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R U OK?

ruok.org.au

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Re: R U OK?

#121

Post by birksherty »

swyx wrote: post #101
ericmcer wrote: post #96

Something I am struggling with recently is less am I ok, but more do we as humans deserve to be ok? When I look at the freeways full of cars, streets lined with overflowing garbage cans, homeless encampments, grocery stores with row after row of cheap meat under fluorescent light. Am I supposed to feel ok? It many times feels as though we are a virus decimating our host environment. The constant flood of bad news com…

there's a lot of bad in the world, but also keep in mind the Steven Pinker argument that we have progressed a lot compared to human history as well. as for dealing with it - personally i embrace the idea of "keep your circle of concern as small as possible to your circle of influence". practically, it works out to "stop giving a crap" which i know is not responsible en masse. i guess the only thing to do if you feel…

I don't agree with Pinker. World is better if only world=only humans. Only a selfish species would say that or one who wants to feel good. For every other species it's too bad.

Re: R U OK?

#122

Post by calvano915 »

birksherty wrote: post #94
tralarpa wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> No. I don't think I am depressed. Yup, that's a depression. Stuck in a gray cloud of meaningless and dull pain. Neither bright sunshine, nor black night. And you are a smart person and probably convinced yourself by logical reasoning that's how life is supposed to be. Look for professional help. When my car is broken I accept the fact that there are people who are better at fixing cars than me.

Okay. But what if reality is bad kind of like the cinema Matrix. Someone see the truth get sad but society tells they are mentally sick. Those who are inside matrix are regarded as normal and that's how everyone should be. People are not supposed to see the truth and only that keeps them happy. I'm not talking about the computer simulation here but the life itself.

I've taken solace that someday my time will come where I will no longer feel or consciously exist (death). So I've decided to work on gratitude first and all other life pursuits secondarily. Life is like a rollercoaster, there will always be ups and downs, until the ride is over. I get someone wanting things to end if they experience physical pain or disease with no escape, but like others have mentioned you're experiencing mental pain and there are options to work on that. How you feel matters, and you're not wrong in many of your perceptions, but you still deserve to feel better and find things that add joy to your life.

Also, I discovered this in a previous thread and it has been helpful in finding a way to navigate this seemingly very dystopian existence we humans choose to perpetuate: https://youtu.be/A9LI1Dv0DEg

Re: R U OK?

#123

Post by zulu-inuoe »

anm89 wrote: post #119

Remember, if you are in the US at least, and someone tells you they aren't ok, and you recommend a crisis line, and they mention anything regarding suicide, they are very likely going to be extracted from their living situation by force and end up incarcerated at very high expense to themselves. If their life was going poorly before that, it sure won't be better after. edit: as another poster mentioned, the record of…

I've been a victim of this very thing, and can certainly second this.

My friend was trying to be helpful, but I lost 2 weeks of my life and felt dehumanized during and after it.

I don't blame them, because it's very counter-intuitive, but

TLDR - be careful when contacting any sort of government authorities, because they often have far more consequences than you're considering in the moment.

Re: R U OK?

#124

Post by missingrib »

srtjstjsj wrote: post #73
hirundo wrote: post #69

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There are several options to exit without pain. I found one on the internet, and have prepared it. It was inexpensive and the components are not particularly suspicious. It's ready to go when I am. Somehow that makes me appreciate life more. Being able to leave at will makes staying sweeter. I can let go of much of the stress by knowing that it is voluntary and temporary, which lets me focus on the simple pleasures.…

I strongly suggest you throw those supplies in the trash. You can re obtain them if really needed. As it is, you are one bad day from taking an action that (based on populato statistical evidence) you will most likely immediately regret but cannot undo.

Can you post the statistical evidence that is based on?

Re: R U OK?

#125

Post by anm89 »

zulu-inuoe wrote: post #123
anm89 wrote: post #119

Remember, if you are in the US at least, and someone tells you they aren't ok, and you recommend a crisis line, and they mention anything regarding suicide, they are very likely going to be extracted from their living situation by force and end up incarcerated at very high expense to themselves. If their life was going poorly before that, it sure won't be better after. edit: as another poster mentioned, the record of…

I've been a victim of this very thing, and can certainly second this. My friend was trying to be helpful, but I lost 2 weeks of my life and felt dehumanized during and after it. I don't blame them, because it's very counter-intuitive, but TLDR - be careful when contacting any sort of government authorities, because they often have far more consequences than you're considering in the moment.

Yeah, it's a total travesty. I'm sorry to hear that you had to go through that.

And we wonder why people won't talk about suicide.

Re: R U OK?

#126

Post by Grimm1 »

ARandomerDude wrote: post #120
bradenb wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Of course we deserve to be OK. Every species* deserves to be OK and every species fights to be OK. We have a lot of work to do to make sure we don't ruin our "host," but the fact that we are aware of the problem already--to me--says a lot about our desire to give up some comforts for a greater good. I think as a species we're always just doing the best we think we (collectively) can do at any given time. Some individ…

> Every species* deserves to be OK Please don't take this is as contrarian trolling, but as a catalyst for reflection: what makes that statement true? What is the foundation for us deserving to be OK?

What's the foundation for us not deserving to be OK? Equally not trolling. I frankly find the notion of deserving in this case to have very little meaning. Life I don't think has these moral absolutes, can you make it okay for yourself? If so then congrats you get to be okay regardless of somebody's subjective thought on the matter.

Re: R U OK?

#127

Post by TheAdamAndChe »

ARandomerDude wrote: post #120
bradenb wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Of course we deserve to be OK. Every species* deserves to be OK and every species fights to be OK. We have a lot of work to do to make sure we don't ruin our "host," but the fact that we are aware of the problem already--to me--says a lot about our desire to give up some comforts for a greater good. I think as a species we're always just doing the best we think we (collectively) can do at any given time. Some individ…

> Every species* deserves to be OK Please don't take this is as contrarian trolling, but as a catalyst for reflection: what makes that statement true? What is the foundation for us deserving to be OK?

From an evolutionary perspective, you are technically right. We've evolved to reproduce and to support traits that aid in reproduction. From that perspective, it doesn't matter if we as individuals are okay or not.

However, we evolved from social, tribal apes. As an individual, I want to optimize my own happiness and contentness because it feels good. Humans have mirror neurons that cause me to feel the emotions I see in others. Because of that, I have an incentive not only to fight for my own comfort and happiness, but the happiness of others.

What's interesting is that our mirror neurons can extend past humans. I have the capacity to feel for other animals. That gives me an incentive to either care for their happiness or never think of them whatsoever.

Re: R U OK?

#128

Post by olau »

ericmcer wrote: post #96

Something I am struggling with recently is less am I ok, but more do we as humans deserve to be ok? When I look at the freeways full of cars, streets lined with overflowing garbage cans, homeless encampments, grocery stores with row after row of cheap meat under fluorescent light. Am I supposed to feel ok? It many times feels as though we are a virus decimating our host environment. The constant flood of bad news com…

Do something about it. If you work on it, it's likely you'll inspire other people. If you don't know how to start, look to others for inspiration.

If we all do something to make the world a better place, it WILL be a better place.

Also, say no to bad stuff as much as you can muster. You'll probably get better at it over time.

Re: R U OK?

#129

Post by JadeNB »

Ma8ee wrote: post #103
swyx wrote: post #101

Earlier quoted context omitted.

there's a lot of bad in the world, but also keep in mind the Steven Pinker argument that we have progressed a lot compared to human history as well. as for dealing with it - personally i embrace the idea of "keep your circle of concern as small as possible to your circle of influence". practically, it works out to "stop giving a crap" which i know is not responsible en masse. i guess the only thing to do if you feel…

I certainly don't interpret "keep your circle of concern as small as possible to your circle of influence" as "stop giving a crap". I actually means that you for example should decrease the amount of meat you eat and try to find other means of transportation than car if possible. Each and everyone of us influence the environment in many ways. And even if your influence is small, the total is the sum of all our contri…

> I certainly don't interpret "keep your circle of concern as small as possible to your circle of influence" as "stop giving a crap". I actually means that you for example should decrease the amount of meat you eat and try to find other means of transportation than car if possible.

Exactly—before trying to solve the world's problems (and getting frustrated because you can't), try to solve the problems closer to home (and get motivated because, if you keep your focus small enough, you can).

Re: R U OK?

#130

Post by tgv »

zulu-inuoe wrote: post #123
anm89 wrote: post #119

Remember, if you are in the US at least, and someone tells you they aren't ok, and you recommend a crisis line, and they mention anything regarding suicide, they are very likely going to be extracted from their living situation by force and end up incarcerated at very high expense to themselves. If their life was going poorly before that, it sure won't be better after. edit: as another poster mentioned, the record of…

I've been a victim of this very thing, and can certainly second this. My friend was trying to be helpful, but I lost 2 weeks of my life and felt dehumanized during and after it. I don't blame them, because it's very counter-intuitive, but TLDR - be careful when contacting any sort of government authorities, because they often have far more consequences than you're considering in the moment.

This leaves me slightly perplexed. Care to describe what happened in a bit more detail?
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