strangers (now close friends).

That was for three years and didn't work out either. There were times I didn't have money for food.

Couldn't go back home, as an introvert didn't feel like sharing even to people I was close to.

Situations changed in 2018, articles sharing my learnings hit an audience of 50-100K.

Got contract for a book, Linked-In was filled with job offers. Later, I got into a great startup.

Befriend uncertainty, I survived six years of depression, you can make through one. Stay Hopeful!

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