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Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

reuters.com

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Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#491

Post by tonystubblebine »

Debugreality wrote: post #460
quasarj wrote: post #345

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm glad you brought up the friend-zone thing. I feel like I'm extremely good at all the things you listed before that, and I have a ton of female friends (which I love, don't get me wrong). I just have no idea to turn that into sex.

Realise there is often a fine line between friends and friends with benefits. My advise would be let them know you find them attractive like offering compliments. Occasionally make a move to get closer, massage, touching etc. Spend time with them. It is likely they will be in the mood sooner or later and you will be the most convenient option. Basically let them know your interested and ask. If you don't ask you won'…

Also consider communication tactics to let them know you find them attractive like vocalizing the words, "I find you attractive. Would you like to go on a date?"

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#492

Post by coryfklein »

sjg007 wrote: post #453
downerending wrote: post #91

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've noticed this among the young men in my extended family and friends. One guy is model cute, and goes out on Tinder "dates" whenever he wants (new girl weekly, at least). He had a live-in girlfriend, but with an open relationship. And if I were one of these women, I'd probably do the same thing. Even if you can't marry a hottie, if you can have sex with one a few times, that still sounds like fun. The other guys,…

The advice to the normal guy in this scenario is to stop smoking pot and hit the gym. That will make up for a lot.

Sure some of one's attractiveness can be improved with fitness, but for everyone there's some amount of genetic lottery there; if you don't have it you ain't gonna get it.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#493

Post by randyrand »

malcolmgreaves wrote: post #112

A lot of guys are complaining in the thread, with undertones of an expectation of sex Most likely reason I see that would cause this data: the immense social pressure applied to straight women has lessened in the 21st century. A straight woman won't be ostricized at 25 if they don't "have a man." The data suggests that young straight men aren't having as much sex. I postulate that the only reason is that straight men…

Most people expect to have sex. It's why we teach sex education - because we expect sex among teens! Sex is normal. It's even worth planning and teaching for.

Maybe the word you meant to say is "entitled" to sex. That is pretty ridiculous for sure. There's a distinction, IMO.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#494

Post by zajio1am »

enriquto wrote: post #356
vsareto wrote: post #190

Earlier quoted context omitted.

So, "give us families, or we'll do crime and destabilize society"? Sounds like mental health problems are even more rampant than we guessed. We should probably handle that.

> Sounds like mental health problems are even more rampant than we guessed. We should probably handle that. Other than generalized chemical castration I don't see how you could eliminate the "problem" of most of the male population unfulfilled sex drive. For all its problems and unfairness, patriarchal society provides an answer to that problem, if an ugly one.

> Other than generalized chemical castration I don't see how you could eliminate the "problem" of most of the male population unfulfilled sex drive.

Traditional solution of the past was to lure them in the army and let them die in some foreign country.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#495

Post by michaelmrose »

troughway wrote: post #411
michaelmrose wrote: post #304

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe tinder isn't reality and many in fact most people meet each other outside of tinder. 78% of women aren't actually chasing the top 20% of men and are in fact available to meet outside of hook ups on tinder. Reducing women to vaginas on legs that can't be obtained outside of tinder is a big part of why 1/3 not 80% of men aren't getting much play. For other contributing factors I would look at generational differe…

>Maybe tinder isn't reality and many in fact most people meet each other outside of tinder. 78% of women aren't actually chasing the top 20% of men and are in fact available to meet outside of hook ups on tinder. No, Tinder is reality. It's naive to believe that just because it's a platform that facilitates communication and hookup that it's somehow disconnected from reality in it's own little microcosm or niche. All…

The author of the game calls it

"a book about scared men who were afraid of women."

He also says he himself at the time of writing suffered from mental illness.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/oct/10/neil-st...

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#496

Post by SeanAppleby »

watwut wrote: post #289
ravenstine wrote: post #207

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm 30, and I only know one person in my peer group whom owns a home, and he can only afford it because it's way out in the boonies. If people my age find things like home ownership out of reach, having children becomes a roadblock and therefore becomes undesirable.

Having home should not be requirement for having children. You quite literally don't need it.

People want to provide a stable home for their children.

Having to move can mean your kid has to find all new friends, and if buying a home is a complete impossibility for you, you might be further down Mazlowe's hierarchy than starting a family, and might have a life that's more financially brittle than you'd want it to be when you're taking care of kids.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#497

Post by rowawey »

tharne wrote: post #12

They buried the lede here. > Sexual activity was largely unchanged among unmarried women, along with no notable decline among gay men, researchers reported. Basically sex is following the pattern of wealth. Men as a group aren't having less sex, instead there's a winner take all effect where a small number of men are having a lot of sex with a lot of women while a large number of men are having little to no sex. It'l…

[dead]

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#498

Post by onetimeusename »

michaelmrose wrote: post #477
onetimeusename wrote: post #465

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The study didn't say anything about Tinder. However, your theory doesn't hold up. The study found that men who had part time employment, no employment, or were students were more likely to be sexually inactive. There isn't any data that suggests that those men are only using Tinder and failing or anything else you described. If you define inequality in terms of employment or wealth, you may be right, but that does in…

Women wanting a man with a job that pays enough not to live with mom isn't "hypergamy". The literal problem you are naming is inequality wherein an increasing minority can't afford a decent life despite working. It's not a defect in female choice its about the bottom 1/3 sharing a single digit percentage of the wealth and income. Females aren't all chasing the top 20% rich tall guys they are all chasing someone high…

That still is hypergamy. You are just stating that women have preferences. That is exactly what hypergamy means. That women have preferences that suit their own tastes. That is their prerogative.

What is not true though is that this is entirely an economic problem. If it were entirely economic, then why did sexual activity decrease for men but not women? Is that because men gave up? Are men disproportionately likely to self sabotage? Are men disproportionately likely to suffer from economic inequality than women? Do men not care about economic status in partners but women do?

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#499

Post by whytaka »

selimthegrim wrote: post #489
whytaka wrote: post #443

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Romantic relationships don't cure anger nor violence. I can honestly pinpoint you the day my life changed forever for the better. It's the day I lost my virginity. That one moment where I felt myself being accepted made me realize I was good enough. Ever since then, I'd become less angry, more confident, more loving of myself, more charitable towards other people's insecurities instead of positioning myself higher…

You're saying even if the sex was objectively bad in comparison with what you had later you still felt this way?

I am sorry, I don't really understand your question. Perhaps you could rephrase it.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#500

Post by thrwaway69 »

johncena33 wrote: post #409
klmadfejno wrote: post #312

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There's a large amount of debate over this issue. Whatever your opinion may be, the study doesn't seem to agree with it: https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle... Look at the chart for number of sexual partners reported by men and women by year. Honestly just read the study. It has data on many of the issues people are speculating about, including porn and what not. If you were to believe that a…

As minority man of color my own experience as well as my friends experience are absolutely in line with what OP has stated. Although I am well-educated, successful and reasonably good-looking, I've a hard time dating. OTOH women of my ethnicity do pretty well in dating market. The only way to explain this phenomenon is hypergamy. Everyone I know in real life (from different genders and ethnicities) acknowledges this.…

What minority category is this?
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