This answer chimes the most with my experience. Particularly:
> It's perfectly reasonable to say "I think I may have ADHD based on what I've read online, my symptoms match and people who know me have suggested I try adderall".
Spot on! (Except for suggesting a prescription: the doctor will be able to establish whether, for example, a prodrug like lisdexamfetamine is better than adderall, or methylphenidate might be a safer starting point (I believe it's been studied for longer).)
But yeah: there is zero shame in going to a doctor and stating that you are experiencing symptoms which you recently learned to be consistent with ADHD, and would like a professional opinion on the severity and potential treatment options. Reading the traits commonly associated with ADHD, you'd almost expect someone to have done a great deal of research about the topic.
> It's hard to explain to someone that doesn't do drugs, but stimulants can leave you feeling like a shell of yourself
I've found (40mg lisdexamfetamine, but also previously had IR/XR Adderall, 2x titrations of Concerta, and an abortive attempt at Medikinet which is a different XR timed release formulation of methylphenidate as I understand it) that this is true to an extent. I don't dose on the weekends and have found that Mondays are a blur. It's 4pm before I know it and I'm wired and working on spreadsheets well into the night.
The closest thing I can express to how I know the drug is effective is that there is almost a directional cone of focus which I need to very consciously redirect to a new area of focus. If someone comes to speak to me I'm able to context switch, but moving from one task to another can require effort.
When I didn't eat enough or appear to have a faster metabolisation of the drugs than normal, I can have a feeling of focus for focus's sake: I'm blind to what's going on around me and uncommunicative.
For me, however, in the main the medication has been a pleasant experience. It's helped me to regulate my moods and dark sides -- particularly under stress. This will not be the case for everyone, and a good doctor will be up front about the fact that your body will react differently to different drugs. They'll have a preferred starting point for treatment which they know well, but they will not be afraid to switch it up in order to find you a solution which works well.
BTW I'm really glad that you shared in as much detail as you did given the empathy I feel for OP's potential need to battle ADHD symptoms without treatment in order to even get to treatment. It's really kind of you and I'm glad there are so many people on HN who have been through similar experiences to me. After experiencing 30-odd years of thinking I was deficient in some way, feeling the resonance of other people's similar experiences has been a huge boon for me. So thanks.