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Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

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Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#1

Post by tommartin12 »

I am running a startup with my technical co-founder, we have a personal friendship that led us to starting the company together. I convinced him to quit his day job working at a large company. He has not ever worked outside of a large corporation before. I am the business/SEO/marketing guy.

The kicker is that we are working remotely, he is working in one country, while I am in another country. The target market for our product is the country where I am based. At the start, we agreed to this arrangement.

I am however finding the strains of working remotely a big stress on this relationship.

1. I don't have visibility on what he is doing, and he is of an introverted nature, so he will never skype me first, I always have to skype him or ask him a question and then he responds.

2. We are expanding and hiring people, and without my technical co-founder on the ground here, it is very difficult to lead technical people. I have a better relationship with the other technical person in our company because I am on the ground here, I don't think this situation is ideal.

3. Since we started the company, we have pivoted several directions that requires my co-founder to learn a new programming language(objective C), however he has struggled to get up to speed quickly(2 months and no code produced), so we had to hire someone to basically continue product development.

4. I don't feel like he puts in "extra" into the company, things like working weekends, coming up with new ideas, etc...

I don't know whether I am unrealistic in expecting him to learn a new language, but his inability to do so has shaken my faith in his technical abilities.

The product and the company I feel is taking off, we will be trying to raise a seed round soon, but I am very concerned with my co-founder. I don't feel like he is a co-founder, I am making all the decisions and he has very little to say about the major directions of our product, just agreeing with me.

We are going to raise money soon and I don't know if I can scale the company with my friend and co-founder? Am I being paranoid? What should I do?

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#3

Post by rick888 »

That's a tough situation to be in. It's probably going to ruin your friendship. Do you have a contract?

I have friends that are great coders, but I know they probably wouldn't be a good co-founder. I also have some friends that would make great co-founders.

It sounds to me like your friend would be a better employee. Founders of a company should be sacrificing and busting-ass every waking moment.

Could you ask him to fly/temporarily move to your country?

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#4

Post by tommartin12 »

apu wrote: post #2

Is there a chance he could move to your country? Is he still accomplishing anything? Do you know what his personal situation is like (any recent troubles)? Have you formally started the company? What's the equity split like? Do you have any revenue?

1. Yes, but it is a chicken and the egg, he is not willing to move unless we can raise funding, but... Most investors will not invest unless we have the whole team together.

2. Yes, we are still going full steam ahead, but I just have this nagging feeling that it will not end well.

3. He is very private about his personal life, there is a girlfriend in the picture which factors into his reluctance to move.

4. Yes, formally started.

5. 70/30, I have 70

6. No revenue yet, it's a consumer based startup, so free product at this stage.

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#5

Post by tommartin12 »

rick888 wrote: post #3

That's a tough situation to be in. It's probably going to ruin your friendship. Do you have a contract? I have friends that are great coders, but I know they probably wouldn't be a good co-founder. I also have some friends that would make great co-founders. It sounds to me like your friend would be a better employee. Founders of a company should be sacrificing and busting-ass every waking moment. Could you ask him to…

no contract, we talked about shareholder agreements but nothing put in writing.

I have asked him to move temporarily, after months of "nagging him", he has agreed to come for a month at a time.

But I feel like it's kinda self-defeating, I should not have to nag him to get him to do this.

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#6

Post by linuxdo0d »

tommartin12 wrote: post #5
rick888 wrote: post #3

That's a tough situation to be in. It's probably going to ruin your friendship. Do you have a contract? I have friends that are great coders, but I know they probably wouldn't be a good co-founder. I also have some friends that would make great co-founders. It sounds to me like your friend would be a better employee. Founders of a company should be sacrificing and busting-ass every waking moment. Could you ask him to…

no contract, we talked about shareholder agreements but nothing put in writing. I have asked him to move temporarily, after months of "nagging him", he has agreed to come for a month at a time. But I feel like it's kinda self-defeating, I should not have to nag him to get him to do this.

Hopefully this has been a good learning experience for you. Always understand that when you build a company with someone that you are starting a _professional_ relationship with that person, and that your personal relationship is going to come second to your professional relationship.

There are a ton of "gotchas" in this situation, remote country, target audience - but by far the biggest one is make sure you have a binding legal document that can help you out in situations like this. Make sure it's all in writing.

Good luck, sorry about the situation. Hopefully it gets better.

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#8

Post by gyardley »

tommartin12 wrote: post #5
rick888 wrote: post #3

That's a tough situation to be in. It's probably going to ruin your friendship. Do you have a contract? I have friends that are great coders, but I know they probably wouldn't be a good co-founder. I also have some friends that would make great co-founders. It sounds to me like your friend would be a better employee. Founders of a company should be sacrificing and busting-ass every waking moment. Could you ask him to…

no contract, we talked about shareholder agreements but nothing put in writing. I have asked him to move temporarily, after months of "nagging him", he has agreed to come for a month at a time. But I feel like it's kinda self-defeating, I should not have to nag him to get him to do this.

Before you do anything else, at all, take care of the paperwork. If you two part ways before everything's been formalized, you'll create a cloud of legal uncertainty over your start-up that'll make it very difficult to raise or have an exit.

In your agreement, you both should have a long period of founder vesting. Then, should you part ways, you can give your co-founder his share of equity multiplied by whatever fraction of the four years he worked.

Getting the paperwork right doesn't end with the shareholder agreements - you also need to make sure all the intellectual property is assigned to the company.

Actually, what you really need to do is sit down with a lawyer that knows what they're doing.

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#9

Post by bootdaddy »

gyardley wrote: post #8
tommartin12 wrote: post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

no contract, we talked about shareholder agreements but nothing put in writing. I have asked him to move temporarily, after months of "nagging him", he has agreed to come for a month at a time. But I feel like it's kinda self-defeating, I should not have to nag him to get him to do this.

Before you do anything else, at all, take care of the paperwork. If you two part ways before everything's been formalized, you'll create a cloud of legal uncertainty over your start-up that'll make it very difficult to raise or have an exit. In your agreement, you both should have a long period of founder vesting. Then, should you part ways, you can give your co-founder his share of equity multiplied by whatever frac…

Exactly! Get with an attorney quick. Other option is to find funding and buy him out now. Sometimes investors like stepping in where there is a shakeup, they feel like a savior, get more equity and presumably, control. If you can do this, part of the deal will be the full release agreement along with ip assignment.

Re: Ask HN: I think I want to breakup with my co-founder, help me

#10

Post by staunch »

coryl wrote: post #7

How did you end up with 70% compared to his 30%?

This could be part of the problem. A huge benefit of an equal partnership is that neither feels justified in feeling that the other person should do more of the work.

Even if you're intellectually okay with an uneven split it can gnaw at you subconsciously and effect motivation.

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