131–140 of 277 posts
One of the more rewarding experiences I had last year was attending Meetups with people significantly older than myself.
The older you get , the harder making friends becomes. It's so bad I'd suggest to comp sci majors to consider a Liberal Arts degree instead if they're having trouble socializing.
CBT
She mentioned this and I had to tell her it's also something else. She was surprised she hadn't heard of the other meaning before.
1. How to spend less than you earn. Lots of people desire “financial freedom”, meaning they can spend what they want when they want it. Solving this via revenue leads to the hedonic treadmill, and you’ll never out earn your growing wants. Instead solve this by controlling your wants, and you’ve achieved financial freedom immediately. 2. How to take risks. Finding the balance between recklessness and absolute risk avo…
The term financial freedom doesn't just mean "making more than you spend". Above a certain income level you get the freedom to splurge. Being able to sit at a restaurant with a friend and not always choose the cheapest option is financial freedom. You can't get that by belt-tightening.
2. Risk isn't the same for everyone. it is fundamentally easier for certain people to take risks. If you make $200k per year, you can probably afford to gamble a little. But what if you only have a couple of hundred dollars to spend after rent and bills every month? Sure there are occasionally successful people who come from nothing, but starting a business or pivoting careers is much easier when you already have money.
How to manage yourself when tragedy inevitably strikes How to take advantage of people... that way they are less likely to be taken advantage of Restraint enough that, though they know how, they don’t take advantage of others How to look for sense of self satisfaction within yourself rather than in the approval of others Not really a skill, but a habit of intense exercise at least 30m a day. Running and swimming are…
> How to manage yourself when tragedy inevitably strikes This is a place where, in my opinion, religion is seriously overlooked in modern culture. The times when my religious upbringing have been most useful to me have all been in the face tragedy.
That's easily the difference between being an isolated island of a person, miserable thinking the world is against you. Or being a bit down, and getting a hand up.
1. How to spend less than you earn. Lots of people desire “financial freedom”, meaning they can spend what they want when they want it. Solving this via revenue leads to the hedonic treadmill, and you’ll never out earn your growing wants. Instead solve this by controlling your wants, and you’ve achieved financial freedom immediately. 2. How to take risks. Finding the balance between recklessness and absolute risk avo…
1. Spoken like someone who has been lucky. Before I was a dev, I worked less profitable jobs. I was no where near the poverty line, but life is expensive and you can only reduce expenses to a point. Sure, you can probably ease the burden by spending less, but at a certain point spending less means living an ascetic life, free from any frivolous pleasures. The term financial freedom doesn't just mean "making more than…
2. This is the exact point. Each of us have to judge the consequences of failure for each decision. If you only have a couple hundred dollars left after expenses, risk aversion is the right call—-and falls well within the real of managing your risk.
Don't double down out of pride or get flustered when you are wrong if you know you are wrong. To boot, nothing will make people remember you were wrong more than you making a fuss about whatever you are wrong about.
And it's so easy to let it slide. You'd hardly be the first. But it really is better to do it. Contrary to what insecurity tells you, reasonable (and non-adversarial) people will respect you more.
1. Learning to learn. When you learn to play an instrument or a language you should learn to learn better. So learning something new becomes easier.
That is learning about space repetition software and how your memory works. Physical and mental fatigue,moderate stress, diet, relaxation times and sleep.
One of the best abilities that you could master is the ability to learn from the masters in any discipline, what is called in psychology "modeling", and it is natural for kids. That usually takes letting some part of yourself to die, accepting that you are wrong at something, and it for adults is incredible painful and rewarding at the same time.
2. Managing your emotions in front of your opposite sex, in front of threats, in front of a big audience. In front of important work to do.
Getting gradually out of your comfort zone. Taking and handling bigger and bigger risks while knowing your limitations. Again that means accepting (a small)suffering as a routine.
Being conscious about what you are feeling at every moment and knowing what to do helps you master procrastination in you and in others.
That makes you incredible attractive and resourceful person.
To speak in front of lots of people you need to have something important to say to them. You need to find something more important than yourself.
In general those skills are counterintuitive, like doing routine exercise means suffering a little every day but over months or years it improves you so much most people just wont be able to compete with you at psychical or metal tasks.