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Reflections on Being a Female Founder

tracy.posthaven.com

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Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#251

Post by skocznymroczny »

jwr wrote: post #222
jacquesm wrote: post #216

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is much more of a thing in the United States than elsewhere in the world.

Definitely. In most of Europe things are more normal: it's normal for women to be prime ministers or presidents, it's OK to breastfeed your child in public, and at least among my programmer peers, women are regarded with more respect than men (since there are so few of them in IT). In Poland, the catholic church and the "conservatives" still work hard at enforcing the old barbaric gender stereotypes, but they get lit…

I don't really understand why the need to single out Poland. In recent history Poland had a transgender MP, openly gay MP and three female prime ministers. Breastfeeding in public isn't a taboo in Poland either.

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#252

Post by asdfasgasdgasdg »

the_af wrote: post #250
asdfasgasdgasdg wrote: post #201

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have kids. Including a one and a half year old. He wants a lot of attention, and he gets it, especially in these covid times. But wanting attention and needing it are different things.

It's both. When I hear that "kids don't demand that much attention" it feels terribly insulting, plus it opens the door for terrible job practices, demanding from parents and telling them "don't use your kids as an excuse, they don't actually demand too much". The notion that a 2 year old can take care of him/herself is ridiculous. No-one who has a 2 year old will actually say that. That's why I asked the parent post…

> This flies in the face of evidence

What evidence, beyond your assertions? Fwiw I do not believe the person you are quoting meant that you can literally leave your child at home alone all day. Rather they are suggesting you don't need to be their playmate and constant companion.

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#253

Post by drobert »

galoisgirl wrote: post #234
drobert wrote: post #215

We had gender roles because it was the most effective way to survive and raise a family. The cost was that women were assigned rather basic responsibilities. Because tech and services have evolved families can outsource some of the chors done by women in the past like cooking, cleaning. In the case of making babies the the technology is still in development but we will get there. Artificial wombs will be an option in…

> But few women when given the choice would choose to do what she did. Feeding a baby in the car while doing research seems far from desirable for most women I presume. Then the question is why she did it? I'd say the question is why men do it. In The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, all men say "I wish I hadn't worked so hard". (That's the second after "I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the…

I think for men the incentives are different. If they succeed they have more options in dating, financial freedom, respect from other men, etc. Women get respect too but don't think more dating options (I would even presume the opposite). I met few women that are heavily into investments and becoming independent financially. Women value more relationships, happiness. Men are willing to sacrifice those for money and fame.

The fundamental issue at hand is sexual selection and the desire to leave something behind. It goes beyond societal norms and is buried deep into our biology.

> Men Wanted: For hazardous journey. Small wages, bitter cold, long months of complete darkness, constant danger, safe return doubtful. Honour and recognition in case of success. Ernest Shackleton

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#255

Post by xchip »

I'd be love to know more women that have the same tech interests and passions as me.

Unfortunately for me not only there aren't many, most of them see tech as something for nerds.

So please get more women into tech before I am too old :)

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#256

Post by davedx »

yomly wrote: post #169
divbzero wrote: post #114

> On some days, I would park my car on a sleepy street in Palo Alto and pump milk with a silicone hand pump in front of someone’s nice house, reading profiles of the investors in my next meeting from my iPhone. Occasionally someone would drive up, or a jogger would run by, and I would feel completely humiliated. This is just a small bit of everything Tracy wrote. But I would love to see this stigma changed. There sho…

Taking a step back from her story, I find it so weird that we stigmatise some of the most universal human experiences. Essentially every person will piss burp fart and poop. And almost every person has one of two genitals. (EDIT and our biological parents will have one of each). And almost every mother will feed their baby with their breasts. And yet we have become so detached from the animal part of our identity and…

Yeah, the Netherlands is pretty good with the "animal side" of us as you put it (though it depends where you live too, in more religious areas clothing customs and attitudes towards sex etc. are quite different). Where I think NL still has some work to do is casual sexism/stereotyping. I'm sure it's better than many other places but there's still plenty of it around.

We can all do better, and even where things seem good we need to always be vigilant.

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#257

Post by Cactus2018 »

satyrnein wrote: post #38

I wish there were a clear bad guy here, but most of the hardship seems to have been caused by more diffuse social pressures. What could we have done as an industry to improve the author's experience? Maybe just having more female founders around in general (by removing any barriers) would make some of these circumstances more commonplace.

> I wish there were a clear bad guy here,

Clearly this is the bad guy:

"one of our own VC's caller her a "little girl" while doing a fireside chat with her at PlanGrid"

Bonus bad guys from the comments:

"...potential investors take female founders out for dinner, ostensibly to talk over the potential investment but in reality as an attempt to sleep with them. ..."

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#258

Post by lookupthere »

jacquesm wrote: post #216
yomly wrote: post #169

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Taking a step back from her story, I find it so weird that we stigmatise some of the most universal human experiences. Essentially every person will piss burp fart and poop. And almost every person has one of two genitals. (EDIT and our biological parents will have one of each). And almost every mother will feed their baby with their breasts. And yet we have become so detached from the animal part of our identity and…

This is much more of a thing in the United States than elsewhere in the world.

Definitely. Most of Sub-Saharan Africa as well doesn't have an issue with breastfeeding at all.

The strange thing for me in the US is that the left doesn't seem bothered by it. They are usually all up to point out arbitrary social constructs but this isn't an issue for them? Am I missing something?

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#259

Post by jwr »

skocznymroczny wrote: post #251
jwr wrote: post #222

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Definitely. In most of Europe things are more normal: it's normal for women to be prime ministers or presidents, it's OK to breastfeed your child in public, and at least among my programmer peers, women are regarded with more respect than men (since there are so few of them in IT). In Poland, the catholic church and the "conservatives" still work hard at enforcing the old barbaric gender stereotypes, but they get lit…

I don't really understand why the need to single out Poland. In recent history Poland had a transgender MP, openly gay MP and three female prime ministers. Breastfeeding in public isn't a taboo in Poland either.

Oh, that's just because I happen to live in Poland (most of the time) and I'm very annoyed by these attempts to "put women in their place" (usually, the kitchen, and with child-bearing duties).

What I meant is that things are good, but the church and conservatives are hard at work, trying to make them worse.

Re: Reflections on Being a Female Founder

#260

Post by scott_s »

_pzdn wrote: post #249
galoisgirl wrote: post #232

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This has been discussed once or twice... What did your search engine tell you?

I was following the time honored HN tradition of posting one line about the article and then taking up a tangent. That might be a practice to do away with. But to be literal, I asked because I wanted to talk about it and not just read about. However that may have been a mistake on my part; this article, found through my search engine, was pretty good: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/aug/08/why-are... Po…

> I was following the time honored HN tradition of posting one line about the article and then taking up a tangent.

Please don't.

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