11–20 of 23 posts
If that doesn't help, switch jobs and try to make more money. Money is nice, but after a few years I'll bet one of two things will happen:
* you'll be happy you have gobs of money, and you'll keep chasing it
* you'll realize other things make you happy (status, time, relationships) and you'll decide to pursue those
Oh, and keep up with the therapy.
Then, spend the rest of your evening serving food and carefully notice how everyone smiles and thanks you as you serve gruel, mashed potatoes, plain pasta, and water.
Next, think how much that person might earn in his lifetime and compare it with 3 years of your salary.
Then, you'll begin to appreciate that life is more than just making 150k or 200k.
If after that all you still care about is money and being able to brag about having a white collar job at some dumb tech company go somewhere else.
If this drives you to earn more, go earn more. Get a job at Google, get the 300k. If that's not what you want then don't. You are earning a huge amount and are working at a well respected company. You are doing awesome. Seriously you're kicking ass. Don't take this the wrong way but maybe it's time to grow up a little bit. You should not feel this bad because someone else is doing better than you. This is the definit…
A week of your pay is more than many people make in a year. A day's pay, even.
https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-17312819
If you _must_ compare to your peers (though I would add that a job is just a thing you do for money and your "peers" should be your fellow humans), chat with your European colleagues about pay.
The next time you get a pizza delivered, realize you make more in an hour than that person will make all day (roughly).
It's one thing if you're struggling to meet the basics of life, but at this point you're worrying about arbitrary nubers here and money, to some extent, is a made up fiction we all collectively decide is useful.
I mean, I make less than you, and I suppose I should feel bad, but I also get a month off a year, I see my kids on my lunch break (I work remote), I had paid paternity leave, and best of all, every worker around me, even the person behind the counter at the fish and chip shop gets these things too, which makes me happy. In my view, I suspect I'm richer than you in the ways I care about. Maybe you could try a similar reorienting of your values?
Your current gig is going to make your next gig easier. The FAANGs all seem to recruit each other's people if that's a thing you are interested in.
Do you like the work you're doing? You might hate it if you moved. The grass is not always greener.
I would also reconsider the idea that you're not at an elite company and these other peers are. I sincerely doubt the level of engineering is radically different among the big tech companies. Considering Google "elite" but not Amazon seems strange to me. As one anecdote, check out Steve Yegge's long blog posts about platforms - https://gist.github.com/chitchcock/1281611
Also, check out levels.fyi. The gap might not be as big as you think it is. You may be overvaluing outliers.
From looking at your other posts - in addition to other suggestions, you should probably avoid LinkedIn. Replace it with browsing this: https://twitter.com/BestofLinkedin
Finally, do you have a mentor? Someone who you can talk to about this stuff, maybe someone outside your org?
Your biggest asset is the passion you put in your job, and you should do everything you can to reward it. Don't use money to value how good you are doing, but use the "Am I happy with what I do? Am I satisfied of my job"?
I am saying this because being unhappy with that you do is probably the reason that is is holding you back.
Personally, while I have enjoyed salaries like the one you mention, I have never let me stop me from leaving a company with a toxic culture OR because I was simply not satisfied with what I was doing.
I have subject myself and my family to a > 50% reduction on income (!) just to find myself satisfied again with my job.
If you can remove yourself from the money equation, you will find much more satisfaction in what you do.
I always say that people in our situation owe to themselves to maximise their happiness at work simply because we CAN. You can choose to join a more exciting startup. You can choose to explore a new career path.
Don't let money be what you use to define your success.
Simple suggestion - take $500 each month and go to a soup kitchen near your house. Buy something nice for everyone there - you'll be shocked how far your $500 can stretch. It can be as simple as 400 doughnuts and several gallons of coffee from Dunkin Donuts. Then, spend the rest of your evening serving food and carefully notice how everyone smiles and thanks you as you serve gruel, mashed potatoes, plain pasta, and w…